What does a guy look for in a girl?

Now I know, this question is probably asked many many times. But what does a guy look for in a girl?

If you are from the ages of like 16-19 are your preferences of a girlfriend different?

How about if you are from the ages of 20-25?

Or how about from 25+? --

are guys at different ages differ in preferences ?

or do all guys have a universal traits that they look for in a girl?

and how does the different age group see "beauty" in a girl?

Updates:
Thank you everyone :)

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Most Helpful Guy

  • do different ages entail different preferences? (yes)

    15-19:

    - "beauty" is most highly valued at this age

    - looking for someone "hot" to show off to their friends the caliber of girl that finds them sexually desirable

    - looking for multiple girls just to have sex to validate their concept of how sexually desirable they are to the opposite sex

    (period; that's it)

    20-29:

    - lack of "beauty" can disqualify; but its mere presense is no longer enough to qualify a girl

    - start becoming aware and more interested in character and personality

    - a dishonest, exploitative, or manipulative nature will disqualify a girl

    - looking for emotional affection, caring, comfort, love and warmth

    - looking for someone to have fun with (activities, travel, intimate moments, etc)

    - looking for someone to have a great sex life with

    - looking for someone who isn't dependent on him (financially)

    - looking for someone who is doing something with her life (career/education)

    30+

    - lack of "beauty" may no longer disqualify a girl

    - a demanding and unappreciative attitude, or sense of entitlement can disqualify a girl

    - emotional affection, caring, comfort, love and warmth can be enough to qualify a girl

    - someone fun is an added bonus, but no longer as important

    - sex is still important, but lack of a great sex life (frequent/passionate) may no longer disqualify a girl

    - looking for someone who is already somewhere in her life (career/education)

    - looking for someone who can contribute to the family (ie. earns more than she spends, can control her desire to spend on things she wants for the good of the family)

    - looking for someone who will make a good mother; (because he wants to start a family)

    universal traits?

    - physical appearance

    - sexual desire (someone practically asexual is the same as someone cheap; what's the point of being hot or rich if you're asexual or cheap?)

    - caring, sweetness, warmth, and REAL emotional intimacy

    - someone on the same level (similar interests, ways of thinking, great chemistry)

    - a deep interpersonal connection, where you both feel close to one another

    - productive; someone who will ADD to your life.. not TAKE AWAY from it..

    - motivating; someone who makes you WANT to make them happy, and take care of them; and realize your full potential.. someone who makes you feel like you can move mountains when they're next to you

    - communication; someone who communicates, not manipulates.. someone who compromises, not demands until they get their way.. someone who understands you.. respects you.. and who is happy when you're happy.. and upset when you're upset.. so that nobody feels used or taked advantage of.. or ignored.. so that every step in life feels like you're making it as a team.. together..

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    • I love that you included "REAL emotional intimacy". A lot of people do not understand the concept of emotional intimacy and how important that is to having a relationship as time goes on.

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    • I guess I'm the only one who disagrees with you.

      Heaps of points in the 30+ range apply to me, same with the 20-29 range and none in the 15-19.

      Either you're overgeneralising (is that even a word?) or "I'm mature beyond my years" : D

    • I'm sure you are a more mature and it's a perspective things at times. It also goes with how we are raised

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Would you date someone younger/older/married?

What Guys Said 14

  • The only thing I can say that is true of most guys is that as they get older, they become less concerned with how a girl looks and more concerned with everything else about her.

    In my case I've always had a thing for athletic girls, but it wasn't really a priority. One thing that HAS always been a priority, however, is intelligence. Brains are the single most important thing a girl could have and one of the things I am not willing to waver on.

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  • I wouldn't say that men are really all the same. Most of the time for young guys it's all about making others jealous or all beauty. However there are some men that care very little of the beauty of the girl and more for the connection and real emotion they feel for the girl. I for one had a crush on a girl in my class because she read the same books I did, listened to the same music, and I felt comfortable being around her. She was flat chested (flat chested as in bra not even necessary), short, and was a little pale. None of it mattered to me, because she was someone I truly connected emotionally with. Best homecoming ever was with her. Sucks she moved 2 continents away... Oh well nothing good lasts forever it seems. The problem is romantic type guys can't stand being rejected by their first attempt at asking a girl on a date so they sort of just don't even try lol. (The only reason I even asked her was she didn't have a date the day before homecoming so I figured it was my best chance)

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    • I agree the best things never last forever....

