Why do guys wait so long to text back?

Question says it all.. One minute they'll be texting you right away, two texts later they wait hours!

Ex: My boyfriend was txting me that he was cooking dinner, so I asked what he was making and if he wanted to come over to my place for dinner tomorrow and I still haven't heard from him :/ That was about 4 hrs ago...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Wait half hour then text back with another text saying, " I take your silence as a negative response, OK no worries" then watch them reply quicker in the future lol,x

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What Guys Said 8

  • Just venturing a guess, but I'm gonna go out on a limb and assume the reason he didn't get back to you right away was because he was busy doing something. Perhaps he was cooking. Perhaps he was... y'know... busy... cooking. As for what happened after that is anyone's guess. I'm gonna assume that he got busy cooking, then eating, then got sidetracked by other things, and didn't think to text back right away.

    This can happen. This is the nature of text based communication. You can focus on your phone 24/7 and answer all the damned time, right away, every time, or you can live life, do things, and get back leisurely enough. If you want a complete conversation, try using a phone as an actual phone, or if he's taking too long, like four hours, I don't think you're completely out of line texting him again.

    Whatever the case, I think what happened is pretty obvious, and he probably just got sidetracked. Noting to freak out about. Nothing to take personal. (Not that I'm implying you're doing either.) Just wait it out, call him back, or text him again. Your choice. If you really see this as a problem, why don't you bring it up with him sometime, and maybe try to hash it out. If it's not important enough to talk to him about it, I scarcely see why it matters then.

    Does that make sense?

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  • Sometimes if I'm doing something, or about to do something, and notice a text message, I ignore it until I'm done. The reason being that I think its better to wait a while and get consistent texts than to get periodical texts throughout the day and worry about awkwardly picking up a conversation from a few hours ago.

    Be patient, it sucks, but understand that people have their own individual lives. You are a part of it, definitely, but other things like family, needs, and school need to also find its place.

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  • Because it's a text. Texting is not having a conversation. There's no sense of urgency. It's all about convenience. You want a conversation, PICK UP THE PHONE AND TALK.

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  • Sometimes I just forget and get busy with something. I don't understand why some people intentionally wait to respond though, that's just stupid.

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  • I'll be the third guy to say it here. Maybe he was just busy, and had stuff to do. Maybe he lost track of time. Maybe he was sidetracked. You said it yourself, he was cooking, right?

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  • usually it's either just that something came up, or that they just can't think of anything to say. I'd rather wait to respond something good than juts send a text to send a text.

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  • girls do the same thing don't they. don't girls respond a little slower than guys to make it seem like they're not too interested?

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  • I was once hanging out with a girl (soon to be my ex -gf). At that particular moment we were accidentally hanging out, no intention for more.

    Some guy was hitting on her. She liked him for a while but finally she rejected him (they went only once out - this is what she told me).

    Long story short: They were texting and he was texting back right away. Did you know what she told me: "What a looser. He's so needy, look how he's texting be back only after several seconds! "

    PS: I know, I made a mistake going out and being with her. I should have seen it, but I learned it the hard way :)

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What Girls Said 7

  • Sometimes it means he's not a big texter, sometimes he's busy with other things and sometimes it could be he forgets texts and might drop off a conversation not knowing you're waiting for a response.

    I'm not a big texter myself. I might instant message a ton online, but I don't text all that much on my phone. It feels like being on a tether. Your guy may prefer seeing you in person or talking to you shortly on the phone. Ask him what style of communication he likes best and be sure to tell him which style you like best so you two can meet on some common ground.

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  • Because they don't care. Not like girls do, anyway. They have more important things to do in their life than respond to words on a screen.

    Believe me, my boyfriend is the same way :p

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    • No offense, but some girls can be pretty crazy about it too. A guy can say "I'm driving" then blowing up the phone with things like "why aren't you responding?". DRIVING! Do you want to pay the ticket he gets while driving?

    • I've actually heard about girls like that. Kinda makes me glad I don't keep a cell phone. Makes me glad my girlfriend doesn't have a cell phone, too, but then again, my girlfriend is one of the sane ones.

    • I'm not crazy about it. So why would I be offended? My friend is psycho about it if her guy doesn't text her. She's like, "I haven't heard from ___in an hour! What the hell?!" And I'm just like, "I haven't heard from ____ in like five hours." It really doesn't bother me. He'll get to it when he gets to it. Unless it's important. Then I usually follow up an hour later with a phone call.

  • call him

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  • Guys can't multitask, which includes having multiple thoughts in their head. So if they're busy at work, they won't have time to think about you. So they forget to text you and it takes a while for them to realize that they haven't. Sometimes they even think they sent you a text, when they haven't. Then it takes an even longer time for him to realize that he didn't send you anything.

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  • Busyness.

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  • Boys! grrr Love em but hate em..

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  • I've had similar issues with texting guys before.

    What I learned -

    One guy just didn't like to text. He never told me that until I finally confronted him about his delayed responses and no responses.

    A couple of the guys just didn't care to talk to me as much as I thought they did. They were either annoyed or just wanted some time on their own, so they only responded when they wanted to, which is one of the pluses to texting, actually.

    And of course, sometimes people just get busy. And often times, when people get busy or preoccupied with other things, they forget they even got a text until they end up going through their phone later, or until they hear from you again.

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