Boyfriend doesn't say much over text messages?

Am I just thinking too much over this?

My boyfriend and I were together 10 months, he broke up with me for two months because he was overly stressed in his school and home life and couldn't handle having a girlfriend since he had no time for me, and now we've been together for almost a month. We've only really seen each other twice, both times were wonderful. We spent quality time together and watched movies cuddling on the couch, things like that. He even said "I love you" a few times both times I was there.

But when we text, we don't talk very much and his are usually just short. Which before they used to be longer and more cutesy, but things have changed since he had started getting stressed with school and whatnot. Occasionally we will tease each other like we used to, but it isn't very often. He also says he doesn't want to say "I love you" anywhere but in person for right now. I know when we restarted, he said he wanted to take it slow. Is this maybe just part of taking our relationship slowly?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's hard to draw conclusions about the absence of something said. He may be somewhat uncomfortable texting, especially when stressed. He may be upset about something. Who can say?

    It's my opinion that texting is not an effective way to communicate. It's an easy way to stay in touch between times when you communicate bu it shouldn't substitute for talking on the phone or in person. Since getting together more often is difficult, is talking on the phone regularly an option? You would have a much easier time getting a sense of whether something is bothering him and what it might be. Hopefully you can help him vent on the stress in his life so he looks forward to talking to you rather than to see it as an obligation that leads to another kind of stress.

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    • He does have a lot of stress in his life. His family is pressuring and controlling, and he's in college, which he usually overloads himself with things for his parents to be happy. He doesn't want to be in college right now either, but they're forcing him. I know he's been stressed out with all that, which is why he previously broke up with me in the first place before, but gradually I guess he decided it was dumb and asked if we could try again. I know seeing each other helps him a lot though.

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    • That's true. Thanks!

    • Any time!

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