Is he still interested? How do I communicate how I feel without scaring him away?

This man was interested in me (he's quiet shy, reserved, doesn't talk a lot, he is also a loner, doesn't have a big social life and likes to spend a lot of time on his own).. finally he asked me out and we had a lovely few weeks dating, then I feel I may have come on too strong, and I feel that he has lost interest. (He made it clear that he didn't want a relationship and that he was happy being single. He has been single for a long time (he is 38 I am 31)

Now he never calls or contacts me, however, I call him maybe every week, or every two weeks to catch up, and when we do catch up it's really lovely. I still feel we have a lovely connection (so our first date was 2 1/2 months ago) He doesn't seem like a player at all, but he doesn't like to communicate so I am trying to work out what is going on and whether it is pointless me keeping in contact. I want to take things easy and slowly, and to be honest, I just want the company, but I am worried that he thinks I want more (like a serious relationship which I don't).

How do I communicate this to him? I want to send him an email as he's not a talker. Is it wrong to send a man an email expressing what you want and how you feel?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Communication is aslwyas important. I would send him an email explaining what you are looking for. Sometimes it's best to do it through email that way the other person has time to read over what you are saying and will let it sink in. Face to face is even better but if you think he'd be more receptive with an email than do that.

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What Guys Said 1

  • If he isn't a big talker, Email always works. It may also help you get your feelings aligned with your words.

    I would ask yourself what you really want to communicate to him. Not just the words, but the feelings.

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What Girls Said 1

  • no it's not wrong but do it for yourself and with no expectations. send the email, tell him what you want to tell him and leave it at that. if he wants to contact you after that then good but if not, well you had a good few weeks and leave it at that and move on.

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