My boyfriend and I been dating for 4 yrs, it's been difficult because of our work schedules but we made the efforts to at least see each other one to 2 days a week. He's very close to his mother and appx 3 weeks ago she became very ill and admitted into icu, she coded twice. He wasn't reaching out as much, and I offered to be there and offered support.. I was upset that he excluded me, and wouldn't response. After 5 days of texting him messages I asked to let me know something something, that this was also taking a toll on me. Finally he's response and said " babe I apologize but I'm a mess right now going through something and then you get mad at me I could not handle it. I will reach out for you. I love you." That the last time I heard from him. I'm taking this very hard because I took this as his way of break up. I'm confuse do I wait? Or reach out.. by the way I haven't reached out to him.
Most Helpful Guy
Men are weird when it comes to medical issues. I recommend that you take it down a notch and try to put yourself in his shoes. What could you use in that situation to help make it through from day to day in the Hospital (people don't often eat when they are upset). ME? I died 367-days ago. It was remarkable because I went to the hospital to be present for my father, who was having a pancreatic procedure which was going to keep him in the Hosp a few days. I actually considered going the next day, after he had been admitted and had the surgery (yup, selfish). While in the Waiting Room, I suffered a myocardial infarction (my heart stopped beating due to a blockage without prior warning/symptoms, although my blood pressure was surely high). They tried an angioplasty, but nearly blew out the artery. So, I ended up with a quintuple bypass operation that saved my life and I walked out of the hospital on my own power 12-days later. PHEW! My father has been fine, and his diabetes has been fine (his pancreas had swollen due to some medication he was on). Anyway: Guys tend to handle family medical emergencies strangely, particularly for their mothers. The best thing you could do is simply be there for him (I"m not talking about vcmls, emails, or text msgs). If you want to win his heart, be there for his Mom and him! This is a golden opportunity to make this ONE impression! Don't blow it! Buy a small bouquette of flowers with a card, bring them to the Hospital for his mother's room, and bring HIM something to eat (if he has a favorite sandwich / sub place, go there and pick up his favortie!). Do not announce that you are doing any of this. Just DO IT, and show up. Don't plan on camping out at the Hospital, probably spend like an hour or so there so he knows you care. Do it again a day later. Hopefully, her condition will improve and she'll be released soon. He does not need or want someone who is NEEDY at this time. He has enough going-on sitting there next to his mother. Don't get in the way of the family, and if there is someone there that upsets you - (like an ex-girlfriend who might be close to his Mom) - just suck it up and be supportive with a supportive smile (he will appreciate your efforts, and he will later be drawn to the amount of empathy that you felt for him while he was going through a Trying Time). Don't get 'underfoot' or be a bother, just give him a hug and let him sit and stare at his mom. He will remember what you have done for him for a LONG ... LONG ... TIME! :-)0