Why won't he look at me below the neck??

We talk and flirt throughout the day at work. I've made it pretty clear that I like him by my flirty touches and grabbing his shoulder, etc. He doesn't flinch or move away, I think he likes it. He is always coming over to chat with me. He talks about all kinds of stuff, but I don't know if I'm just a friend. I had my jacket off at my desk, and thought he left for the day. He came over and sat down to chat. The sleeveless top and long necklace highlight my ample chest and even a girl colleague might glance below my eyes just in passing. (not gross or anything) but he stayed FIXED on my eyes as we talked. I was getting cold and reached around to get my jacket and put it on. I saw from the corner of my eye that he kept his glance above my neck. Though I appreciate it as a work colleague, I can't help but think (dude. You're not even Interested in checking out the rack? Come on. You're a dude! ) Look, I'd know if he's gay, he's not. He is a hetero. A very hot, sexy, bit rough, blue collar type that is very attractive to me. Also, while I'm asking. Should I do something to see if he likes me?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Actually, homosexual men will look as well. The fashion-sensitive ones love picking women apart. Just watch any reality TV show dedicated to fashion or "what not to wear. "

    I tried this technique before, where I trained myself to look women in the eyes and not oggle them at all. Not for any malicious reasons or to play games, but I just got tired of the dirty looks when I might occassionally be interested in sneaking a peek. The amusing thing is, women will get just as upset if all you do is look them in the face the whole time while talking to them. Lose/lose situation. I share my story to point out he may have a reason for doing this. Classy as others have suggested, maybe he is deeply religious, or maybe he has secretly oggled you so many times he doesn't need to keep looking? :) If you have a beautiful face, that can actually trump whatever is below the neckline. I've talked to women like that before, I was totally not interested in looking anywhere else.

    Good luck, I hope you get to find out where you stand with him. If you end up together he already has shown his respectful side. That's always a good thing.

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What Guys Said 5

  • You have yourself a real gentleman who greatly respects you! By keeping his eyes fixed on his eyes mean he is deliberately trying not to look at your twin girls. He is really conscious of your opinion of him and he wants you to see him as a complete gentleman.

    He will not look below your neck because he sees it as disrespect to you, and he wants to be completely respectful to you. Some women don't mind a glance below the neck, some actually want it (like you), and some women are conservative and don't like it. This doesn't mean he thinks you are conservative, but he's playing it safe.

    He might actually like you, or he might be strictly professional with his coworkers. If he is strictly professional and is unwilling to date his coworkers, then you have to try really hard to get him to break his own boundary. Touching him should give him a hint that you like him. If he smiles at you often or touches you, that's probably a giveaway that he likes you too. Try to get more out of him to see if he likes you than simply trying to get him to look down. You might actually be torturing him to no end when you wear sleeveless tops.

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  • That's a really sticky situation especially in a work environment. Now a days, us guys really have to mind our manners when it comes to checking out women, as much as we want to. We all know in the back of our minds that if we look or say something out of line and the wrong person hears it, it's death! Some of us are respectful ;)

    Is he in a relationship? I assume he's not married at least. If you feel like being gutsy, throw out there that you might be going out for drinks later and if he'd like to come, he's welcome to it.

    Just my 2c. Good luck

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    • Thanks. No he's not in a relationship right now, and we're "supposed to" go for happy hour one of these days but the timing is always off. He DID say he would go....and I also suggested we "get some people" to go see the band that one of our fellow colleagues is in...I said 'wanna go"? He said, "well, maybe, that might be fun", but it wasn't like a date, I asked him like a buddy. totally non threatening. Not sure. Don't wanna go too fast, but I really like him.

  • You say he was fixed on your eyes. That indicates a conscious effort not to pet the puppies.

    My guess. He likes you and doesn't want to come across as being interested in your assets. I have had to do this in the past. Force my eyes to hers because I didn't want to leave the impression that I was only interested in her magnificent boobs. It is and has been my belief that most girls don't approve of being "checked out" and see it as degrading. If you want to give him the ok to notice the twins then make some kind of casual remark about them when you're together. His response should include some glance below eye level. Then, once he sees that you're ok with it, he should feel ok with it.

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    • Thanks for the wisdom and insight. After some recent chat activity and seeing him chat with others....and being greeted with "hi kid....hows it going?", I think he might just be into "friendship"...though I catch him stealing glances at me all day. Frustrating at the least. Can't tell either way.

  • Maybe he is just trying to show that he sees more in you than just a rack. Seems like a classy individual.

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  • I think he likes you. Here's why: He doesn't want you to think that he is a pervert for checking you out, he likes staring deeply into your eyes (which means that he is more interested in you on an emotional level than a physical one (which is good)), AND just because you don't notice him looking at your chest doesn't mean that he isn't. We guys have checking out chicks bodys to a fine art so that the girl doesn't notice. But if you make it obvious that your trying to show off you rack to impress him then he should get turned on like crazy.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Maybe he only does so when you're not looking?

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