I've been dating this guy I met on match.com for 2 months. He's not seeing anyone else, as far as I know. He hasn't been on his match account in 3 weeks. When should we start talking about becoming boyfriend and girlfriend? Should I leave this up to him? We were hanging out last night and someone texted me and he jokingly asked if it was my other boyfriend. What should I do? Thanks!
ok, he asked you if it was your other boyfriend. he decided to skip asking you if you'd be his girl. in the future, if he's not the one and the next asks the same thing, say: so I'm your girl huh? that's news to me! as far as I know, there's never been a set time for becoming exclusive. that always depended on wether both of you didn't want the other to slip away. kind of like a guy asking a girl to marry him. if he's certain that she's not going anywhere, why buy the cow when the milk is free? yet another problem with casual sex.
Basically he didn't feel a need to make it exclusive or clarify...it was easy for him.
When my boyfriend and I met...I had many suitors after me, enough so that his first request was...whoops lol...politely declined. He'd asked me out when I had a pending date so I told him I couldn't cancel nor plan a new date until I knew more to avoid confusion. That guy had other plans come up...and my now boyfriend asked if I was upset and I basically scoffed. (I wasn't all that into the other guy lol...I just felt it rude to cancel.) So...he asked again and I accepted happily. We went out for lunch the next day and he kept my schedule for the next 4 days with dates (it was very mutual) and on date 4 he asked me to be his gf.
Why? Because if they decide they like something, they secure it. (;
Clearly this guy thinks you're already secured. Bring it up, if he doesn't oblige quit wasting your time.
Btw...it'll be a year in October and it's a very happy relationship. He still makes me giddy and he still seems content with his decision to tie me down...or 'let him' 'keep me' as he sweetly phrases it.
With me, a few dates usually came before exclusivity. We wanted to know if we were compatible, if we enjoyed each others' company. If we wanted to continue seeing each other, we decided on exclusivity then.