Girls... please help me.. I can't mess this up.. please?

Okay I'm 17 and I met this girl and we have been hanging out for a few months and we have kissed and stuff. I really like her and she says she likes me.. but I feel like I'm way to obsessed. She is like all I can think about. We text most of the day but I always text her first. And when she's not replying fast or they are just one word replys I panic and think something is wrong or I did something. I always want to talk to her and I'm driving myself crazy.. I always tell her how happy she makes me and stuff. She sometimes says she has to go for whatever reason and stuff but I always make sure that I text her no matter what and I reply fast.. why doesn't she worry about that stuff? I wanna be like that.. I feel clingy.. what do I do? I really like this girl... we are both 17 by the way


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Most Helpful Girl

  • awe puppy love... first off girls rather the guy does most of the work because it looks and feels horrible when a girl is seen as the chaser (it's usually the male role). with that said you've made her comfortable, she knows how you feel so she never has to worry if you'll reach out to her or if you like her because you always will and always do,... she's not at the least bit worried that you will go away so she is able to focus on other things unlike yourself... try to control yourself and take a step back for 3 or so days not contacting her, see if she contacts you I'm sure she will... although my ex was always the one contacting me, and I absolutely adored him... Eventually this bothered him and he would hate when I would miss a call or take a long time to reply because I literally wasn't near my phone... he actually went a day with out contacting me to see if I would, but I was so secure that I didn't even really notice... so he was upset with me the next day... I still adored him but it didn't change him being the one to call me... so give it at least two days... or just get a hobby because your letting her get to comfortable for your own emotional good

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What Girls Said 4

  • Alright. Well it doesn't seem like she's responded badly to your clingyness yet, but I really recommend for your sake that you chill out a bit- or a lot. If she were to ever not be in your life you don't want that devastating your poor innocent soul to the millionth degree. What are your goals in life, what friends do you have, what things are you interested in? What was your life before she was there? Where do you imagine yourself 2, 5, 10 years from now? If your relationship with this girl is preventing you from having a LIFE then this isn't HEALTHY, buddy. Right now you're stuck in this little BUBBLE, this little world where she's the sun and you're rotating around her. You need to like switch out of that universe, dude. Relationships aren't supposed to suck up your life like that, especially at 17. In a few months from now you don't know what's going to happen, she might not be your SUN, and what would happen if the earth suddenly didn't have a SUN?!? WE WOULD ALL GO INTO CHAOS AND NOT LAST MORE THAN A FEW HOURS OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT (or was it a week, I'm not sure). Do you want to collapse in the chance that she would not be there for you?

    I don't think so.

    She is not a god, she is not a SUN, she is not your QUEEN that will chop off your head if you don't grovel at her feet, so what is the damn rush? (don't worry I'm not judging you because I've been there and done that - just trying to make you see things a bit more HEALTHILY so you don't end up in a depressed pile of shit when it all comes crashing down)

    There are tons of stuff in this world that you could be doing that will enrich your life just as much, or even MORE than talking to her will. So find those things, explore, enjoy life, and have her there to accompany you, rather than being the only thing in existence. Try to cut your amount of time talking to her in half, and always ask yourself "If she were to suddenly be zapped away what would my life look like without her? Is everything going okay for me? Do I still have friends? Do I still have goals? Do I still have a mind of my own? Am I a fat ass couch potato? Am I a nervous wreck? Or am I a strong-willed successful human being doing some good for the world?"

    Be loving, be yourself (if you have a "yourself" at this point), don't become a douche bag or try to "be a man" whatever the fuck that means. Just chill out and remember to always have a life outside of your relationships.

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  • Do not tell her you feel clingy. Women want a strong man that is not going to be so clingy and desperate. TO be honest you sound desperate and need to take a step back she knows you like her. Its completely normal you think about her all the time its puppy love and something new. But if you don’t give her some space and stop being for clingy and obsessed you won’t have her very long. Don’t be the first one to text let her text you first it will make a difference trust me..

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  • I think you should ask this question AGAIN but open it for the GUYS. The odds are some of them probably have been in your position and have good wisdom to give you as a man. You are young and hormonal so some of your behavior is understandable. However, sounds like you need to work on areas of self control and self worth. Look up articles online of self control and relationships. Also look up articles on self worth. It sounds as if you need her to complete you and that is not good because what would you do if she broke up with you one day?

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  • Cool your jets cowboy. Give yourself some space. As Shakespeare said " Therefore, love each other in moderation. That is the key to long-lasting love. Too fast is as bad as too slow."

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What Guys Said 3

  • The things you are doing will push her away quicker than otherwise.

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  • I was in the same position as you when I was in highschool relationships. In order to not have text anxiety, find something that you like to do. Play sports or volunteer or study. Activities that keep you busy and keep your mind focused.

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  • You are clingy. You need to pull back and reassert your masculinity or you'll lose her.

    I'll tell you now though, I don't think you'll be able to follow the advice. I think you'll continue to be clingy and drive her away. Most guys make this mistake around your age, and it takes the ruination of the relationship to really drive home the mistake and make sure we don't do it again.

    Start turning your phone off for several hours a day.

    Spend more time with your friends. If you don't have friends, GET SOME.

    Start having hobbies and interests outside the relationship. You have to have something interesting to talk about when you see her, so it's not a case of "What have you been up to lately?" "Since I saw you? Nothing, just texted you. And now I'm here with you. Basically, I have no life."

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