I've always had body image issues. I don't like my body, I wish I was thinner, with a smaller frame, longer torso, big breasts (DDs), a big round butt and long, slim legs. Instead I have small breasts, short waist (albeit small), wide hips and an average butt (not flat, but not as round as I'd like). I'm 5'5", 129 lbs.
To make things worse, my boyfriend has other preferences which I also can't accept. He likes big breasts, big round butts on skinny chicks. He says he likes my hips, but really, hips? I wish he would like my small breasts, or my butt. That he'd prefer these smaller assets, but no, he prefers big stuff. On skinny chicks! I'm not even that skinny. He has added a lot of hot girls to our band's Facebook page. When I've complained he has deleted them, but not without telling me I'm a nag and that those aren't important things for the relationship and that I shouldn't care about that stuff. That being jealous and envious is being childish, and that so what if they're hotter. He totally disregards my feelings about the issue, despite the fact that he knows how I feel about my body. He says I'm hot, but I know he thinks they're hotter and he thinks that's something I just have to deal with.
I've never told him another guy is hotter because frankly I don't feel that way, but I bet if I told him he should be taller, more muscular and that he should wax his chest (all things that I'm not attracted to anyway, lucky him) then he'd freak out! He can get insecure, I've seen him get insecure.
What can I do? Should I break up with him? I can't accept that I'll never be his perfect ten, and that seriously drives me crazy, even though I love him and he's perfect for me, if I'm not perfect for him then I'll never feel at ease. I just can't accept that, and his carefree attitude towards the matter, the fact that he refuses to talk about it and just disregards it as childish concerns is hurtful. I also hate my body, I absolutely wish I looked different, even though before I was with him, it wasn't this bad. But I just wish I could look different, sadly there are things that I can only fix with surgery, and others that I can't fix (like having a smaller frame or longer legs). I hate my body, no matter how much weight I lose I look sturdy, and I have small breasts which no guy I have ever met likes. I'm just not hot... guys don't even look at me =(
Most Helpful Guy
EVERY girl hates their body and one point or another. EVERY girl wants to change something about their body.
You know that blonde bombshell, perfect butt, hourglass figure, swimsuit model (imagine whichever hot girl you want here)? She hates her body, too! I bet you anything in the world she has AT LEAST one thing she wants to change about it, if not more.
Look at this article: link
This beauty queen died in the pursuit of the perfect ass. It's so ridiculous it makes my head hurt to even think about it. Girls just have this ingrained into their mind that they need to look perfect like barbie, or a pornstar, or britney spears, etc.
Well here's the truth: they don't!
Are there shallow guys out there? Of course, just like there are shallow girls out there. Some girls would never date me unless I had the perfect brad pitt body. Oh well, who cares. I don't want to be with those girls anyway.
Find someone that makes you feel good about who you are and the body you have. If your boyfriend doesn't do that, then sorry but he's not the right guy for you. The right guy for you is going to love you just as much if you gain 10 pounds as if you lose 10 pounds. To him you will always be beautiful and sexy.3
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