Ladies can you tell me what she meant when she said that I'm "Cute for a black guy"?

A girl told me and I quote "You're cute...for a black guy." I didn't say anything to her in person but man...haha It kinda made me mad. Why can't I just be a cute guy? Maybe someone can clear this up for me.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • It was a racist compliment. This happens when someone wants to compliment another person who is from a different "race" and instead of simply saying "You're cute" they add for a (insert race) guy/girl.
    I understand why you're mad. I also would be if I were you.
    Some people think that black equals ugly and that's not true. She's probably one of these people.
    When somebody says something like that, they lose an opportunity to keep quiet.

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    • I really, REALLY appreciate your comment. Thenk you for taking the time to write it. This is how I feel. A lot of people have taken black and literally slung it through the mud. As if we're these big nosed, monkey looking, no good for nothing race. When she said I was cute, I heard that. When she said "for a black guy" I thought of what I explained.

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    • You're nice :)

    • Am i cute? :3

What Girls Said 20

  • Geez I'd be offended, too. Hell I'm not even a black guy and that makes me mad! Very ignorant of her.

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    • Haha I get what you're saying. I think it was an ignorant and unthought out statement for sure.

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    • lol well thanks! And yeah I hope so.

    • Duh! You're most welcome! Haha

  • That's gross. Even if people don't generally tend to be attracted to people of a particular race, they should never be rude and especially not flat out insulting. Also, just because *they* aren't attracted to black guys or Chinese guys or ______, that doesn't mean their opinion is the general view. Sigh.

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    • It's such a hard pill to swallow sometimes. Especially since she's younger like me. So it's not like she's this old fart set in her ways, she's learned this from somewhere and that...that worries me.

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    • Mkay I will!

    • You have to message me. Haha You're private.

  • Perhaps she said that to let you know that she's not usually attracted to black guys but you're attractive to her. Yea, saying '..for a black guy' is pretty mean and pointless. Maybe she didn't know that that was mean? I know a lot of people who are mean and they dont realize that

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    • That's why and I'm certainly not saying be overly sensitive. What I'm saying is that the world is bigger than our little corner. The more we learn about our surroundings, the more in-tune with one another we will be, the less likely situations such as this will occur.

    • Good thinking man. Especially in the u.s. Where different people groups converge it helps to be aware. Yeah...

    • Thenks sir bro. :)

  • What she meant to say is "I AM AN IDIOT, RUN AWAY FROM ME."

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  • It depends how she said it her tone. But it sounds like she generally doesn't go for black guys or isn't into them at all. But now that she came across you, she will change her views :).

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    • That's why I didn't want to react negatively. Who knows the kind of black guys she's run across in the past. If this chocolate one can help her change her perception of us, then by all means, I'm glad I could be the one.

  • It's an insult. You have every right to be mad. She's basically saying the majority of black guy's aren't good looking but you are an exception. If a guy told me that (in which one has, but the girl version) i would rip him apart (and I did).

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    • Hehe I bet you did. I, especially in America really can't afford to tell off a girl or anyone in a rude or loud manner because I already walk out the door every morning with one strike against me. Whether people admit that or not. The best I can do is show people that I have class and handle myself in those kind of situations with dignity. I'm definitely not saying that you were wrong by any means but as a black man in America...I hate this topic. :P

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    • Ha, you have no idea ;)

    • Haha Enlighten me a bit.

  • Have no idea... Maybe she just wanted to hurt you.

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  • -_- What a weirdo.
    She doesn't like "black guys" and she found it surprising to have found a cute one. Good. Hope life throws some more surprises down her path.

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    • Haha You're always so nice! Thenks love and I hope so too. She'd be surprised in all of the beauty she'd find if she opened her eyes and stepped out of her box.

  • awh man I'm sorry <3 yeah, that's gross bullshit. She was implying that black guys aren't attractive or whatever. Just antiblack bullshit. Ignore her & move on, she's not worth it

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    • It was just in passing but yeah, I think that was implied too. I'm not gunna lie, it bothered me and still does a little but at least she'll never know that.

