Online dating..why would you do any other kind?

Maybe it is because I am in the IT field I think this way. Now that I am single again after 25 years it seems to be the best time ever to be single. You have all these sites that offer matching.
Assuming that everyone doing it tells the absolute truth, it cuts through many dates and gives you an assurance that you have a set amount in common. If your doing that kind of thing why wouldn't you tell the truth? it would make no sense not to. At 45, and since I work at home, I would have no idea where to even go to meet someone. I have met 2 woman. One on Tinder and one on POF.com. Even though I realize that I am WAY not ready for dating it was nice to talk with someone I had so much in common with. I know that didn't come into play on Tinder but it was a way to meet.

What are your thoughts either way?
if you don't think it is the best way to meet someone why not?

  • Internet dating is the only way to go..
    22% (2)0% (0)13% (2)Vote
  • forgetaboutit..
    78% (7)100% (6)87% (13)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
The biggest thing I have heard from most women is so many men, many times half their age, just looking for sex. Or they are not really looking for a long term relationship. But it is easy to just delete someones message rather then meeting in person

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Online dating can be an excellent tool..
    You can meet hundreds of people within minutes!!
    I agree with your female friends.
    The way to make it work is to have a very clear and concise profile. Tell EXACTLY what you are and NOT looking for.
    Exchange a few emails and a recent pic. Talk on the phone or Skype first. Then and only then meet in person.
    The thing is your really have to pre screen.

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What Girls Said 6

  • I dont know if this is your first attempt at internet dating but Im assuming so. I tried it for a few years, went on a few nice dates with some somewhat normal men, but that about it. For ltr or exclusivity I think its a joke. Thats because unlike meeting someone out in public somewhere you have a whole slew of people on there that are playing the field.
    a lot of people on there are there for attention, lonely, in a bad relationship or marriage, seperated, or have a lot of baggage and drama.
    I do agree with you its hard to get out and find someone the regular way especially if you dont do bars, I dont do them either.
    So if you are just looking for some flirty fun with womeone that does share similar interests then you probably hit the jackpot.
    But for long term I dont believe so. JMO

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    • your in the same age range as I am. I hate bars and frankly would never want to mary a woman I met in a bar. I am not religious. so that leaves the gym or just walking up to someone blindly on the street. Would any woman even go for that? seems to me if I walked up to someone on the street and introduced myself she would think I am some weird stalker guy and run.

    • oh yeah I know, Im in the same boat, the only way I would probably ever meet someone would be through work, and fortunately I have. I know its hard Im just saying please be careful. There are some fruitcakes and some users on there. Enjoy it, be safe and Have fun

  • I think online dating is great for some people, but not me.

    I find internet dating very impersonal, you know, too planned. I don't think you get the same experience from online dating that you do from meeting someone the old fashioned way.

    I like eye contact and conversations where you can actually see the other person's lips moving... so much relies on that first greeting but with online dating you don't get that- you skip it entirely actually.

    I totally get that people have a hard time finding each other. And even when they do, they sometimes don't act on their feelings because they're too afraid- which is why I think online dating is great.

    But I'll also admit online dating isn't perfect, there are a ton of people who use it for all the wrong reasons, but there are a lot people who are just looking for love. People shouldn't dismiss it just because they've been set up with a few creeps.

    I think it's just a matter of preference.

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  • well you get loads of messages and a lot of them are just nonsense. It's hard to filter sometimes, it gets frustrating.
    I agree it can be helpful, but also look for other oppurtunities

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    • well, I have found talking with the women on the sites they get a lot of garbage. Seems that women have it worse. the last woman who was 48 said she just would get a lot of 20 somethings messaging her for sex, most from other races which she wasn't into. so yes, it seems for women there is a drawback. but it is very easy to delete those and move onto the real ones. Would it be better to get a bunch of messages online that can be quickly deleted? or hit on in real life by these same guys? I guess for you it might be like getting hit on by a bunch of us middle aged guys.
      At my age I don't have anything in common with a 20 something woman. If I was with her it would only be for sex. We would have zero in common so I can just not interested.

    • well I don't know maybe it's different on paid sites, but on the free ones, I found there was very little quality. Hard to find anyone decent really

  • It is basically an online candy store for men. I have never met a man online that was actually serious about a serious relationship. Also distance is a ~Major~ drawback with online dating. No one local even in my area on those things.

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    • Do you live way out in a rural area? you can set your search to a specific distance. there were a ton of hits in just a 25 mile range. And there are way more men then women on there so I am not sure how it is a "candy store". Seems that the women have their choice, not the men.

    • I live in a rural area and not much at all in a 25 mile distance and won't date farther away then that. So it's pointless.

  • I don't like internet dating it is the best way to meet a creep. I never want to do it again

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  • I met my bf on GAG over a year ago. It was just a normal online friendship and then turned into romance.
    Online dating can be good or bad. Depending on who is on the other side of the computer.

