What a confusing Pickle! Should I keep at it or let it go?

Bare with me, it may be long. I started talking to a guy I met on a dating site about two months ago. And we have gone on several dates for about a month and a half. Things started out great. We had much in common and seemed to have quite the spark from the beginning. He would text often and wake me up to cute good morning texts. And for the first couple of weeks it went splendid. Then one day I decided to read our first messages to each other from the dating site and saw that he was online. And though I tried not to think about it, it did strike a bad chord with me. So every now and then I started to have the habit of checking if he was online, which in more cases then not, he was. Then more and more, I started to notice he was getting still getting texts from other women by the names that popped up on his screen. Now some I knew were his siblings, but getting a text at 2am when we are at a bar (which he does reply to) seems a bit strange and was more off putting. I don't mind if a guy talks to other women when I'm just casually dating him, but when its been several weeks... yikes. Normally I would have just let the relationship fade off. (No need to pursue someone who doesn't pursue you.) Yet, he would always ask to hang out, set up dates, and I even met some of his family. I got to know him even more and started to really fall. So I got up the nerve and asked to go exclusive... Well it didn't go over too well. He said he wasn't quite ready (his last girlfriend had cheated on him), but he still wanted to hang and see where it went. Now though I could understand his reasoning, I couldn't help but also take it as "he just doesn't want you," and because of that I am not myself. I watch every move I make and just became a nervous wreak (which is not normal) Which has caused more tension in the relationship. He says he is not sure how to act around me now and no longer texts as often. When we do go out, sometimes he is really there and fun and passionate, and the next so distant... (which was never the case at first) Yet, he still wants to spend his birthday with me as well as have me meet more of his friends. But I can't help but feel the relationship is being forced and even through soical media its odd. Say it's just the two of us at a place, he will check in where he is with a status, but no mention of me. Or when I tag him in a pic, he has to approve it through Facebook first (privacy setting), yet only does it when I ask about it. What on earth is going on? I'm so confused! One minute it seems he wants me and is telling me I'm amazing and he is crazy for me, kissing me any chance he gets, and the next I don't hear from him, or he seems like he just can't be himself. I miss how it was before, but I suppose me asking to be exclusive may have rubbed him the wrong way. Should I keep at it and give it perhaps a month? Or just stop it now? I want to be treated right. I don't want to be punished because I wanted a true relationship between us.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think you should make a stand. You know what you want so tell him to give you it or you're going to have to go and find someone else who will... there is no need to torture yourself by way of 1000 cuts. It's better just to make it one deep gash and get it out of the way.

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What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Girls Said 2

  • Why don't you spend some more time dating other people and not focusing on him?

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  • Anything confusing you should let go.

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