Girl I had been seeing for over a month is now acting different/distant?

I've been seeing this girl for over a month but we've known each other for 2 years. The timing has never been great between us but the chemistry has always been there. Anyways, things were going great, we had kissed on our last 5 dates and the last time I saw her a little over 2 weeks ago, I took awhile to kiss her and she said "finally... took you long enough". That night she told me that she was stressed/busy but she still wanted to see me and liked where things were going. I didn't really see this as a problem as things were going great between us and we were talking everyday.

A few days after I saw her (2 weeks ago), her behavior seemed to change. She didn't seem interested whenever I tried to talk to her and was very short/kind of cold. I asked her what the deal was and she told me again how busy/stressed she was and that I shouldn't worry if we don't talk everyday. I didn't talk to her for a few days and then she drunk texted me a week and a half ago. She told me she missed me twice, completely unprompted. When I tried to talk to her the next day, she was very short with me again.

Earlier last week, she texted me saying she was going to be in my town for work even though we had 0% chance of meeting up. We texted a few times and then she stopped responding. I then tried to text her the middle of last week and again she was short with me. Finally, I had enough of all of this so I told her to tell me if she wanted to see me or not because in the past few weeks she's acted really distant. I told her I wouldn't be upset. She told me she wanted to see me but it was hard because she knew she wasn't in a position to commit to anything because she had a ton of stuff going on and her life was crazy, and things were getting more real with me. She said how much fun she has with me.

I didn't text her again after saying this and then she texted me randomly the other night. I responded but she didn't respond, even though she definitely saw it. What's going on here?


Most Helpful Girl

  • She's playing you. Ask her upfront and call her on it. When a woman is seriously not interested she will simply not answer and be rude. In her case, she might be getting her rage from pervious relationships off on you. She doesn't meet up when you want her to, but then she sends random text messages... that's classic text book screwing with your head and emotions. So tell her that you are not going to tolerate that crap anymore and you give her one last chance to go on a date with you. If she is too busy, send her ass somewhere else and have some dignity, dont let a chick fuck with your emotions that way. Sure we shouldn't give out that quickly but what she's doing is plain cruel.

    • I feel like I'm getting so many mixed signals. On one hand, she still seems interested (why else would she tell me she missed me -- granted when drunk and continue to initiate conversations) but on the other hand, whenever I try to converse with her, she has become so short with me to the point where it appears as though she's disinterested. I feel like she's holding back because she's scared of feeling too much when she told me she can't put all her effort into things for a few more months (when her job finishes and she's done for the summer). I think when she was drunk she spoke the truth, she really does miss me, but when she's sober she's trying to suppress her feelings.

    • Show All
    • She already knows how I feel about her. My only option now is to go ghost and let her contact me if she wishes.

    • Take care and hope things work out for the better. Its tough.

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What Girls Said 4

  • All honestly I've not got a clue... bitchs be crazy maybe? But if someone wants to be with someone they make time for them no matter how stressed/busy they are (if anything that should make them talk to you more as you are a escape from all that) if they care they will always make time to talk, text and meet up end of. Sorry it's not what you want to hear but it's the truth

    • I agree with you. The only thing I can think of is that she got nervous that things were becoming too much like a relationship (talking everyday via text/phone calls) and decided she can't handle that right now. We talked every single day for 6 weeks and now I go several days without hearing from her. I've stopped initiating conversations because every time I try to, she just acts so cold to me.

  • Personal problems or she met someone else. Nonetheless, there's nothing you can do.

  • She's playing games. You are being used as a cushion for her to fall back on. Distance and "crazy" lifestyles won't stop a woman from a man she wants.

  • Sounds like she's playing hot and cold. If she really wanted to be with you she would stop playing games and make the effort. But you can tell she does care about you. I would say confront her and give her an ultimatum. And if she just gives another excuse. It's time to move on.


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