I have always though that when someone called someone else "nice" that it was almost an insult.
My ex girlfriend, who broke up with me, told one of my mutual friends that I was "too nice".
When she broke up with me, at first I was upset and angry, but did not display this to her. I took the breakup like a man and did not curse her out or anything. She said there was no other guy (which I believe and was confirmed through mutual friends) and that she simply did not love me.
I went NC for a few months before I saw her again at an event with mutual friends. It was a brief and awkward encounter, but amicable enough. I saw her a few times after that and I always kept my composure and friendliness. She then went cold on me when she found out I started dating other women (this was months after SHE broke up with me, and I concluded there was no hope of getting her back. She had also flirted with another guy within my presence before I started dating again). I did not date anyone seriously, and I did not bring a woman around in front of my ex (mutual friends told her). Anyway, even after she went cold and rude on me, I continued to take the high road and kept things civil with her, smiling and nodding hello whenver I ran into her.
Given her "too nice" comment and the fact that she clearly wanted to get a rise out of me by going cold/rude, is there a point when a guy can actually be "too nice" to a girl? Should I ignore her, called her a bitch when she broke up with me or when she went cold on me?
Do women really want a nice, decent, considerate guy, or the bad boy type?
Do women want what they can't have? All these "nice" guys falling at their feet, paying them all sorts of complements are simply "too easy"?
Most Helpful Guy
Women require two things in a mate.
Physical and mental stimulation.
The physical can be found in the "bad" guy. The bad guy is usually tall, good looking, and confident. Things women can find attractive. Now, keep in mind, bad guys BECOME bad guys because they REALIZE they are good looking, tall, and confident, they've let their arrogance overtake them. The girl doesn't like his shitty attitude, she just likes EVERYTHING else.
The mental part, comes from sensitivity and support. Women DO LOVE sensitive and understanding guys. But this can't be FOUND in the bad guy, so she usually confides in a sweet and sensitive friend (often a male who is ALSO looking to get with her, but is too shy to ask her out).
Thus, the woman is forced to split her needs between two guys, and often where the whole "nice guys" finish last stigma comes in.
In order to be the PERFECT guy, a man superior to both the bad AND the good guy, you need to blend these two worlds together. Strong, confident, sensitive, but NOT willing to bullshit. Hers or anyone else's. You need to be a good guy who pushes back. That's how I figure it anyway.1