What is the point of dating in America?

It seems like there is no point these days to even date. Most times in the dating world men have to do almost everything. And women don't have to do much of anything. There was a study that said that men are much happier just being single and women are lonelier than ever.

Most marriages end up in divorce these days so why even bother to date? Let’s all just stay single I say. What do you all think? I think the feminist movement is really destroying America and the dating world. We will all do better if we just have casual sex. With the type of society that we live in now marriage is a thing of the past. These days men and women are equal, and some cases women more so than men.

  • Is it worth being in a relationship?
    100% (4)71% (5)82% (9)Vote
  • It Isn't worth being in a relationship?
    0% (0)29% (2)18% (2)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
I just state that I have traditional values when it comes to dating. Not sure if men really take that to heart but I am happiest when it's more of a traditional, old school approach.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'll just state my reason for wanting a girlfriend here: I want my need for touch fulfilled and an opportunity to fulfill a woman's need for touch in return. Just Google "need for touch in adults" and you'll find plenty of articles explaining what I'm talking about. Most people tend to trivialize love, at least in my area. I don't trivialize love. I need someone who also does not trivialize love.

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    • I think that's why I posted this article, now that I think on it. I just want my need for touch fulfilled. Unfortunately for me, luck is not in my corner. That is why I do not see the point. The only women who ARE attracted to me are the *cough* cough* *SLOW* *cough* females.

What Girls Said 4

  • Do you even know what true feminism is? I really don't think you do. I know a lot of self-proclaimed "feminists" screw up the definition a bit but the whole freaking point in feminism is to make it 50/50 between men and women. True feminists typically discourage depending on a man to take care of everything for you. You just contradicted yourself when you said "men and women are equal" after saying you hate feminists.

    I do agree mostly with front2back's response on this; although, the 90/10 rule typically balances out after marriage or being together for more than 2.5 years and is not true for all relationships of course. I'm was bread winner in me and my boyfriend's relationship for a while I choose all the dates, paid for most things, and did most of the "work" while he was the 10%er at the time and gave me the footrubs and cooked for me. Now we're about 50/50 we both work and cater to each other although he brings in more than I do now

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  • You say that you have traditional values, yet you think casual sex is better.

    You're upset that women and men are equal so why date or get married?

    I notice that men who rant about things like this tend to be dissatisfied with their own lives, yet instead of trying to fix it and do better, they just rant about women and how dating sucks. How would you know dating sucks if you aren't dating? How can a man who can't make it past the initial approach say that men have to do everything? Make it past square one and then talk.

    You can't be miserable in your own life and then become angry with women because they sense that and choose not to deal with you. Again, men like this need to stop blaming women and take charge of their own lives. You don't live in a third world country founded on the caste system. you are lucky enough to live in America where you can change your life through your own choices.

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  • Love is worth all those bad things

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  • If you find your soulmate, dating is worth it.

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What Guys Said 9

  • "Most times in the dating world men have to do almost everything. And women don't have to do much of anything"

    That attitude, not only is it based on false hood and misunderstanding of what women have to do, (hint, it's not the same shit as men) but it's something which will make the formation of any successful relationship much harder.

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  • No men do not have to do everything. Relationships are a two way street. At first it may seem that way but as the relationship blossoms, it will be more equal. Hell, it may even start off that way or the women will be the one taking initiative in the beginning.

    By the way, these 'issues' aren't in just America. It's all over the world so don't pinpoint it to one country because a select few women you dated or couldn't get a date with or relationship started with didn't end up working out for you.

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    • @UPDATE: You need to find a girl who shares the same traditions and views as you do. It may be hard but there are a ton of women out there who share them.

  • What I find odd is that there seem to be these two parallel worlds right now, the 'dating' world where guys run around trying to do anything to impress women, and the FWB/hookup world where people don't date, just have sex, and 80% of the time the woman hopes for more.

    My guess is that women outnumber men in the FWB, but its hard for men to break into, which means more men are in the 'dating' world. In the dating world, men are pursuing women who are better looking then they are. In FWB land, guys sleep with girls who are not as hot as what they could date, though they may be pretty hot overall.

    I think if I were single, I'd probably aim for FWB and promote to relationship if appropriate. If I couldn't get FWB, I'd work on myself till I could, and FIX those problems. I think if you can't get casual sex, you're not gonna get as much relationship sex as you want even if you land a relationship.

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  • Let lay some super awesome life stuff on you. Fasten your seatbelt, you're going on a ride.

    There is the cool thing called the 90/10 rule for men in dating. Basically, if you are a man, you do 90% of the work in the beginning of the relationship. Let her know you like her first, ask her out first. Pay for the first date and a few subsequent ones. Buy her some gifts first and do things sexually and what not for her first. It's a lot of work, BUT after you do it she handles the 10%. This sounds unfair, but it's actually a huge payoff. She'll be so happy you've done everything for her, she'll take the wheel from there on. Women (believe it or not) enjoy returning the favor, sometimes double fold. This is good, especially if you are a man who likes getting BJs or back massages. Also, you'll have her love and care, which is awesome. I'm actually much happier now that I'm in a relationship than I ever was single. I have improved self-esteem and less anxiety. I did the 90% and now she makes me brownies and buys my winter formal tickets (In return for me taking her to an expensive movie and buying the homecoming tickets).

    The most marriages part is only 50% divorced and feminism has NOTHING to do with it. It's because couples get married to young, for the wrong reasons, in unstable relationships and with the wrong people. Also, some people are just not made for marriage. THAT'S why marriage divorce rates are up. I don't do casual sex and think it's stupid, but this is just my opinion. Humans can only bang for so many years until they don't want to bang or can't anymore. Guess what? Since they don't have a spouse and only slept around with others, they end up alone and without children. That's why I don't casual sex is a good idea. Marriage is NOT a thing of the past. They said marriage was a thing of the past 30 years ago when everyone was giving each other STDs in the 80's. A lot of people are still getting married to day and enjoy it.

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    • ^^This^^

    • Feminism has a lot to do with divorce. As soon as feminism takes hold of a country, no-fault divorce is introduced and divorce is de-stigmatised, divorce rates raise rapidly. As for people marrying too young, that used to be normal, and divorce was pretty much unheard of.

  • OK Well I'm gonna say you are just bitter right now. I mean by your opinion of dating "Why date if you just get divorced" I can say "Well why live if you're just going to die?" Yes the feminist movement is just full of bitter women who hate men but there are plenty of women who do not care for the feminist movement and are anti-feminist themselves. They'll destroy themselves eventually and/or become lesbians and isolate themselves. Who cares?

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  • If you find the right girl it's worth it. Luckily I did, but there aren't many out there. I can see why some guys would prefer to stay single. I can definitely see why more and more men are avoiding marriage (as I will be) with the way divorce courts are these days.

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  • It's all about luck and people don't understand that. They think its some type of 100% fool proof formula to get a woman but it all boils down to luck if you don't have money and/or looks.

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  • If you have no problems getting laid, then yeah, it's extremely difficult to find a woman that's worth settling down for.

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  • ur dating the wrong chicks I think!

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