I have been dating this guy for about a month. I've known him for years. We have not had the relationship discussion yet. I completely quit all ties with other men and have become monogamous with him. I'm really scared to commit, but I REALLY really like him- in so far that I am willing to finally commit. Is it too soon to discuss the relationship status? How do I know that he feels the same way? How can I do it without ruining things?
I find myself searching for something wrong with us, but he's an angel!
Ask him tap ins, hey what do you like about me, what do you not like about me. Ones like that. But don't make it to obvious if you don't want to blow you cover ya know. Ask him hmmm what you like in a girl, and what you not like in a girl. Then that will give you confidence to make the move. See what's in his head with out him realizing it. Ask him how come you ain't got a girl, do you have someone in mind that ud like to be with. And if he kinda looks at you funny and makes you feel its you. You got him, now get him. Lol. Good?
One month? Yes, it's too soon! Let him learn to appreciate how fun and wonderful you are (note: remember to be as fun and wonderful as possible whenever you are around him. ) Let the relationship develop and deepen. After a couple more months, see where things stand, and maybe (maybe) consider having "the relationship discussion" at that point. By the time you have "the relationship discussion", YOU (at least) should already be confident that you do have a real relationship -- otherwise you do run a risk of scaring the poor guy. Good luck!
Why are scared to commit? Are you afraid of loosing your independence? Are you scared to loose that spark once you "commit"? Do you have to ask him what he thinks, can't you just feel it? Do you need to isolate and discuss it and box this idea in? If he shown in every which way that he wants to be with you then do you even need to say or bring up the word commitment? Doesn't his actions already speak that he is committed to you?! Relax and take a chill pill and stop over analyzing you could ruin a potentially beautiful and long lasting relationship. Go with the flow and have fun. No need to get intense -- he is an angel and your lucky. Now, give him a hug & tell him how much you love him. K?