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    • Wow...for real? That's crazy! Good for you guys though. You just lived near each other, or are you doing the distance thing?

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    • That's awesome, good for you guys! :-)

    • XD thanks

What Guys Said 7

  • I'm a pretty old-school guy, so the whole online dating idea is crazy to me. It's probably totally wrong and unfair to think this, but my (completely uninformed) assumption is that anyone worth dating wouldn't need to lure you in over the internet first. Like I feel like unattractive people do it because its a way to get yourself in the door with your personality because you wouldn't get the time of day from someone in person based on your looks. Again I'm superficial, and shallow, and generally an asshole for thinking like that, I totally own that. But I'm a guy who likes to date hot chicks, and if their personality is cool, I'll keep them around long term, but while I'm still young-ish and beautiful-ish, looks are priority number one for me. I lucked out and found a girl who has both, but if i was still single my attitude would be "soulmates are for when I'm old and gross-looking, I'm going for arm candy here." I always here the spiel about "people who are tired of playing games", but I still want to play games, haha.

    All that said, I'm completely talking out of my ass here. Match.com could be a veritable gold mine of hot chicks that are DTF. I just had a friend who used to do match.com, and he was kind of a goof with no game at bars and parties, and he had one chick come over once and she's was an eyesore who had used that one-in-a-million good picture of her to deceive him. Long story short, she blew him and he never called her again. He also drove like 3 hours up to New Hampshire once to bang some sorority girl who was admittedly out of his league, so there's one for the Pros column. But SHE never called HIM again in that case, so it works both ways.

    In reality, there's probably plenty of good people on there, but I'm probably a douchebag and also am an old dog who hates learning new tricks, especially those dealing with technology.

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    • Can't believe someone up voted me. Reading it back, I want to down vote myself, I sound like a gaping asshole..,

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    • Also, I should apologize to the QA, that came off as super-douchebag-y. No disrespect intended, man. That's probably more me from 10 years ago talking than present day, I just never downloaded the upgrade, so to speak, haha. I guess my PC answer would be I'm skeptical of it, but don't really know too much about it. For what its worth, my aforementioned goofy buddy met his wife on match.com, and she's a great girl.

    • I think it's like 1 out of 5 relationships started online. So far I know 4 people that met their SO on cyberspace

  • I find it can be a useful tool but should not be the only way. Yes there are men looking for sex, and men sneaking online who are married, but so are women and I know this from experience.

    There are some issues though which is that the amount of men online far outnumber the women which means 30+ men are messaging one woman and this can give really inflated ego and a sense of self-entitlement. Not many men realize that the "shopping lists" at the ends of women's profiles are the red flags to avoid her.

    From my experiences while some women have ridiculous expectations among men, the rest seem to want a very specific type of relationship. I don't just mean like "a rich guy" or "a guy with a house" but everything down to the guy's hair style even (as stated in their profile whether or not you really believe me). I get that people have their dealbreakers. Even I have my dealbreakers. Last girl I met online for a date smoked weed and that was a dealbreaker for me. But after a while, these girls get way too specific with what they are looking for.

    The other thing is that I honestly feel a lot of people online would date whoever they were reading about if they had already met them in person. I feel like reading a profile is way different than talking to them in person. Plus some people are not photogenic at all and look much better in person.

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    • I know what your saying. I just broke off the relationship (my first I ever ended a relatinship)
      www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q989021-just-broke-up-with-someone-for-the-first-time-in-my-life-at-45-years
      .
      her entire profile was:
      DO not message me if...
      nothing at all about her.
      but that is what initially drew me to her. she knew what she wanted and didn't mind speaking her mind.
      but I just did't connect.
      then it turns out for all the "i don't believe in divorce...yada yada" she was divorced 3 times.
      but I have seen profiles on on POF that specifically said specific hair or got very specific into what he need to like or not like.

  • Eh I'd rather meet people in public and have these things progress and flow naturally.

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  • To be honest I sort of like the idea of a naturally forming bond. The more of me that can be seen the wiser the decision that can be made and thus the greater the investment.

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    • but so many people don't really have anyplace to find these bonds. I work from home. I can go a week without ever leaving my house. I hate bars and would never want to mary someone I met in a bar anyway. I don't go to church. That kinda just leaves the gym. where else would you meet someone? seems like a natural place.

    • I can't argue with that. I personally am one who enjoys joining local groups but I live in areas where there's usually local groups and it's large enough to have things like a small museum society and the like.

      I am not saying it's a bad thing at all. For some people it is the wisest way to go, and there's nary a thing bad about it; I just feel that until I end up in a situation where I choose to be more solitary it's not yet a viable option.

  • Online dating= Action+Timing-(Self-Esteem x Time)
    True Story, Bro

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  • It's good for people who don't have a lot of time on their hands. Personally I don't need it right now but in the future I may

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  • why not?

    any avenue to find a woman is good.

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