Should I make guys work harder for the first date?

I used to be very standoffish and not go on dates very much, but I always had guys interested. Now, I want to experience the "dating" life and really meet someone special. So I've worked hard and opened myself up a lot. I'm a lot sweeter, easier to get to know, and if I like a guy I'll say yes easily when he asks for a date (whereas before I'd get too scared and make up an excuse).

However NOW that I'm doing this? Guys seem less interested. They'll text me less and rarely ask me on a second date. They'll still act interested a bit, but never as much as they were before. I'm thinking I should be playing hard to get like I used to, because I always had guys around when I was doing that.

What do you guys think?


Most Helpful Guy

  • No, that's stupid... and solves nothing. You'd still end up with jerks getting through and you'd probably scare off some nice guys. Plus as far as attention goes, it happens... it doesn't matter what you do, there are days when no one will show interest and other days when people are falling over themselves, it's not an attitude thing.


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What Guys Said 3

  • Maybe guys are hoping YOU will be a special someone,and if you're dating a lot of different guys, they figure you're not looking for any one special person. They think you just want to have fun. There's nothing wrong with that, but a lot of guys are going to back away from a second date, since you are going out with someone else, and it won't go anywhere.

    • I'm never dating two guys at once. I just meet guys pretty often so when one drops off the Earth, or continues to text me for a month after but not ask me on another date, I go out with someone else. That's the weirdest part of it actually, they all still talk to me. They just won't ask for another date.

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    • Ok then its nothing I've done or can possibly fix. Thanks for your time.

    • Afraid that you're right!

      Remember me for BA!

  • No offense, but this gets asked on here a lot, and I currently do not feel like taking the type to explain this asinine, illogical myth again. So, at least for now, I'll just say that it's all in your head.

  • I usually go on a 1st date with a tape measure and a shovel.

    • Lol

    • If Gag had worst answer I would be begging for it!

What Girls Said 2

  • I think you should stop playing games altogether and just try to be yourself for a change. If you play hard to get, guys will often think you're just not interested, and if you force yourself to be cheery, sweeter and that kind of things, and that's not really you, it's actually easy to tell if someone's faking it, so you might come off as someone who tries too hard and is fake.

  • You should definitely play hard to get. It makes guys more interested in you. They usually kinda like it. That's why they aren't talking to you as much, cause if you aren't playing hard to get and just saying yes right when they ask you on a date they get bored or something.