I met this guy about a year ago & half ago & we've been pretty good friends. This year around New Year's we began "flirting" I suppose, he came onto me then I eventually started to like him back. We were friends for so long so it just seemed meant to be since I've always been the type to jump into relationships.
Anyways, we went on a date & it went extremely well, as did every other time we saw each other afterwards. We spent the night together a few times, may seem a bit fast but we were just already so comfortable with each other from the year we were just friends.
After about a month, he told me he wasn't sure he was mature enough to be in a relationship but that he's in love with me & that I am the only thing that makes him happy. I was sad to hear this, what made it even worse was that it was over text. He admitted it was very lame of him to do it over text but that he just had to get it off his chest or else he felt like he was lying to me about something. This came as quite a shock, however, as the night before he had told me how much he loved me.
We agreed to see each other again, but it didn't go too well. He was crying, I was crying, it was just not a good time. He explained that he loves me & I make him happy but he just needed space & time to think. I wasn't sure why though, because if he loves me why would he want to be apart from me?
Knowing him for a year, he's definitely not the type to lie about something. I asked him if he wanted to stop seeing me & he said no, he loves me & he wouldn't be just saying that if he didn't truly feel that way. He assured me there's nobody else in the picture, he just needs time to think about us.
Yesterday morning, I texted him that I love him & I'm always thinking about him, but that if space is what he needs then that's what I'll give him. He said alright, & we haven't talked since. I'm just waiting for him to contact me first at this point...
Any advice? We're both 19/m/gay.
Most Helpful Girl
I was in something similar a while ago, although I was pretty young. I was 17 years old, he was 20. We were friends for long time and eventually started dating. He would always tell me how much he wanted to be with me and so on. Honestly I believed him and I think he was being truly honest with me. The problem was though that he was not ready for a relationship but not ready to give up on me either. It was hard, but I had to stop it. It was a waste of mine time. He would come back and then leave again. Always same speech. I pulled myself together and said that either we give this a try or not. Just as I thought he couldn't give me an answer. I also think that he assumed that I probably always would be there and therefore wanted to delay the relationship. Try giving him space and be a bit distant. Continue with your life. Tell him when he is completely ready he can come back.1
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