Girls, what advices did your dad and (especially) your mother gave you when it comes to dating/ guys?

Girls, what advices did your dad and (especially) your mother gave you when it comes to dating/ guys?

Updates:
Do you also follow your parents' advices?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Some advice I've gotten from my parents and a few of my own that I'll pass down to my future kids;

    - Watch how a man treats/talks about his family. It's an indicator of how he'll treat you in the future, if you plan to start a family with him.

    - Don't judge a man by his success or current status but rather his character. Life has its ups and downs so it's better to regard whether he is ambitious, hardworking, resilient and adaptable which are keys to success. You know that guy will successful in the future.

    - A man should respect you at all times, not place you on a pedestal or create an illusion of you which is his ideal. He should see you for you and accept who you are.

    - Don't date if you think it will fulfill you. You should be comfortable and confident being single, have your own life and strong values. Let the guy be an addition to your life rather than a necessity.

    - Your other half should bring out the best in you.

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What Girls Said 33

  • They both gave me this advice when I was like 13ish. So I was too young, but they just had to say their piece once.

    My dad: You have a good head on your shoulders. Use it. You don't have to take crap from them. You're better than that. If they disrespect you or put you down that's not love. That's not a man. Men respect their women.

    My mom: Guys are morons. Avoid them as long as possible (lol). They never grow up. This is evident by your father. Find yourself a good man who treats you right and do right by him. No need to sell yourself short for a guy. It's better to be alone than be with a guy who treats you poorly.

    My parents never really gave advice...mostly because I never asked. They more so led by example and somehow managed to raise me in a way that they didn't need to address guys with me so much when I reached "that age." I already knew from when I was really young what I would and would not put up with in a guy. Both my parents just stressed the importance of not being a doormat. That helps in life in general not just in dating.

    I don't remember exactly what they both said but I remember the gist of it. And they've been married to each other for going on 24 years so I would assume that whatever set up they have is working (even though my mom always says my dad is a 57 year old kid :p).

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    • I followed it, I guess. Whenever I didn't it always managed to come back and bite me in the ass lol. Funny how that works.

  • My dad didn't say anything helpful. He just told me to be careful about hanging out with guy friends because apparently guys talk and "embellish" a bit and my dad didn't want me getting a reputation lol. He also said that a guy who hurts a woman is not a real man, which I found humorous because my dad was borderline abusive to me growing up.

    My mom told me a few things. She said I need to be very direct with guys because they don't pick up on subtle hints. She said to make sure I have my own career so I'm never dependent on a man. And she said that I need to marry a "smart, hardworking man."

    She also told me - when I was 13 - that if I ever wanted to have sex, that I should tell her first so that she could get me birth control. Hahaha and I ended up deciding to wait until marriage.

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    • Also, my accounting teacher in high school gave me advice when it comes to being proposed to: "If you have to think about it, then your answer should be no."

  • Growing up, my dad always told me that I wasn't allowed to date until I was married. Then when I was a teenager, he told me that guys only want one thing; to which I responded with "candy?"

    My mom never really said much of anything, unfortunately.

    Tips & tidbits that I personally find useful and would like to assume my mom would have told me:

    - Don't be afraid to go after what you want.

    - Know when to leave a relationship that's hurting you.

    - If you love someone, don't worry about what the rest of the world thinks.

    - Just be yourself. Because you're brilliant.

    - Seek respect, not attention. It last longer.

    - Don't ever let them hold you down.

    - A person who is nice to you but not nice to the waiter is not a nice person.

    - Love should be a challenge. Not one that you feel you can never win but one that makes you a better person. One that puts a smile on your face as you try and figure it out.

    Of course, most of those go for just about anything in life, though.

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    • The things you said are deep. I really like the one "A person who is nice to you but not nice to the waiter is not a nice person." So true!

      Thanks for the advice!

    • No problem! I've always loved that one.

  • I actually got more dating advice from my brothers than from my parents. I guess I sought it from them more because they are guys and they could screen the douche bags for me, lol. My oldest brother said that any guy who takes me out should be more afraid of him than of my dad, haha.

    But in terms of my parents, they never said much. My dad knows that I have good judgment and wouldn't be going out with someone from the wrong crowd, or "bad boys" or anything. My mom always told me if I got into a relationship with a guy, that if he didn't propose after two years of dating then he would never do it (LMAO!) I don't know where she got that idea from.

    Now my parents just give me marriage advice since I'm headed in that direction. While I'd love for my marriage to be like theirs, my relationship is different so I just cherry pick from the advice they give me.

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  • My dad has never given me advice on anything, he's a... different kind of person. My mom, though has always told me never to rely on a man and my first priority in life should always be myself (my dad left her high and dry so I can understand where she comes from). "It's not selfish if it's the right thing to do for you, because in the end boys and friends come and go but you're always stuck with yourself."

