Dressing up nicer doesn't really work in high school does it?

I mean I'm not the most attractive guy in the world, but I get frequent complements, especially from older women, anywhere from their mid 20s, middle aged married women, to much older women that I'm very attractive... I'm 19.

A woman in her mid 20s said I was "a cutie" and many older women give me a lot of attention, not romantic obviously, but they'll compliment my looks, or say I'm a great kid or something... and a few have said that in a few years, women will give me a lot of attention.

But in high school, I wasn't in with the partying crowd... I hung with kids like that in school, I was semi-popular I guess... had a lot of friends, but I was a quieter guy, more shy, and I didn't party.

I never really dressed like a jock, emo, or prep. I mostly dressed a little nicer. A nice collared shirt, or a button-up shirt. usually with jeans. I mean a little nicer... nothing too over the top, but I hoped that girls would take notice, but I never really made that many close female friends. I'm not afraid to talking to girls BTW...

Of course I liked prettier girls in the school, but I guess popularity mattered more. So dressing nicer, doesn't seem to attract girls my age?

Is it really about who has the most "fun?" I mean, I know how to have fun, but I just choose not to associate myself with some of the things partying tends to bring about... And it seems like girls are attracted to guys that dress a certain way too... the jock, the emo, etc.

Any advice for me? Thank you!

It's all about sex appeal isn't it? Well first off, I'm not really muscular, so I couldn't wear a tight shirt to show off my "nice" body. I'm really just a regular guy. I mean, I don't try to fit in, I don't want to look poser-ish...
I just dress up a tad and try my best to look good and smell nice... But really, there's absolutely no luck with the ladies so far. I mainly get attention from girls that are a couple years younger, or that just aren't appealing to me.


What Girls Said 1

  • you may be confusing dressing nice with dressing trendy. I'm not really into guys that wear collared and button up shirts, its a little stuffy. it depends on the clique of girl you're trying to attract but wear clothes that are trendier, current and in style. for example I am attracted to guys that wear Polo and Coogi..an emo girl would probably want a guy in skinny jeans and graphic tees..a preppy girl would probably want a guy in Polo and A&F. yeah it sounds shallow but if you want pretty and popular girls that's what you have to do. if you are into the hot popular type girls then yes its about having fun and the party lifestyle and having a certain image. its how it is. just like if I wanted to attract a hot guy I couldn't be all like "i like to read non fiction books and I'm very intelligent" I would have to look the part and appeal to his physical senses.

    • So basically, I gotta dress in a pink A&F shirt? or in tight pants, or whatever?! Dating at a younger age seems so fake... like you gotta be someone you're not... You have to dress a certain way or give off a certain impression...

      I don't look for casual or sexual relationships either. I just want a beautiful girl, that appeals to me and that can appreciate me for who I am, not who she wants me to be. Is it too much to ask for at this age?

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    • Um how are you gonna tell me as a woman what we like? every girl is different but I and a lot of girls care about style. if you want someone who looks good don't you think we do too? I'm trying to help you out

      if you are looking for a serious relationship there are girls who want that but you have to get to know her and feel out her personality because there are girls who are looking for what you want, they just don't know who to trust among the players out there

    • I can say this because I've picked up a variety of women, with me wearing the same clothes.

What Guys Said 1

  • It's not about the clothes, it's how you wear them. If you look comfortable with yourself, girls will find it attractive, no matter what you are wearing.

    • So... (also in response to your comment on the other answer...)

      I just gotta be a fun, nice guy, and be confident? I don't smoke or drink since I'm underage, but a lot of girls seem to like the guys on drugs or that love to get drunk on the weekends... I look for pretty girls, that have a lot going for them... If they party a little, it doesn't bother me, but I don't frequently go to parties. I just mainly pursue girls I like in school. But with the way I am, I seem screwed...

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    • I think because people that aren't virgins, just look for ways to get some action... It's obvious that sex isn't anything too special to them and is just a norm in relationships, so they take what's offered to them. One of my friends, would have sex purely for self-pleasure with any girl that was at least average looking, because he just wants sex. He doesn't care... I don't respect him for his ways, on this topic, but its just how he is.

      I respect women and am looking for something special.

    • Yeah, but if you're not just after sex, why possess impossibly high standards in relation to how a girl looks?