I feel guilty/weak like it was my fault she lost interest. Girls I need you to be honest

She was 18, and I was 20. We dated for a year. I told her I was living in a living room. I mentioned I was emberrased, and asked if she can buy us time while I move out. She agreed, and instead she took me to her house. I met her parents they are educated, nice, respectful. We kept dating only our dates were always outdoor like a park, and never indoor like a house. The first 3 months were amazing. She'll make out, touch me, send me sexy pics, hmu 24/7. One night in 6th month we went to the beach. I tried having sex with her there, and she stopped me. She said she was a virgin, but will lmk when ready. Never again I tried and we kept dating. Months later I guess she got bored, and all went bad. She'll go to clubs, parties get drunk with her girls. I'll see her flirting online. I'll see pics of her dirty dancing, cuddling with her guy friends, sitting on her guy friends lap for a quick "group pic", kissing GIRLS. We'll break up, and make up. Things finally changed because I got my place on our 12th month anniversary. I invited her, and we talked about sex since a long time. Now she said she wants to wait till marriage!. Still I tried having sex with her and she dumped me.

Been 7 months, and my ex still tries talking to me. She's now with a girl I guess she was gay all along or bi. I'm now with a girl + sleeping with her. Looking back do you believe she was even a virgin? I feel guilty/weak like it was my fault she lost interest


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Most Helpful Girl

  • If you don't know if she was a virgin and you dated her for a year, we certainly don't know.

    Theres nothing you said that would prove that she's not a virgin or not. I've drank and went to parties, kissed a girl and sat on some laps when I was a virgin too so I wouldn't say that's a good indicator; may be she was just having fun and experimenting. If she was generally an honest person then there's no reason to doubt her.

    The better question is why does it matter anymore? If your both with other people and your happy, your ex shouldn't be your concern anymore, her virginity especially shouldn't be your concern. Maybe she lost interest or maybe didn't like that you still pursued sex with her when she said no, it could have ended for many reasons; that's something you should have asked when you guys broke up.

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What Girls Said 17

  • If she is with a girl now and never had any interest in having sex with you when you were together for over a year.. well she was clearly not into you and maybe not into guys either. Don't feel guilty. Some things just aren't meant to be. And what does it matter if you are now with somebody else. Move on. It was an experience and just for your information for next time...girls that want to be in a relationship with you and want you and all of you will want to have sex; virgin or not.

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  • I think she was a virgin. Don't blame yourself; if you had slept with her, she would have only regretted it (considering she's saving herself now).

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  • oh my goodness. Does she still talk to you like she did when you two were together? I think she was not a virgin and only used that excuse so she didn't have to have sex with you. Honestly, it seems like she used you as a cover up and once you kept bothering her about the sex thing she broke up with you because she was running out of excuses. I wouldn't bother, just forget about her and plus you've moved on so that's always a good thing.

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  • No, don't think it was your fault. If she didn't want to then how was it your fault? I can't say yes or no to if she was a virgin. But it's not your fault...especially if she is gay or bi. It was her choice not to.

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  • No, she's just a hoe. And, she was lesbian all along. You didn't do anything wrong.. she's just into girls.

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  • I think she was using you as cover up maybe. Still you should have waited and respected her wish to not have sex. Are you with girls for sex or because you see something in them that is datable.

    And how on Earth were you in a 12 year relationship? !

    Do you mean 2nd anniversary by any chance?

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    • 12 week anniversary. Lol they don't go by years this generation cause all the stars get married and divorced within a weeks time. So anniversaries come in weeks lol

  • This is the second time you've asked this. You know that, right?

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  • No. She is gay

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  • Probably not

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  • I'm sorry, your 12th anniversary? She's 18? Le maths don't add up. I proclaim bullsh*t.

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  • she might have been gay even when she was with you and when she found out she dumped you.I don't think you did anything wrong so don't take it personally.

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    • Yes your right! seen comments before but thought it was jokes

  • She probably was a virgin, she was probably to nervous to do anything with a man since she did have sexual feelings for girls.

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  • no she was proply looking for a excuse not to she probly focused on the turn offs or she was getting it from someone else wen your a virgin your to nervous to send sexy pics and all the things you said...

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  • PLEASE stop spamming this site with this question.

    It's just weird.

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  • I think you're a dog who didn't respect her wish to wait and she felt pressured and she has a very interesting line that she won't cross and you didn't respect her and it has nothing to do with you waiting too long. If she's waiting till marriage for sex it doesn't matter when you try to have sex, if you two haven't said your I do's and you don't have wedding rings on your fingers then you're not getting any.

    Get over it.

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  • I fail to see the emergency in this. Your main priority seemed to be about getting sex, and now you're getting sex.

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  • She is so young though. Why did you try to have Sex so much. She probably was getting to figure herself out. And then she probably doesn't want to break her hymen till marriage. ..so gay sex is easier.

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What Guys Said 5

  • She was having you on, all along. Sorry you had to go through this. But she was maybe still trying to find out where she was really at in terms of her sexuality, and was very confused.

    But she should have told you she had gay feelings..

    This is sort of like not telling you about a current boyfriend..it's dishonest.

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  • your 20. you had a12 year relationship which means you started dating at younger than 8 and she was younger than 6?

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  • 12th anniversary?

    Anyway I don't really believe she's truly a lesbian. I think she's doing it out of comfort or attention.

    I do believe that losing her virginity could be a big step for her. It's true when she said she wasn't ready for it.

    But I could be wrong, maybe she's just not into the D.

    Who knows really.

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  • She's just an 18 year old girl who's trying to figure out who she is. What do you expect?

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  • Who cares you got a new girlfriend focus on her and forget the past

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