    She also has been known to say "If you ever think you're getting serious with someone, check out how they treat their mother. Most of the time, that is how they'll be treating you in the future."

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  • No advice was ever given from either one of my parents but when I first went on a blind date several years ago - my dad followed me by car to the date I was going to and then watched me for one hour. The guy who was dating me felt guilty but I knew that if I didn't force him to accept that I can live my own life he never would. My parents also have a rule that only university students (and from the same school as me) are allowed to visit my house so when I invite people over, I ask them to show my parents their student card.

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  • Neither my mum nor my dad told me anything about dating. Never really wanted them to, either. But not even having them try is also quite...odd.

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  • A lot things.

    - Don't let guys touch you

    - Always be and love yourself Because if you don't love yourself why would others love you.

    - If you don't want something say "NO"

    - Get respect from a guy, Not only attention

    - Respect yourself and your body and don't give it away easy.

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  • My parents never gave me much advice. My mom just didn't know what to tell me, and my dad feels too awkward to say much. He did tell me, right before I went on my first date, "Don't be stupid. And bring pepper spray."

    But beyond that, we've never talked about it. They know I date, and they just trust that I'm making good decisions.

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  • My mom always told me these 2 things:

    1. have your own income. Never be completely dependent on your husband. You have to be able to do things on your own, have at least a little bit of money that's yours so that you don't have to ask your husband for everything

    2. Find a man with a great sense of responsibility. This kind of man will do his best to take care of his family, even if he doesn't earn much.

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    • ...your family is all about money, aren't they?

    • ...right. Now go to bed, it's late and you're not thinking straight =)

  • don't fall in love. and if you do don't let him know. because when a person knows you aren't going anywhere they know they can treat you wrong.

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  • My dad didn't give me much advice. He isn't one for gossip and flirting. The only thing he told me was to be careful, in case some guys are mental. My mother gave me a lot of advice, most of it being useless or unrealistic. She pretty much fears that every guy will try and rape me. This is weird, especially considering that she has never been sexually harassed, so she shouldn't be so paranoid of those things. She also constantly tells me to get a boyfriend as soon as possible. I suspect this is to compensate for her midlife crisis.

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  • Lol! The only advise given to me that I wish I had followed: Dump Him. Very simple, straight forward, logical and unemotional. This advice was the only thing I got if I ever complained about a relationship.

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  • -Be with someone who brings out your happiness and talents.

    -Watch how he treats his family and friends.

    -Find someone motivated to achieve goals because it also encourages you to be motivated.

    -Don't date because you want a boyfriend. Date someone because you want HIM to be your boyfriend.

    -Never settle.

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  • Treat them how you want to be treated, and expect the same back. Never settle, and never rely on anyone. Have your own career, always make sure you can take care of yourself, have something for yourself. If he lays a hand on you, well, he better go into hiding. Be you and never lose yourself. Be happy. That's all that matter at the end of the. Live with no regrets.

    I love my parents . :-)

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  • They didn't really give me advice besides to say 'Don't get pregnant before you're ready', which they really do Not need to worry about that. I'm keeping that to myself O.o

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  • That if he already has a condom ready in his pocket and it's only the first few times you guys have gone out together, he's probably not worth it

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  • My mother told me I need to see what else is out there while I had my first serious relationship. She was right.

    I've had little to no other advice from either parent. We aren't really the type of family to discuss that sorta thing.

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  • Not to let them take advantage of me

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  • Well my mother said: If you like him,be friends with him and see where it goes.

    And my dad said: STAY AWAY FROM BOYS...

    I usually follow my moms' advice :P

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  • don't let them touch you. beware of boys who try to pressure you.

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  • dont remember them giving any advice

    only know they didn't like me in a relationship when I was in school

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  • My dad always told me to never trust anyone

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  • I didn't get any advice

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  • Find one like your dad is.

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  • from mum: guys only want one thing, dun let them taking advantage, dun date around until marriage

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  • Until my 16th birthday: keep your knickers on. After that: use a condom.

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  • "become a nun"

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  • None! At best my mom goes around saying men arnt worth it, meanwhile using them to get her way all the time. She has the worst taste in men then you could possibly believe. I think she watched too much "Breakfast Club" when she was younger. At best she taught me not to be like her. My uncle however once told me "don't wait until your married to have sex" haha, I love him?�

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  • My dad gave me a quarter and said put this between your knee's and don't drop it. lmao

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  • More from Girls
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What Guys Said 1

  • None,

    like Tabra I didn't get any advice; still ain't getting any. I wish though I had been informed that girls give flirting signals and are too much of a pu--y to approach guys they like and so they just send signals; I never knew about them until a few years ago when I read about them and started observing them.

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