Too formal? Too mature? Is it so bad?

I'm 16 almost 17 from a small town. I grew up different. I practically raised my older sibling as well dealing with the fact I'm adopted.

A while ago I started talking to this guy and he had asked me out before but he usually told me he didn't mean to or he was drunk or high. It usually upset me and he understood and we eventually became friends.

He asked me out a week before Valentine's Day - this time he meant as more than friends. So I agreed. We had hung out several times before as just friends so I thought "why not?"

We went to see a movie then drove around. Not exactly romantic nor what I wanted to do but non the less I was having a good time.

He kissed me.

The next day less than 12 hours later he texted me. He told me it wasn't going to work.

I was mad because he told me during a very important speech meet and he knew it.

I asked why and his reply was I'm too formal, mature and I need to let loose.

I guess I don't understand. I'd hung out with him before. We were fairly close. He knew my past and where my future goals are headed.

The post of the question is:

Is it so bad to be formal, mature and a little tight if that's what you grew up knowing? If that's who you are? If that's what makes you happy?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Of course there's nothing wrong with it. It just wasn't what that guy was looking for.

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    • I guess that's true. But we've hung out before.. So it was like being slapped across the face. Ya know?

What Girls Said 1

  • Girl, first and foremost. kudos to you for being so freaking awesome!

    Secondly, to be honest... this guy basically showed you how much if a flake and jerk he was when he asked you out, and then took it back the FIRST TIME. For whatever reason, you decided to continue dealing with him and taking his word as truth. That's where you went wrong. I have a " ONE chance" policy with guys. If you act stupid and hurt me in any shape for or fashion, you don't get a SECOND Chance. Why? Because you should always believe who someone says they are, AND actions speak louder than words. If this guy REALLY was interested in you, he would be intrigued by your maturity and how responsible you have been in your life. He would want to know more about you and he would be fascinated by you.

    This guy is clearly extremely immature and douchy. You and I both know this. In reality, you shouldn't have given another chance because he didn't deserve it.

    As far as you are concerned, be proud of your accomplishments. Be proud that although things were rough, you're still standing and you survived an upbringing very different to what others are use to. Eventually, you WILL find someone who can acknowledge the light that is within you. But for right now, leave jerks like this guy in the DUST. trust me. Never allow some guy to disrespect you and then you go running back to him. It never works. Be encouraged. Good luck.

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