I met this guy about three months ago. We hit it off great and talked (texted) every day (called once in while) for the last two and a half months. He was in the military and just came home this past week.
While he was away, he always said good morning gorgeous, would say I can’t wait to see you, I wish I was there with you, I miss you. He seemed pretty genuine based on his past relationships that he told me about.
About three weeks ago he has been acting very distant. Hardly responds to texts, has told me that, “the more I text him when he doesn’t respond, the longer he waits and doesn’t want to respond.” I know he was busy getting ready to come home, too.
I can be very pressing at times because I hate being ignored. It is something that sets me from 0-60 in seconds. I told him, I hate when people purposefully ignore me. It is something that hurts more than anything.
Now, I may have overreacted and sent multiple messages like 2-3 the last three days, just trying to fix things or figure out where I stand. I tried to make amends and apologize, but he hasn’t responded. I am worried and just want to fix it. I know I should have just let him have his space, and I know I messed up, but I’m hurt by the ignoring act.
Just how bad did I mess up? Is there anything I can do or say to fix this? How long will he stay mad at me?
I miss him and just want to go back to how things were when we met.
If anyone has any advice or experience, please share.
Most Helpful Girl
He's already told you, point-blank, what he's thinking: basically, "I don't like it when you text so much or demand an immediate response." That sounds like he's being fairly clear and direct about what he wants and doesn't want... and especially for a guy ;-)
Could you try to listen to *his* advice and back off a bit? I know that you hate being ignored (I hate it too,) but a big part of dating is being able to be patient and collected even if you aren't getting the attention you want, when you want it. Listening to the other person is also a very important part of dating... so if he's telling you that he'll actually wait LONGER when you're being pushy, well, you can either listen to him and give him some time to respond, or keep doing the exact thing he doesn't like and push him away.
I wouldn't worry so much about "fixing" anything, since it doesn't sound like you did anything wrong that needs to be addressed. I really think if you let it be for a few days, do your own thing and don't text him or pressure him, and TRUST that you WILL hear from him again, it will all turn out okay.