I feel like he's not interested in me. Should I listen to my head?

I've been seeing this guy for awhile now. In the beginning, it was amazing. A complete fairy tale, he really knew / did the things to make me fall for him. And from what he told me, he was falling for me. I was the best thing to happen to him in a long time, he said.

One day, we got into our first fight or disagreement. He didn't argue much, and then ignored me for a week. The next time we hung out, he was a complete a**hole.. After I left, he became super nice over text and he was his old self again when we hung out again. Said he was so happy that I was there, several times. And said that I'm a little bit amazing and a weird girl, then said he couldn't say I was completely amazing or anything too good about me Because then he wouldn't be playing hard to get and I asked why because I wouldn't want him anymore Because you only want what you can't have. Lol I was just playing along with him and he agreed. I don't think he was being serious.. I thought we was just joking around having a good time. I had an amazing time with him that night, he was even more cuddly in bed than usual. He was happy to see me. He texted me like normal for a week and then bam he went cold on me. One word texts, barely sending me two texts a day, we usually text all freaking day. And he canceled plans on me. I'm left confused. One day he was giggling with joy that I was there. And then a week later he canceled on me? So I told him how I felt about how he went cold on me and I feel like he's not interested in me. He ignored me for a week. I didn't think I was fighting, I even told him that I wasn't fighting or trying to start a fight. I was just telling him how I felt. He texted me yesterday, a week later, and we hung out. I told him I was gonna be out his way and I had time to kill and I could only hang out for a little bit Because I had plans. He asked what I was doing out this way, and a couple min later, didn't give me time to reply, said he might be going out later but yeah come over. He didn't have much to do with me, while I was there. He ended up making plans while I was there, got all dressed up and we left. I went to my plans, he went to his. No hug good bye, no kiss goodbye.

My head is telling me to just give up. Just to tell him "hey let's be just friends?" Stop this hot and cold stuff.

But my heart is like "don't give up. He's done this dbag thing before and he got over it. When he's not an ass, he is the most amazing guy ever. Just give it time."

I don't know what to do. I'm confused. I'm tired of this.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You have the answer right in front of you...he is playing hard to get because he feels like if he gives you everything you will get bored and leave.

    Judging from his actions he wasn't joking when he said that. A lot of guys think that way and to some extent it is true. There is a balance that needs to be kept but he is going a bit overboard with it.

    I know from personal experience. I have been with a girl and all eager and end up losing her fast. Then I have been with girls and just been aloof and they stick around until they get tired of feeling like, "you don't care."

    Just explain to him while it's cool that he's playing hard to get, he is playing TOO hard to get. Tell him it is making you have second thoughts because you do want someone who you feel cares.

    With any relationship, communication is key and with the internet being everyone's turn to for answers...it's easy to get bad advice or read a bad column. Honestly, he sounds like he lacks experience a bit with the relationship thing. Like I said, sit him down and talk to him.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Well sh*t. Five stars for typing that up.

    Understand that I have never met ether of you, so it is kinda hard to tell exactly what's going on. Saying that though, it sounds like he likes you. And you like him. I would say that he's not trying to be an ass. A couple of things could of happened, and I'm just putting them out there.

    First up, he could have somthing life changing happen to him in a bad way. Example, his parents might have divorced, or in the extreme, somone may have died. That would sure make me not want to talk to anyone.

    Second, and I doubt it, but he might have got into drugs, and feel pissed and/or guilty.

    Third, and from what you said I really doubt it, but he might have gotten into a relationship with another girl or had sex with someone and feels like you would never forgive him.

    Now the second and last one were a bit extreme, and as I said I really don't think that he would do that.

    Listen to your heart and give him a chance. Just talk about it to him. If worst comes to worst, maybe he wasn't good enough for you. But like I said, give him a chance.

    Feel free to pm me if you want to talk about it:)

    Hope it works out;)

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  • He could have some problems at work or study. I mean when someone in pressure he/she thinks that if they are wasting their time with him/her. Don't complaint to him, talk to him normally. Sometimes there are just too many things to handle. Give him a little comfort.

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