  • Well I'm 22. I look for a girl who is...

    1. Hot (People say it's shallow but there's nothing wrong with finding someone physically attractive)

    2. Smart

    3. Has ambition

    4. Has a cool interest/hobby

    Although I'd like to find the love of my life, I'm really not in a good situation (interning abroad) and I couldn't settle down if I wanted to. So for me, beauty is much, MUCH more important. Hell, if I can pluck up the courage to talk to a hot girl, then it doesn't really matter about anything else.

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  • The older we get, the less picky we get and the more we use words like "doable".

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    • What's your logic behind that?

  • im 23, ill be 24 next month and I'm looking for a girl to marry and start a family with. My girl is 19 turning 20 but she is actually looking for the same thing too. When I was 16-19, I just wanted a girlfriend to hang out with and get busy with. And when I'm 25+ If I'm not married yet, I'll still be looking for a girl to marry and settle down with

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What Girls Said 3

  • Since I have been on here for a while I have definitely seen different versions of this type of question, though yours is interesting as it adds the dimension of a change in perspective at different ages.

    I know as a woman I had different ways of selecting a guy based on my age. When you are a teenager it is all about "He's so cute". In your early 20's you still tend to consider looks but you also consider somewhat how productive/successful he is. In your later 20's or when you are ready to marry you look at whether he has a good job and would make a good husband/father. Now, after a long marriage and divorce, I look at whether he will make a good lover and partner who sincerely cares about me.

    I will let the guys give their version of a progression in perspective and hopefully you are lucky and get an older man's perspective on how he changed over the years.

    I can say this, I completely understand our desire as women to feel attractive to the opposite sex. When we are really young we can believe that physical attractiveness and sexual compatibility are the key to getting a guy. This belief can even persist for many decades into our adulthood. But the reality is it is much more complex than that. For every type of figure and look you can find in a woman, there is a guy or a group of guys that will find her attractive. Take a look around. Do you only see super model status women with boyfriends? No. In fact, sometimes the very attractive are the ones without a current boyfriend. Again, that is because selecting a partner or a mate is so much more complex than looks. And, you should know by now that having sex with a guy, no matter how great it was for him, is no guarantee he will become your boyfriend. So all these posts where girls are wondering if guys prefer a girl who is this height, but not that height, or this weight or shape or hair color are all a waste of time because they miss the mark.

    Yes, having that special something that turns a guy's head and gets him to start talking to you is of value, but luckily that special something can be a whole lot of things. There is NO universal look that all men will go for. And, once you have their attention from a physical perspective, well there is a lot more that goes in to him seeing beyond his initial physical attraction to you and some of that has to do with him, where his head is at, and there is nothing you can do about that.

    In the end, what a guy is initially attracted to is different for every guy and it is not what he will fall in love with. It is simply a starting point.

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    • This was such an amazing answer! You should write a book on relationships because you're awesome =)

    • Thank you!

  • 16-19: this age most boy (but not all of them, thx God) prefer "beauty". that one girl who looks beautiful and dress cool and sexy clothes, and turn heads... that's the kind of girl they want... the one that looks hot and cool. and when they get to know them, most of them just want sex, and don't care if the girl is a b!tch or a dumb bimbo.

    20-25: in this time of life, most guys sure feel attracted on the first time for girls with good looks and a cool and feminine sense of fashion. and when they get to know the girl, they sure value a lot a girl who can carry a conversation in a friendly, smart and mature way, so they can have that girl as a good choice for a serious relationship. they sure won't give much value in a dumb girl who can only offer looks and sex.

    more than 25 is the same as 20-25.

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  • this is a really good question and the answers were all great. thank you for asking this.

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