Do I get to look like that?

Seriously? Why are guys not realistic like I am sick of looking at the chicks that pose in those bloody pornographic magazines. I compare my self to that I know it sounds stupid but stuff like that makes me feel insecure and not good enough. Honestly I am like hard out confident and people always say that I'm hot and I am not fat but still I just want to know?

Do all guys expect the average day woman to look like that? I mean C'mon? That so isn't realistic for some?


Most Helpful Guy

  • no not all guys think like that. some of us live in the real world and understand that we are all individuals and look unique. those girls in the magazines are fake and air brushed and someone in real life is soo much better to look at and if it comes to it, get off to looking at. From your pictures, you do look great so I would not worry about that at all. Look at it the flip side, if women thought all men were models, a guy would never get laid... =)


What Guys Said 7

  • When guys look at porn, they like to see "hot" girls.

    When guys look for a wife, they like to see "beautiful" girls.

    Porn fulfills a lust, a desire for men. They are able to get their quick testosterone fix, and move on in their lives. That is what porn is, not an ideology for women to live up to, but a way to tide men over till they get into bed with the girl of their dreams.

    Don't worry about appearing as "hot" as some of the Barbies (R) in the Porno industry, they fulfill the needs of countless men for 7-8 minutes and then are done.

    No respectable guy is looking for that in a girlfriend. None.

    All you need to worry about being is yourself. Many a man can see the difference between "hotness" and "beauty. " It isn't as though he is lowering his standards, he just wants someone he can wake up to in the morning, and tell that they are beautiful.

    Beauty is more than the physical, it is the spirit and soul of a person as well.

    In short, don't let the fake boobs get you down. If your man wants that, he isn't for you anyway.

    • Your answer was going to make me cry :') but in a good way. I just can't pin point what men think when it comes to stuff like that? And I always tell the people around me be careful what you wish for cause they know I'll take it to the next level just out of spite. Like I just don't want anyone to hate on me well be critical of me e.g family friends when it comes to my looks so the porn star look is way hotter then every other level but I just got to get my head around this subject

  • Nobody wants to be ugly. Period. When you look at all of society, everything and I mean everything focuses on men being tall, hot, fit and rich while must be hot and healthy. Porn has no bearing whatsoever, we can go online and see ads of mortgaging with pics of young hot women or tall athletic men. This site alone sees way too many questions of "Will You Date Average Looking Man? " or "Why Not Date Short Men? " or one asked, "Are Fat Women Still Sexy? " You can bet you bottom dollar what most of the relies were.

    In all of my years, just being attractive without being super hot is the best you can be. If people are telling you straight up that you are hot, you should have no lack of self-esteem and be happy that nobody has said anything bad to you. Just by looking at your pic, I would rate you an 8. To be rated physically a 7 to 8 is the best. Why? Because it makes one realize that they are hot but there are hotter so it usually forces on to be "Down To Earth" and makes for the best personalities. People who are 9+ tend to be selfish because life centers so much around them, accustomed to everyone doing everything for them and able to select any lover they want; that their personalities and romantic performance slacks off.

    The average woman is just that: average. She is ok in looks, "doable" but not the hottest. This is acceptable to an older man as myself because I look more at a what makes a woman on the inside and not mesmerized by boobs and butt. Be grateful you look so good, millions of ugly women would KILL to have your blessings. Besides, do you REALLY want to be a porn chick?

    • True true you got a point about millions of other women. Though I always go for what's inside and humor man humor gets me EVERY time. I'm always an eight lol well at least its an even number. Right now I'm asking myself that question and I am so dumb founded right now. I'm just sick of women being portrayed as that gives normal chicks like me more insecurities and competition

