How can you get over the mistakes you've made in love?

Growing up, I never had much experience dating guys, nor anyone to teach me. I learned by messing up. (But was never a whore) After graduating high school, I had dated one guy and I was inexperienced in love & dating. I was only 18 and he was 26. In general, I am mature for my age--even when I was 18, yet obviously not as mature as I am now. I feel I've grown a lot as a person in the past 2 years. (I'm 20) Anyways, this guy would call and text me, and took me on one date. After that one date, he never spoke to me again. I felt embarrassed and stupid because I really liked this guy, yet felt that first impression of me ruined my chances with him. I know a lot more now, yet it's too late & I always think I should have done/said things differently at the time. Recently, I went to an event which we bumped into each other at. I looked great, and hoped he would be interested again after seeing me, hoping I would have another chance to prove I am better than the first impression he got of me. Yet, no call or text. I feel like crying, yet can't get over the sadness of my mistakes ruining my chances. How can I just move on from this feeling?


0|0
3|4

Most Helpful Guy

  • Don't beat yourself too hard. I remember being that nervous too and dorking out. I'm not saying you dorked out; that's just what I did. Of course he doesn't really know you as a person to reject you, but it seems he didn't feel enough of a connection with the impression he got. Was there anything you talked about that might have turned him off?

    The best way to move on is to flirt and go out with other men. With more exposure to guys, you will better get over your anxiety. It would really be great if you had a girlfriend or two to show you some of the ropes.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I think he just wanted to see if I was naive enough to have sex with him, he always sweet talked me, but never backed it up with his actions. I've had guys who have just wanted me for sex turn around and fall for me after getting to know me, but I feel like I liked him so much that I dorked out ha ha and he didn't get to see the side of me everyone knows and loves. How can I kinda stop beating myself up over this? I only got one date ...

What Guys Said 3

  • I'm sorry if he were just after you for sex. As you know, he's not worth it if that's the case.

    It's always hard to get over someone you had high hopes for. To move on, you have to acknowledge all your hurt feelings and cry if that's what you feel like doing. Obviously, you can do this in private. Ask yourself what hurts or saddens you the most about this incident. Then, think about how you're going to handle getting over these feelings.

    Some hints about handling this are realizing you are a fallible human being, and as such, will make mistakes; listing your good and successful qualities; exercise if you don't do so already; analyzing if this guy reminds you of someone you know; coming up with a game plan for the future when you go out on a date with a guy like but NOT beating yourself up if you make a dork of yourself.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Youre right. Thanks! Have a good one

  • It was just one date...

    0|0
    1|0
  • You are being way to self critical about this.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 3

  • Only time will heal your wounds

    0|0
    0|0
  • Just distract yourself, it is his lost honey.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I know how you feel- threefold. no, actually it was four guys that this has happened with. Shy, younger me liked what I saw but didn't have the courage to say it, so I was always giving off a lot of mixed signals/not making good first impressions and not getting into the relationships like I wanted to. I say embrace new, 2 years older yet sexier you, and find a new man. The past is the past, and you will gain nothing from idolizing or throwing yourself at this guy. It's hard to move on and I hate that I've made these similar mistakes too, but we are both wiser now. So use the past as a learning tool and focus you energy on finding, or appreciating your man :)

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...