So, it went well at the start - we seemed to have a lot in common and truly got on as people. I felt very secure and comfortable with him and we saw a lot of each other. He took me on quite a few dates and paid for several very nice dinners in posh restaurants. He was extremely supportive about a certain family situation I am going through.
But slowly things started to creep in, a slightly patronizing attitude, but I just put that down to teasing. I could tell he wasn't majorly experienced with women because he didn't try to kiss me at all on the first 3 dates.
After a lot of alcohol, we were first in bed together, he told me that I was the perfect girl for him and he loved me. Yet he had felt too intimidated by me to kiss me. He asked me if I could see me and him being together in a relationship, and said it pained him to think of me sleeping with another man.
Anyway, my friend who had been talking to him at the party we were at that night had been talking to him about his views on things, and he told him when he was very drunk:
"I don't care about the politics mate, I'm trying to sleep with her."
When another male friend of mine was talking about how much he was in love with this girl, he said:
"Just dominate her."
I pulled him up on both of these things, and he said he had no recollection of talking to the first friend but was absolutely drunk out of his brains.
He said he had been trying to sleep with me that night, as we'd dated for a while and not done anything sexual, but obviously he had deep emotional feelings for me, but sex had been on his brain and obviously he wants me physically as well as emotionally, as we've dated a couple of months and not had sex.
He said he was willing to wait, but when he was drunk, it had just come out what he was thinking. We didn't have sex that night and to be fair to him, he didn't overtly pressure me, and gave me the money to get home in the morning and was fine on the next date.
He said he wasn't very emotionally intelligent (despite his academic intellect) and when I'd said that after those comments I'd pretty much ruled him out as a potential boyfriend, a couple of tears rolled down his face.
Anyway, since then I lost my job. I am quite a bit behind career-wise, compared to him.
We both attended good universities, but he ended up becoming a broker, along with another high-paying job and is very financially well off.
I've had to do bar-work to supplement my income (his family has money - mine does not) and it made me feel a bit insecure.
My confidence took a bit of a knock and I was flat out trying to get another job. I hadn't been in contact with him very frequently, but told him in advance this might be the case and apologized, and I also arranged to meet him. (I never didn't text him back for more than 2 days).
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One night a week before that he sent me a couple of texts that were all over the place (bad spelling, punctuation etc) and seemed to imply he was drunk because he normally texts more perfect than anyone I know, yet when I asked him if he had gone out drinking the next day (not that I'd mind, I'm the most laid back woman in the world when it comes to stuff like that), he said he "hadn't really gone out" and his reply had been due to his "fat fingers".
I found this strange and suspicious. It clearly wasn't that. I wasn't upset at all by the fact that he'd been drinking or if he had gone out - so what - but that he was being shifty about it - he is the most articulate person by text I have met, fat fingers is the worst excuse ever.