Ladies, please explain. Why does she text me daily, but won't call me?

I met this girl recently online. We text almost daily and everything seems good. I asked her the other day if I could call her when I got out of school. She said she was working later. I replied, well how about you just give me a call anytime if you want to talk. She said she could do that, but not today, she was working a double, but maybe after. She didn't call. The next evening she text me and we talked for a while. The next day, I text her to see when she was working, she was at that moment. I text her saying give me a call when you get off and to have a good day at work. She replied 'you too'. I never got a call. That was earlier today. Haven't heard from her since. Is there some people who just feel too uncomfortable to call, or should I seriously be questioning this?

Should I ask if she doesn't like talking on the phone next time I talk with her? Any advice would be appreciated, cause I don't get it. I am starting to like her, but it seems pointless if I can't talk to her on the phone. Really, the only reason I want to talk to her on the phone is to ask her out, think talking is better than texting for this. Thank you


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I seriously can't believe how many people don't like talking on the phone. After all, it was the original intent of phones before texting and apps ever existed!

    I would definitely ask her if she just feels uncomfortable with this.

    I will bring to the light though…whether you get her on the phone or not, definitely meet her in person in the near future. You don't want to waste your time investing in someone who is cat fishing you.

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    • I'm almost at the point to just ask her if she feels uncomfortable with it and then just ask her out through text, saying I really wanted to ask you out actually talking to you, but it may just be easier for you this way. Regardless, I want to ask her out. So then I can either plan on that or move on

    • Sounds like a good plan :-) you got this!

      good luck! And I'd love to hear how it turns out!

    • I text her this afternoon, telling her "I didn't mean to pressure you to call me, you may not be comfortable with that yet... I just wanted to see what your schedule looks like next weekend, maybe we could grab some coffee." She said she worked til 1030pm and thought it was too late to call. I work weekends, since I have school during the week. Maybe after work tho"

      So she seems interested in doing so, yet we don't have a date set. I guess we'll see where the week takes us and I'm going...

What Girls Said 8

  • In today's society, it seems that "texing is the way to talk." I have found, even with some men, that they prefer to "push a few buttons", instead of using their voice to "say anything at all." True, it is frustrating, and like you, I have thought to myself: "I don't get it." I have found some were even lousy texters and-----next to nothing null and void callers. Now THAT, believe me, is enough to wanna pull your hair out---and theirs too.

    But if I want to continue in the running, continue, at least to see "how far this is going to go," I play along for awhile, depending on what is going on in their " busy life styles"(Some will either be honest with that or lie through their teeth if not very interested).

    There are many out there who really do prefer "text to talk". Rather than be bothered with even the idea of having to "idol chatter"seems like a big effort and a----turn off, if you will. I, myself, prefer just doing Facebook with my husband in Egypt, opposed to being on Skype and Yahoo at times. Depending on my schedule and how tired or---what mood I might be in----I don't always like to be "on the spotlight", you might say. On top of TALKING, it's "show time", and there are moments I don't feel like "looking my best."

    My advice to you, sweetie, although I know it is online, and you would LIKE to hear her"sweet nothings in your ear," just back down with the "phone fever" at the moment. I realize you want to talk to her, get to know her, and-----"ask her out," as you say. But THAT in itself can be done through a simple "sent", and she would probably relish this instead for the time being.Being you both met online too, may be playing a small factor as well. Perhaps, deep down, she is feeling more "comfy" to send and receive messages, too, right now. She may be feeling "cautious in her own right," slightly intimidated as well, so cut her some slack, and if you really want to "talk turkey" to her, send her a text and set up a date. If things do work out to your advantage, then you both can get to know one another better face to face, chit chatting the whole night through.

    I always thought, too, "talking was better than texting,"but I found out differently, that I have had to go with the flow in my life, in order to keep the waters from drying up.xx

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    • Thank you for your long response. You were 'whisper sweet nothings in your ear' away from best answer. That's not it, I just want to actually talk to her

    • lol..I know, my "sweet nothings" was just a pun--and my trademark..I use them all the time..Thanks! And I know you do..I was once dating a guy who, for a year, we would just text mostly and maybe call "here and there." But still saw one another, and "more hot" when we did..But I think she has her "reasons."xx

  • She could be nervous. I get nervous when I talk to a guy I like on the phone. I feel like I have to say the right things. Like I want to impress him. You never know. I think she should just call her and see if she picks up. If not, just ask her and see what she says.

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    • Think I'm going to do that. I mean she text me first all the time, pretty much daily. She refers to me as darling, which I don't quite know what that means, but it's actually making unsure if she is really interested in actually getting to know each other. I really would just love to meet up, grab a cup of coffee and see if we actually click. Short, simple, and with minimal investment.

    • Texting just comes natural for some people. It is just easy to do. A phone call can be a big step. Give it time she might not be ready. Throw it her way that you'd like to meet up through text. She's responding to you so that is a good sign. Darling can mean anything. Usually you'd say that for someone you're interested in.

  • Sounds like she is just stringing you along. Otherwise, no matter how busy, she would find time to call. I'd move on.

    But if she does text you back, you can ask again when you could call. If she makes an excuse again, then ask her then when is a good time to call her then. If she says nothing, sounds hesitant, or you get voicemail when you do call, then definitely move on.

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    • It has only been a week that we've been talking, but I don't want to waste too much time on a woman that is so hesitant about something so seemingly simple. Unless she really is just too nervous as of now. Guess I won't know unless I ask

  • Dudddddddde are you kidding me right now. The answer to this question is the most obvious of any question on this site. YOU JUST CALL HER!

    Girls don't want to be the first one to call a guy.

    If she doesn't pick up leave a voicemail. If she texts you back instead of calling because that could happening, then forget her because it sounds like she doesn't have enough confidence to talk on the phone. If she can't talk on the phone, what's gonna happen in person.

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  • many girls are not very confortable with calling a guy first.. specially when you're still in the process of knowing each other. does she ever txt you first, tho? if she only passively replies to your inputs, she might as well be not that interested. by the way the only way you'll know this is by asking her out. try to call first, if she doesn't pick up just ask it via txt. good luck

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    • She always text me first, at least 75% of the time. Said screw it and just asked her to meet up and grab some coffee this weekend via text. She said she works on the weekends, because she has school during the week, but maybe after work. So, nothing is set in stone, but I will revisit it by Wed. and go from there. Guessing it will be drinks instead, as she works til 9-10 normally

    • look if a girl is interested in knowing you, she won't make it this hard to get a proper date.. my guess is she's probably dating someone else already, and she's waiting to see how it goes with this other person to decide wether she wants to seriously consider other options.. plus, calling someone 'darling' when you hardly know the person, sounds to me like 'sweet-talking' (read: player)

  • no no listen, like you say this girl is, I don't like to call on the phon eother people, I don't know why but it gets me nervious, so I will rather preffer txting way more than having to call you,

    if she doesn't call you, don't preassure her, because she like you say is going to stop texting as much as before for fear that you might ask her again to call you, since she might don't want ot disappoint you

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  • How old is this girl? She is too busy to call for two min. while she walks ... Please...forget her...sound like games to me if I am looking for a relationship I would want to talk to the guy to get to know him.

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    • Well, she's 28. Mind you we have only been talking a week and haven't talked on the phone yet, so she could be nervous to talk to me since we just started talking. To ask her to make the first call is kinda putting her on the spot. Mentioned meeting up next weekend, she said she has to work, but maybe after we can

  • Maybe we hates speaking on the phone

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    • Wouldn't it be easier for her to say that, or does she maybe think that would sound stupid? I am starting to like her, but this is confusing me

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