In college I dated a guy (Rick) for 5 months and he abruptly ended things prior to going off to Army training. Saying he did not want to put me through it. I moved on and dated other people but him and I always remained distant friends. I had been in a serious 4 year relationship up until this past September. During the serious 4 year relationship, Rick attempted to come back into my life by texting me once asking for another chance. I turned him down. Randomly in September, Rick text me asking to have me show him some condos in a different town about an hour from me. I said sure and didn’t think much of it because I hadn’t talked to him in probably over 8 months as a friend. Needless to say after we celebrated writing up an offer (my serious relationship was turning sour as well) I was dancing with Rick and leaned in and told him I still had feelings for him. He immediately took me outside the bar and sat me down. He began spilling his heart to me saying he always regretted breaking up with me and thought I was the one that got away. He said he could see himself marrying me. He goes I broke you up out of your first relationship back in college and now I am doing it again and this will be the last time. From September through end of October we kept talking and texting. In the meantime I had ended my serious relationship. On Halloween I went out with Rick and we ended up having sex. The best ever, many hours and just crazy fun. We kept talking after that but I started to pull myself away because I got scared. My feelings for him kept coming back so strongly. He picked up on this and told me I just needed to be single for a while. He went on to say that he would always be a friend to me and be there for me in any way possible but just not with dating or sex.
Fast forward to the end of December, in the meantime he kept saying to me that he could never see himself dating me and that I wasn’t the one for him. That hurt a lot but I accepted it and was focusing on me getting myself my own apartment, focusing on work and working out. Then he asked what I had planned for NYE, I said I was just going with the flow. He asked if I wanted to come out with him and a few guy friends and stay at his place as friends. I said sure why not. He also said that when I would get there that we needed to talk in person. I went into it with an open mind. I got to his place and we talked just like old friends do, catching up. Rick said well now what did you want to talk about. I said well I said everything in text messages and he goes well you know where I am coming from right? I said no what, he said “I just don’t want to be the rebound.” I told him that mature people don’t need a rebound and that I saw something more. We left it at that. He moved my bags into his bedroom and said that after the bars that is where I would be sleeping. At the bars other guys were trying to talk to me and he was getting very jealous.At one point he pulled me
What is really going on here? Why does he reel me in then push me away? I can’t keep going on like this but at the same time I feel something so strongly about him that I can’t just give up without a fight. What does he want from me?
Most Helpful Guy
I find it ironic that he is worried about being a rebound. Despite that you actually got out of a 4 year relationship recently, the way he's acting towards you is very similar to how a girl that rebounded on me acted. She would play these mind games like now I want you, now I don't. She didn't seem to know what she wanted either.0