Am I overreacting to this? Please help me I don't want to make the wrong decision?

I'm asking this mainly because I'm a serious minded person and sometimes struggle to see the funny side of things.

Anyways there's this guy I know (Ross) who used to have a thing for me like a year ago. We've been talking again a little lately and he's always really nice to me. However he went out on Easter Sunday and ended up getting really drunk.

He left his phone lying and one of his drunk friends picked it up and sent me a message saying 'Invigorate my rotund hairy arsehole, f**king chipmunk' which I took pretty offensively and replied to in a shocked/annoyed manner. Ross messaged me the next day apologising and assured me his friend sent the message, not him.

However I heard today that he actually screenshot yes my reply and posted the rude message along with my shocked reply on Twitter. He entitled it 'I'm glad my social circle includes the sort of adult capable of the likes of this...' and it ended up a lot of people retweeted/favourited it.

I'm really not impressed that he's publicly posted this and I'm feeling quite embarrassed because I had such a bad reaction to it. I just don't know if I'm overreacting though?

I'm guessing he must not like me anymore if he's behaving like this.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You're not overreacting. I honestly think publicly posting it on a social media site was the first draw, if he didn't message you that then why would he screenshot it? Certainly he wouldn't screenshot what a friend messaged you and your reply (unless he's fucking stupid). And to post it on a social media site so people from all over the world could see it? I guess "keep it between us" is out of the question. The second draw was when he was bashing you not in a playful way but in a literal way. But only you know him personally and how he acts like so I wouldn't know. He was drunk and had the "I don't give a fuck attitude." and wanted to put you in your place by belittling you or something. He doesn't like you like that or he thinks being a jerk and thinking that this is somehow "funny" shows that he likes you. The way you reacted to it reassured his beliefs has a man thinking that he's superior and that you're inferior. I'm pretty open minded and I don't get butt hurt over a lot of things but there are times where people cross the line and I honestly think he's crossed that line.

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    • I'm not entirely sure what you're going on about here to be perfectly honest...

    • Maybe I'm wrong and misinterpreted but this is what I got from what you said. You said that it wasn't him that texted you, that it was his friend. But after all of that, why would he screenshot something that isn't his conversation? Or maybe why would he screenshot the conversation and show it to everybody? It didn't make any sense as to why he would post it. To show it to his social circle while putting you on blast? Nonetheless, he doesn't seem like a good guy for doing that. He really doesn't give a shit about you if he's acting like that. He said he used to like you but not anymore. He's changed. I think he was acting that way because he was drunk (being drunk they tell you the truth) and he wanted some sort of revenge on you for not liking him back during that time or whatever.

What Guys Said 4

  • Sounds like he is being sarcastic about the idiot that sent the message not you. Of course, my first response to something like that which would be out of character for the person would be a joke. Like 'hey, at least buy me dinner first!' and see what response you get. If it keeps going then you know something is up.

    Anyways, I'd tend to drop it. You acted reasonably for the situation. It is his idiot friend with the problem.

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  • Guys will be guys. Texting is VERY dangerous and can always come back to bite you. Be very slow to speak and even slower to text. No reply is sometimes the best until you're able to speak to the individual over the phone/physically. You know him best, some guys may think its funny. Explain it to him, very childish though.

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  • He sounds like a tool. You're not over reacting. Why do you hang around this guy?

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  • What did your response say?

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What Girls Said 2

  • Hmm Im a girl with a similar attitude to yours. I dont find it funny or humorous and although I dont think it was appropriate for him to post your message and the response, are you sure when he said "'I'm glad my social circle includes the sort of adult capable of the likes of this...' that he was also talking about you? I think he was speaking more on his friend and the immaturity of him to send that message to you. But nonetheless, I understand where you are coming from. I wouldn't have wanted the text message out there either, especially if I responded harshly. You have a right to be slightly upset, because he really posted the message with no other purpose other than to draw attention to it. But like I said, he may still like you, just the post was geared more towards his friend than you. I mean, you had a reason to be angry if you thought it was genuinely from him - "rotund hairy arsehole"... "f**king chipmunk".. he has to understand why you would be upset. It appears youve talked to him as you know that it was his friend and not him that sent it...just talk to him again and clarify that you guys are on good terms and that you accept his apology and you were responding to a misunderstanding.If you dont like that the tweet is up, tell him that and politely ask for him to delete because you were replying out of anger and you dont want the drama/attention to escalate via social media. I dont see a reason why he wouldn't still like you though. best of luck.

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    • WAIT. the guys are right though..you are only going off of his word that he didn't send it..it very possible it could have been him. most likely was him in a drunk fit...the only question is, if you haven't had any bad interactions with him before and you say he appears to be a nice guy, why would he even think those terrible drunk thoughts about you? yeah, I change my mind. and i rarely change my mind... I say forget him. too ingenuine and he was wrong to post it.

    • Glad you understand!

  • Disrespectful! ignore him cause that is rude and i dont like menn like that because they aren't menn.

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