Falls off the face of the earth, but still seems so into me, please help!

My co-worker and I have been talking for a couple of months now, he's been at my store for over a year but I really haven't noticed him until at a party another co-worker had. We exchanged numbers that night and we started texting, and at first it was pretty often that we would text. We would see each other at work and there was a lot of hugging, touching and kisses on the forehead. He would nearly pick me up off the ground when he would see me. There were lots of stares from him when we were in the same department, and he even had me be his wake up call one morning. I wanted to interact with him outside of work, and we have gone out to eat but generally with our co-workers. So this art exhibit came up, and I told him about it; He was so excited and was like he was totally down for going, and seemed anxious to go. So we planned a day, and the night before I saw him and he confirmed he would see me the next day. The next day comes, I text him to see when we would be meeting up, no answer. All day I didn't hear from him. So the next time I saw him he kept apologizing to me, and told me how he had overslept and he felt really bad. No big deal, I decided okay lets try to go another day.So we texted about it, once again he seemed really stoked on going. But again, same thing, he fell off the face of the earth. The next time I saw him he mentioned his text messaging isn't working, and how he felt bad, so he would call me to make plans. Okay. now this is the third time. I saw him at work, he seemed once again really excited, he apparently even researched the art exhibit and everything and he goes "When we get our schedules lets make a day we can both go, and I'm not going to make any excuses, I want to keep my word, I don't want to miss this." So when I go, okay text me, he goes "No, you text me!" ? Okay, So the schedule came out and I noticed we were both off Monday. I texted him casually and asked if he would be available. No response. it's been a day and a half so far. So I don't know how to feel. When we are together he's so affectionate, sweet, and accommodating. Granted I do know that a year went by and he did feel attraction towards me (because another male co-worker told me how he would say how beautiful he thought I was, but he never really made an effort to talk to me) I also know he is difficult to catch up with in general,and he also is younger than me. I'm 24 and he's 20 (I don't know if that makes a difference.) I don't get that he is "trying to play me" but It seems like every time we have a chance to hang out alone, he falls off the face of the earth. Any advice would be amazing!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It could be that he goes into panics every time that your time together draws near. If so, it would have been better if he came clean with you rather than make excuses. I find it really hard to believe that all three no shows are random bad luck. That he didn't get back to you the third time is a particularly bad sign. While it's possible he's playing games with you, I can't imagine what he could get out of that. All the same, it doesn't seem like a trend that will simply reverse itself soon. Whatever is causing it is probably a real problem of one kind or another that is likely to manifest in other ways as well. I admire your open-mindedness but I would suggest that you invest this in someone who is able to meet you at least partway.

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    • Thank you so much for your thoughtful answer! I was thinking along the same lines of your answer. I haven't been texting him, and he hasn't been texting me either but when I see him at work he comes in for a tight hug, we have all this chemistry, the other day I had the flu and I told him not to hug me (partially too because I was aggravated with the whole thing) and then he goes "I don't care" and hugs me even tighter, so I don't understand it. I guess I'll keep my options open.

    • Sounds like a good plan. He seems to be moving in that direction. And thanks!

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