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    • You're sweet love. (:

  • She is a racist b*tch.

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  • I don't know either. Tell me when you have an idea. XD

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  • Hahah oh my god, I hate people like that. Either like it or don't

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  • You know what she meant

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    • She could've just said "You're cute." I never say anyone's cute for a colour. That's ignorant.

    • yes it is, but you still knew what she meant. :P

    • Do I? If someone says "You make pretty good money for a black man." Do I know what they mean then too?

  • It sounds like she's not really attracted to black guys but she thinks that you're cute.

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    • Then why couldn't she just say "You're cute?" Am I not human and only a colour?

    • I know it's racists but I was just summing it down for you.

    • Gotcha. Sigh...haha This is kind of depressing. Seeing the true person sucks sometimes.

  • All I can think of is she's not attracted to black guys. Sounds like a preference of hers.

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    • I would've rathered her just call me ugly then.

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    • Ah I see your point better now.

    • I hope I didn't make you sad or anything. That was not my intention.

  • It's not racism but it's still not a very good thing to say. It just means she doesn't usually find black guys attractive but she thinks that you're one of the better looking among your race.

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    • Haha I'm not gunna lie. That explanation doesn't comfort me. Not saying that you're not right but it doesn't make me feel like a human being.

  • Lmaoo take it as a compliment.

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    • I almost want to. In the back of my mind, something stings.

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    • Aw thanks! Amen.

    • Most welcome. (: Amen indeed. Hehe I hope you never experience someone saying "You're pretty for a Pakistan girl." It doesn't feel very nice.

  • It means exactly what it sounds like. Its not racist its preference.

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    • Why couldn't I just be a cute guy then? Why did my colour have to play a part in it?

  • She is a racist cunt!

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  • My bf is Black, I didn't even said that to him when we met!:>

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    • I'm glad that you don't even think that way. You see people for people and that is awesome.

What Guys Said 14

  • I think you should interpret it as 'racist sluts think i'm hot'.

    So she's a worthless bitch and you're hot. Walk proud man, walk proud.

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    • Ha Thenks sir bro. Racism is interesting. Like, I'm upset but I almost expect it. 'Nd I HATE playing the race card but this one hit home.

  • Well, she may not find most black guys attractive, but thought you were cute.

    This is something I admit I think and talk will talk about with other people, just not that person or her friends.

    For the most part, I'm not attracted to most black girls. But I've met and know of some that are gorgeous.

    IMO, she was saying that she doesn't find black guys attractive, but finds you attractive. I'd take it as a pretty good compliment tbh. Think of it like this, what if her preference wasn't against black guys or she preferred, wouldn't that mean you're pretty damn good looking?

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    • looking at your pic you look fairly built and in good shape. Cut like a diamond.

    • Hahaha Thenks about that built part. I work with what I got. 'Nd I know, I hear you, I really do sir bro. You make valid points and your explanation is very well thought out but it just ticks me off that she couldn't have just stopped at "I think you're cute." Even if she doesn't like us chocolate guys. I'm still one of 'em. So even if her reasoning was as you say, those are still my brothers she's talking about. Like, not cool.

  • It could really go either way. And even is she didn't mean it in a racially-charged way, I'd say it's clearly not the best way to compliment someone.

    For example, I wouldn't walk up to someone and say: "you're cute for a tall girl", or "you're cute for a blonde girl".

    My guess is that she meant it as a compliment...maybe she isn't normally attracted to black dudes? Or maybe she doesn't have that much exposure to black guys, thus she's new to feeling attraction to one?

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    • I get it. I understand where you're coming from. The part that bothers me is that like, I see colour when I look at a person. I think that different colours are beautiful. The way in which it came off however was as if they was ALL she saw. That's why it hurt.

