Why do people change?

Why do your friends change when they get into a relationship?!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Most probably because they are staring to truly mature?

    Sure they can still be goofy and fun to be around with or you might feel like they suddenly feel withdrawn and cold...

    The thing about relationships changes people a lot emotionally- maybe physically- because the thing you need to know about relationship is that it indicates a progress to the next stage of life.

    There is a gap between adults who are single and those who are in blossoming relationships and those who have already found their true love and those whom have already married. And this forms a communication barrier between a lot of things.

    Like you just can't seem to fit in with anything they are talking about. I know cause I have been through when all of us gathered they would converse in their own world while you would be stuck in your own wondering what to say. It is like experience- a life experience.

    Eventually you would not have much common topics left...

    And communications is just one part of why you just can't seem to connect with your best friends who had already progressed on with thier life.

    • This is her first ever boyfriend, they slept together when they were only going out for 3 weeks. That's moving too quick. He's cheated on her loads of times. She knows this but she is ignoring it!

      I've been in very long relationship and they never really changed me in any way. I always made time for my friends during the weekdays and weekends. She doesn't. Its so annoying. I'm not close to her or anything but still that's not the point.

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    • She was never my best friend. Just a close friend. And fed up trying now

    • I have a friend like that too- pretty much. But his was a break up case. He just can't seem to get over it. Perhaps as friends we can only change them when they themselves want to change?

      Otherwise we are only wasting our energy and time. I know they are firne ds but still if they persist on being like that then wer can't do anything much.

What Guys Said 9

  • I never understood it. I can't stand people who are just so tunnel visioned on each other. I mean I know it may be "love" or something but I mean come on, just because your girlfriend is staying home cause she doesn't feel like going out doesn't me you have to as well.

    Its almost like these couples become one person. I would never want to be in that type of relationship. I am not one to hold a girlfriend from going out with her friends, in fact I would want encourage it. I want to be with someone but we both need our independence at the same time

    • I don't think its that alone. Ideally we naturally date and look for boyfriends/girlfriends because we want a mate and life long companion. So in essence they are only doing what they naturally want to do. And that's be with their girl/guy. And that is what love is. You want to be around the ones you love, but its goes deeper for those that are in a relationship. The love someone has for their friends is not the same love they have for their boyfriend/girlfriend. But some people do get all funky

    • like they don't want to be bothered with you any longer...or they stand you up for a scheduled day to hang out to be with their girlfriend/boyfriend. Now those kind of friends are jerk off. Cause we all know who they'll be crawling back to once the relationship ends. lol

  • Cause they loose part of their sense of self and get sucked into the world of the person they are attracted to. It's also a good sign that the relationship isn't built to last. Two people meeting and growing together is what leads to a successful relationship if you have to leave your whole world behind to come together with someone than you are f***ed.

    You could say its a matter of over investing, thinking that it's about giving your relationship everything rather than giving it everything your can. Who knows exactly all I know is any time I feel my self slipping into a girls world I take a step back because I know I am about to demasculate myself and start the process of killing the attraction I built with her.

  • Because they do not know who they are.

  • They change because they are more emotionally involved with someone. As such, they become more absorbed into another person's life, different than a friendship or a family bond and they will experience changes the deeper they get into the relationship.

  • normally because people take relationships too damn serious

  • I think a relationship is something close to your core of you're being, and emotionally you are prone to protect something like that therefore you behave in a different way, this is one point of view

  • bf/gf over friends but below family... That is the order






    randoms you meet though out life

    That is the order...

  • because their sucked away by their SO.

  • well,`cause they want to keep the relationship,and don't worry they will lose his friends.They think,friends will not break up ……LOL,to say the truth,just be happy for your friend,he or she dosn`t need to squander facial tissue or battery.


What Girls Said 12

  • Because some girls can't be independent and feel like they need a man in their life so they do the things they want them to and change how they are cause they think it will please them. Never understood it... But I kind of think its because your so crazy about someone that you do anything to make them happy in fear that they will leave for someone else.

  • I am going through this right now! Its pissing me off. With her last boyfriend we would talk all the time etc but she wasn't that happy with him. We wouldn't even really talk about their relationship. They broke up, she wasn't too sad. Then like 2 weeks later she's with this new guy and totally puts ZERO time into our friendship. I always start the conversations now and try to plan stuff. It makes me sad that she's so locked onto this guy. I've have bf's while being friends with her and I never did it to her. I always made time for her, because I had her before my boyfriend and knew she would always be there if he wasn't.

    She would always complain to me about how her friend shut her and he now ex boyfriend out when he got a new gf...yet she's doing the SAME thing now. I don't know what to do, guess just ride it out till she's over the honeymoon stage with him. I want her to be in love, but not shut everyone else out!

  • I do not know. But I hate it. I've never been like that in any of my relationships. I have friends who never got male attention in high school and now they're in relationships and are literally glued to their boyfriend pretty much. It pisses me of so much. Like really you're going to ditch me for a kid who's two years younger than you and still in high school who has a lisp? Really?

  • Because it's not the same as being single and being committed in a relationship. Things are bound to change. The initial excitement wears off and then sometimes there are a great amount of arguments. But not one relationship is the same. I think the perfect portrayal of this is in 500 days of summer.

  • I wish I knew the answer! My ex best friend changed dramatically and I eventually had to cut her off last Dec. If she drops him and finally gains some sense back in her brain maybe we'll talk again..doubt it though.

    • I have the same issue! except for the fact I have to see this girl because the person she got with is my sister and they both changed and I hate it.

    • Aww yeah that sucks..I know where to find this girl but I kind of avoid those places.

  • Oh gosh, I'm going through that now :/ my friend got a new boyfriend this semester, and we have not hangout outside of class because of this. I am the one that tries to make plans, but it never works out cause she is with her boyfriend, but she wasn't like this with her old boyfriend, so I am done trying to be her friend, and classes will be over in 3weeks, so being friends of 3 years has gone out the window.

  • because they get so involved with each other that their priorities and schedules change.

  • We don't change. we progress we regress or we stay the same

  • Idk why people tend to lose themselves in relationships like that

  • you have to... when you commit yourself to someone else, they become a part of your everyday life. it's just something you adjust to, and it changes you. some people for better, some people for worse. I know that dating my boyfriend has changed us both. he doesn't go out and party anymore, and I am finally thinking about settling down. not everyone is going to love it, but we're happy together, and that's what's important. and honestly... he's going to stick by my side a lot longer than any of my friends, so why would I care?

  • i hate it my friends been in a relationship with the same guy for about a year and it just feels like he's stealing her I don't know how it happens it hasn't happened to me but I guess its just how badly you get the "bug" I just talked to her and told her and we hang out a lot more now, but I don't try steal her from him because I know that he only has certain days off when he's able to see her..