Why do I have trouble getting dates I don't know what I am doing wrong I need tips and advice please?

Like things to say that are legit and helpful and ways to attract women I feel like I really lack in that and how to get a girl's number and for her to actually text me back and set up an actual date.

and don't say confidence cause I have actually seen shy guys get girls


Most Helpful Girl

  • Why do I have trouble getting dates I don't know what I am doing wrong I need tips and advice please?
    Likely because the gals you want don't want you and that could be because of your physical attractiveness, personality, wealth, and/or status. Perhaps it's suited to honestly evaluate your looks, personality, financial standing, and social standing as in what you have to offer a gal and what you want from a gal. Then logically see if it matches up such as if you want an attractive gal are you attractive yourself or wealthy/social enough to compensate for your lacking looks. I state logically as I find a lot of guys are quite lacking in logic and seem to think being nice matches up with wanting an attractive gal which is off to me since being nice because you want something from someone is a trait it seems most people offer and likely something an attractive and really it seems any gal is used to ala having guys 'be nice' in hopes of getting sex.

    " I feel like I really lack in that and how to get a girl's number and for her to actually text me back and set up an actual date."
    Seems it's time to improve and expand on your public speaking, conversational topics, and flirting tactics.

    • Yeah that is why I asked if your not going to actually help and instead insult me then if you have noting nice to say then don't say anything at all.

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    • Or you can take what seems to be your route of objectification seeing them as a monolithic hivemind regarding gals as interchangeable objects to get and use manipulation. There's plenty you can do to lower a gal's self-esteem/self-worth so that she seeks your approval and validation. PUA seems to be quite full of such psychological manipulations ala negging, neuro linguistic programming, reward/punishment conditioning so she behaves as you want her to, etc.

    • Thanks for the help and I am only aware of some of facial expressions and body languages I am a funny person I have been told that lots of times and I have tried that PUA and it doesn't seem to work for me I guess you are right physical attraction is the most important thing. And I don't manipulate if I was i would be getting lots of chicks or any chicks at all I have never a gf before.

Most Helpful Guy

  • If you have a smart phone, I would suggest trying an app called Tinder. One of my friends was really, really shy, and he tried it. He went from having no dates to having a date nearly every night of the week. At least this way, you can practice talking to girls, and figure out what works, without having the fear of being rejected in person. Once you get the hang of it, use what you've learned on girls that you meet in person.


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What Girls Said 5

  • I think you should work on getting lots of self confidence. Being shy isn't going to help you attract women. Not all woman looks for a guy who is good looking or rich, most of the girls just want to be with a guy who knows how to handle things and knows how to be a real man with confidence.

  • Here read this book it tells you how to seduce people vk.com/doc-39319205_153955620

  • Self confidence! Always stay positive even if you're not with the person you want to date, because it shows on your body language if you're not and that's realy a turn off if a person is depro around you and doesn't even like himself. And the other thing is, just be yourself! That's the person they're dating and I think it's awesome if people show me their weird side don't be ashamed of yourself love yourself

  • I think it's your looks for starters? Work on your looks. I know ill eat shit for this one maybe :/

    • nah not really its your opinion some girls say I am hot i know cause I have asked online but i don't know I am one of those people who receives both sides of comments good and bad.

  • This is going to sound cliche' but be yourself.
    Just don't go about trying to date her in an creepy way, nothing turns me off more than someone who texts me 5x in an hour with no response back from me.
    To get an actual date, actually suggest a day and time and see what the girl says. That way it's more concrete then hey do you want to hang sometime this week.


What Guys Said 1

  • First of all: Confidence is KEY brother. I can't stress this enough. A lot of women won't be swept off her feet with a guy who is shy and can't take initiative. I speak from experience. I was (and actually still am sometimes) shy and very intimidated when approaching women I liked. Girls could sense this so they saw it as a weakness and 'unmanly'. But when I acted confident (NOT COCKY) and talked with women, made them laugh, (subtly) complimented them, etc., they noticed and wanted to hang out with me instead of trying to get the hell away from me. You gotta have that kind of body language and aura about you that makes women, or anyone in general, want to be around you and talk to you. Once you nail that down, you've already accomplished the biggest step in trying to find a girl you can date.

    Now, another mistake a lot of us make is that when we start talking with a girl, we instantly start considering her as girlfriend or "wifey" material. When this happens, it becomes a huge obstacle because it causes you to let your guard down and you start not being yourself. You either try too hard, come off too strong or become too much of a dormant. And bam, any potential with that girl is lost. Even if it isn't, it's a long way back to the top.

    Start small. Try to be confident with people in general, especially women. Don't be intimated. You can't put them on a pedestal just because they have boobs and a vagina. Once you get past that, you'll do a lot better when it comes to meeting women, finding the right girl for you, getting her number and potentially making her your girlfriend.