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    • Agreed. Maintaining composure will serve you very well in life! It definitely makes you the bigger and better person, so seriously, congrats to you for that! :-)

    • Thenks sir bro. I appreciate that. Thick skin, right? Ha

  • Don't make a big deal about it. She was probably raised in a white environment and not exposed to black people. Her grandparents are probably racist and hence she's used to seeing black people a certain way. Obviously she likes you if you changed her views from that. Also she is not racist, again it's the environment she was raised in (most likely I couldnt be 100% sure ofc). You know very well if a black girl that was raised in the hood, went to an all black school, hung out with all black guys and met a white dude she liked she'd use the exact same line.

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    • Well, I grew up in an all black neighborhood, went to a predominately black school and had mostly black friends and when I moved to California I wasn't like "Look at all these white girls." I just thought if she was pretty, she as pretty. Even though I also have people in my family who if they knew I was interested in white girls would have my hide. Yet, I'm an individual not a product of my environment.

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    • Idon't think she's racist, she may have just characterized blacks in a certain way. in an innocent way.sorry again for my keyboard.

    • Ignorance is bliss I guess. I don't think I am more intellectually advanced, just culturally.

  • Simply she normally hasn't been attracted to many black men prior to you. Maybe that means she hasn't seen many attractive ones or she hasn't gotten to know many black men which may be be required for her to have attraction.

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    • That's a positive twist on it. I mean she didn't say it in a mean way. It's just like when I step on a basketball court and dunk a ball and people say "Of course you can, you're black." And I say "No, it's because I practice."

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    • Yeah you know they are joking. The meaning behind the black people like chicken and watermelon thing (I'm black when it comes to watermelon :p so I'll mention it) is that they can't control it. I think the difference is that you know the chicken thing is a joke and your race being unattractive is serious to her plus insulting. I think that's when people call it racism.

    • Mhm. Exactly right. 'Nd I know (watermelon is fantastic right?) XD Don't get me wrong, there are a lot of pro black crazies out there that call every coloured related thing "racism" but generally, I think it's more stereotypical. Which, depending on the type of person you and they are can have a negative or positive impact on you.

  • I don't see the issue. I don't find certain groups of people very attractive. For example, I don't find English or Russian women terribly attractive either. Is it any worse to say "I think you're pretty good looking for a..." to a black girl than it is for me to say the same thing about a Russian girl?

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    • We're all people. Saying "You're cute for a black guy." Makes it seem like I'm not a person but a color. If you think someone's cute then they should just be cute. Whether you prefer the race or not.

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    • I see the observation, I respect the observation. It is a fact but how would you like for someone to come up to you and everything you do or don't do be attributed to your colour? Being white must be nice my dude 'cause it's not the same on this side.

    • Forget white losers Soren they're generally loud, dumb, and obnoxious.
      Also they actually make less than us Asians and spend more time in prisons. You can just take it as a fact no hard feelings.

  • That's racist. I wouldn't want her.

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  • It probably means that she's usually not attracted to black guys, but you're an exception.

    She didn't say " you're cute" in general because she felt the need to point out that you're special to be the exception.

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    • Eh...there's other ways to show I'm special than to single me our in my race.

  • She means that you're cute man. Just take it as a compliment haha.

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  • Some girl said to my bro: you're cute for a chinese guy and he took it well.

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    • Why couldn't he just be a cute guy?

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    • Yeah I don't know...

    • Haha You have a unique point of view. Everyone here is helping. (: I'm just interested in how different people would handle themselves in this situation. Haha

  • Typical white girl bruh

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    • Haha I don't wanna say that. As I've said I do like vanilla girls but at the same time, this particular one...she was something else.

    • Latinas where it's at bruh c'mon now...

    • Haha I'm about that cinnamon skin too. You already know.

  • She might not think a lot of black guys are attractive, and you happened to stick out to her.

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    • I'm seeing that to be a common theme here. Ha

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    • Just have to live with it brother, it's not fair but it's going to happen.

    • I've lived with it all my life. I've had worse and this girl is just one of the many.

  • She's not usually attracted to black guys.

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  • She's saying you're not marriage material. You know, because you're black.

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