  • Well aside from the all around picture like windchaser described, I'm going to go physical. You don't want to look like that. If you look like that it's more of a masturbation/fuck thing than a guy taking you seriously. It's best if a girl is really hot but really normal too, that way it's more exciting to think about her as she's not just a piece of ass (although the ass part is good too). Now when I say "hot" do I mean look like a porn start under your clothes? No, of course not. Porn stars are just sexual fantasies, if they showed up, no guy would want to be with them, they just want to f*** them every night. If you try to look like this you're going down a path of "I want guys to fantasize about me and f*** me. " That's not what you want. The best type of girl has goodies but hidden under her clothing that way we think, "damn, I wish I could see what she's packing" and the mystery makes the thought of it that much better than just naked repulsive porn stars. You should try to have a nice firm body and great skin. Not "F" sized boobs that might break your back. What will these chicks do when they get 70? They may look hot at 32, but they're just going to look dumb later. Guys want girls that are confident, smart, and put effort great effort into looking for Suave Man, duh. Lol you don't have to go under the knife unless you're like "AA" cup or you're obese. Boobs don't have to be huge just as long as your stomach looks nice and smooth as to make your boobs protrude more that's great. You say you're pretty confident but you're still a little self-conscious. That's okay, I can be self-conscious too, I look in the mirror everyday and think, "am I good looking? " Especially being black in a crowd of white dudes, "do I look as good as these other guys with the blue eyes and straight hair? " But then I come back to reality and say, "of course I am, I'm Suave Man. " So, it happens to all of us, not just chicks. The key is "confidence. " I have a friend who isn't that great looking but he's so sure that he is that all the girls like him. They believe he's good looking even though he isn't. Because what you believe about you, others will believe about you too (a quote by suave man) ;)

    • Lol I got to remember that psychology is the key. Confidence and make people around you believe what you think about yourself. Thats good advice

  • Your question gave me a good opportunity to contrast men's desire in the perfect body with women's desire for success. I also thought about this issue a while back, and it was a bit confusing to sort things out.

    Anyhow, for your question. I do have to say yes to some degree. It does seem like many men have greater expectation on physical appearance than women. Men were hardwire to find the most healthy/fertile females to mate with. And for women, they generally look for men with more resources and success to help raise their young. We were evolved to be this way.

    But the real question is, how much should we let our natural instinct affect our decision in mate selection? Should we be a creature of our flesh and let our primal drive tell us what to do, or should we dig deeper for more meaningful ways? We need to look back and do some self reflection.

    If you are a woman, ask yourself how much do you care about a man's success, not just financially, but also psychological(confidence, intelligence) and socially(large network, friends) as well? If you honestly came up with the answer, "I care about those things more than anything else," then keep in mind that you do have standards. Well if you have xyz amount of standard for men, then shouldn't men have certain standards on you too? They will of course want a very very beautiful, sexy, hot looking woman if they are going to live up to her standards.

    Now suppose that a man doesn't emphasize heavily on looks but rather personality. What do you think he expect his woman to want in a man? His type of woman of course will treasure a good personality over success. These couple are matched in terms of their social exchange. They are exchanging things that are compatible.

    Personality with personality. Looks with success.

    So what type of men are you looking to please, attract, and be involved with?

    • Damn, you're 24 and all that came from you. All I got to say is WOW!

    • =) thank you for making sense of my thoughts. At one point of my life, I realized it was a very difficult to accept and understand certain attitudes and demands people make, so I had to make sense of it or find alternative ways. And I hope my that answer is giving another perspective to women who focus too much on looks, or men who focus too much on success. It just comes down to what we expect from others will change us to what they expect of us.

  • Girl, do you think that these girls actually look that way? There is more make-up and airbrushing of the photos going on in those pics than you can imagine. Sure it looks good, too good in fact, but it's not reality. Have you ever seen a girl like that walking down the street? I know I haven't.

    Remember that "dove" commercial that has been out for a while now. I love that commercial, it's real. It portrays real women with all of their size differences.

    • Lol I'm a visual learner. What you see is what you get and I have seen heaps of "plastic" chicks like that where I'm from but man some of them got so much make up on looks like its caked? Well not sure if anyone would walk down the street trying to look like a porn star. Well? maybe the prostitutes?? But thanks I have to remember to come back to reality :)

  • Its just normal for a man to look at those pictures but it very unreasonable to expect everyone to look like that. it just takes a little reasoning. If your guy doesn't understand that let him go, he does not deserve you.

  • No guy really thinks all girls are like that , your boyfriend should like you for who you are and not what you look like

    don't disturb yourself cause you are pretty

    • Really? Yeah I hate women being demoralized like that but in a way I kinda envy their look? Really? I reckon I'm pretty sometimes emphasis on the word sometimes but above all I'm just average. I think its a girl thing where I just need to be reassured quite often.

What Girls Said 1

  • Walk down the street. How many girls do you see that look like that? Guys just expect you to be as attractive as you can be (naturally). They don't expect you to look like a porn star more than you expect guys to look like male models. Porn girls are just fetishes. How many of them are in real, normal relationships?

    • Yeah ay? I didn't think of it like that. Like are any of them in any proper normal relationships?? Thanks I really didn't think of that. All that was in my mind was that guys would do anything just to tap that? It does feel like a competition sometimes though