How to be flirty during a date?

So, I'm terrible at being flirty during dates. I have no problem being funny or carrying on a conversation but I never feel like I'm being particularly flirty and I have no idea how to initiate physical contact. Any advice?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I like when a guy puts his hand on the small of back. Kind of guiding/protecting me on a first date. The hand on the leg can be tricky, for me at least, I can't explain it well. One guy did it and I knew he only wanted sex. Another guy did it and I knew he just wanted to show affection. I'm guessing the conversation was different. Like sex guy wasn't really listening and the other guy was entranced with the conversation. Holding hands is good a couple of dates in.

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What Girls Said 9

  • anonymous guy below is such a loser, always writing that girls won't go for you if you aren't good looking. Guess what? I bet his standards are model-type girls, whereas he is a super hairy creep with huge beer belly and face full of pimples. I mean, if you continuously whine on GAG, there's something wrong with your head, dude.

    Now I'm done bashing loser dude. To your question:

    I'm terrible at flirting myself, or even reciprocating the flirting the guy does. Some moves that guys have done to me that I think was pretty smooth was the touching knees, or accidentally brushing hands. Fleeting touches are fun. Or comment on something on her hand, on the jewelry she wears, so you'll have a chance to touch her hand without it being so very obvious. Maybe compliment her bracelet, ask her where she got it, saying you're looking for a birthday gift for your sister. Then ask whether you can take a closer look, and when she says yes, take her hand.

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    • lol you've been giving me my biggest laughs lately thanks. Are you the same girl who always calls guys out anonymously?

  • Dig into your interests. Say something like, "Ive been told I give pretty great massages and most any girl would say really prove it." Or if you play an instrument and you get on that convo be like it really helps to have big hands and then put your hand up to try and compare them. Another easy thing to do is when handing something to her like change or something small, palm it into her hand like fully touch her hand. Don't be shy and try not to touch her hand. It sounds weird but its small things that I look for. Or if you just go shopping together, go over to maybe a rack of scarves and pick out and talk about different ones. If you find one that you think she might like pick it up and say but I think you would look really good in this. You could do this with other clothing but I find it weird because lots of things factor into clothing like the size of the clothing and the shape of the girl. But scarves are perfect because most any girl can wear them to accessorize AND they don't require a size. Easy gift*** hope I helped a little bit!

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  • I agree with Turtleluv, just wanted to add something: if you try, say, to put your arm around her shoulders, just do it confidently. It feels great to be wanted and protected, but it's terrible to feel that moment of uncertainty when the guy starts a move, then stops, then goes trembling for it again... If you want to try something, do it softly but confidently ;)

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  • For me, you don't really have to be flirty. It's just how you express yourself and how well you can connect with this girl. If you want an emotional relationship, be classy and don't sell yourself too short.

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  • Slightly touch her hand/arm and take it from there

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  • Tease her if conversation is easy for you. Teasing is also a form of flirting

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  • Be spontanous try to feel relaxed and confident . Try to be interested in her and listen to her .

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  • Honestly, I don't think I'm much of a flirt myself, I just be myself and make them laugh. Sometimes it's too obvious when someone is flirting and there's always the possibility they don't fall in love with you, but flirty you. I'd say don't worry about flirting, be yourself and if she doesn't like you for you then it's her loss.

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What Guys Said 3

  • -Eye contact : I find this to be the most important, looking away too often is going to make her think you're not that interested.

    -Touch : this is common flirting and all you need to do is touch the back of her hand when you guys laugh about a joke (etc ...), her upper back when you're moving through a dense crowd to make her feel safe.

    -Chivalry: Yes, it's not dead, DON'T listen to all those "dating guru" bellends that think they know women inside out. Hold her hand crossing roads, pull her chair out for her to sit in it when at a restaurant, etc ...

    But do all these in moderation! No girl wants to be drowned in all this, trust me!

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  • Make sure she is talking about 75% of the time. Let her lead the conversation, but you yourself have to lead and steer her emotionally.

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  • be good looking

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