Does it seems like many girls have a very specific reason for dating?

I'm reading a lot of profiles online and it seems like many girls out there are looking for something way too specific. I'm not referring to "picky" necessarily but a certain "dream" of theirs.

Like a girl wants to be a stay at home mom and is looking for a guy who wants just that.

Or a girl looking for an "amazing first date" followed by a huge list of what that date will be. So she only wants a guy to fulfill that fantasy and take her to those places and share those experiences with her.

Or the famous "shopping list" where the guy must have followed by a list of anything ranging from living situations to his hairstyle even.

What do you make of such girls? Are other guys noticing this same thing? I feel like it's becoming more and more common now. Are there still plenty of girls who wouldn't mind just sitting over a cup of coffee and getting to know someone and seeing where it goes?


0|0
10|3

Most Helpful Girl

  • There's always specifics when you ask someone, especially girls, to tell you to list the particulars of what they want/are looking for (and dating sites are so bad when it come to that, I honestly think it brings out some of the most shallow, soulless parts of some people). What's in the 'shopping list' is usually way more than what they will actually be happy with, though. When it comes right down to it, half of it they probably don't even care about as much as they appear to. I've never known a girl in real life who minded having coffee and a chat with a guy she may be interested in.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 9

  • It's mostly like that online. When we read profiles, we can immediately determine what that person is like before the first date. So women are more picky on dating sites. In real life, no one walks around with a sign around their neck, so your standards can't apply before the first date. And when you do find out that the guy doesn't have everything you want, you have already fallen for him. So we tend to be much more picky online. One more reason to start dating in real life.

    1|1
    0|0
  • Interesting question. I certainly agree with some of the points made about online versus real life. There are so many more people who will view your online profile that you could ever meet in a given day. Imagine if all of the people who viewed your profile tried to start a conversation with you. This is why girls seem so "picky" online. When you're meeting someone in real life for the first time, you don't and can't expect to know anything about them at all. But online, there is a more logical approach because a lot of important things are just "laid out there". So, if vital information about this person is already out there... it's like a "pre-date" in a way, girls (or just people in general, really) can make sure things add up before they want to get to know that person more. These "shopping lists" are just a way to narrow down a bigger pool of potential dates than they would have normally in real life.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Girls with too many requirements will be disappointed

    0|0
    0|0
  • Wait a minute, doesn't everyone?

    0|0
    0|0
  • I think it's important to keep in mind what you want for yourself and your partner together instead of what one person wants out of another. For example, I want both of us to feel good about being ourselves when we are together. We shouldn't have to try and please each other or meet certain criteria to be happy together...it should just happen naturally.

    People who make such "shopping lists" don't really know what they want. They know what's attractive to them, but not what will make them happy.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes, you got it right on the nose.

    For example, I'm a virign and though I'm not neccasarily waiting for a virgin for my firrst time, I'm not giving it up anytime soon. Most guys have a problem with that so, oh well. (shrugs shoulders)

    Also, even though I am a virgin I'm pretty emotionally unattched. Comitted tonot comitting. I'm not sure why, I just am. So relationships aren't really my thing. As of now mingling, flirting, etc. But, if I tried a relationship I'd just grow tired of seeing the same guy day after day.

    Now tell me that's not picky.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes, it's true.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I blame the fairy tale books

    0|0
    0|0
  • i have a friend that has a "list" of things she wants from a guy and wants to go to fancy dinners and things. however I think it is nice I am more realistic, I don't really get dressed up that much and would be happy with just coffee and talking, the simpler the better.

    0|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 3

  • Yes, especially in online dating, most girls have an agenda, and usually an unrealistic one.

    But regardless off how realistic it is, a guy should think twice about any agenda a girl might have. probably it's mostly a secret from him, for one thing, and it means she will be trying from the get-go to manipulate the guy to fit her preconceived idea of what the relationship 'should' be.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I've noticed it and frankly, I'm sick of being treated like a cake instead of a person. We're people damn it, not a bunch of ingredients.

    And please stop treating us as a project you have to work on to "fix". What gives you the right to decide that our personality is somehow defective? Maybe we like who we are. So either accept us as the person we are or move along.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Girls I don't date. Take me for who I am, not who you want me to be. It's fine to have dreams of course but keep it realistic.

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...