I'm Not Going To Change.

so I'm 16, and never had a boyfriend. I guess I'm shy but not that much. I mean, I keep trying to make myself look better and act different but I can't because it's just not me. I'm not unattractive or annoying or whatever else. if I really wanted to get with a guy I would let loose but that's is NOT who I am and I'm not going to hang out with the drunkies to gain popularity. I'm a well rounded good person who's friends with everyone. so I seem like the perfect person? why doesn't anyone give me a chance?

just because I'm shy doesn't mean you automatically out of the picture and no one wants to give you a chance. and I frankly don't want to come off as a sexual person, ehem, I don't want some right now.


What Guys Said 2

  • First of all, jeez, 16, where are you rushing to? I know you probably have friends who've had boyfriends, made out and perhaps had sex with guys. But in all honesty, you have your years well ahead of you and opportunities always rise.

    Trust me, if you're generally attractive, at least ONE guy is interested in you AT THIS VERY MOMENT. It is possible that this guy is someone you'd also want to get with. The only reason this guy isn't "giving you a chance" is because he's too shy or intimidated to do so.

    You're saying you try to make yourself act "different" - you probably mean acting in a slutty manner - this isn't the way to go about it. What you should do is seem more accessible, and even be a bit active just enough for guys to notice you.

    Other than unattractive girls, what girls never or rarely get approached to, do you know?

    And I'll tell you, the MOST attractive girls never or rarely get approached to because they seem inaccessible and intimidating - especially during high-school. Guys like to settle for the average girls because they are attractive just enough to be accessible but not attractive enough to be intimidating.

    And again, you have your years ahead of you - relax, enjoy life while you can, show your maturity and happiness, show that you're a friendly and accessible person and I assure you - guys WILL approach you.

    • No when I say different, I mean like change looks, not slutty manner, that's not who I am. and I know opportunities always rise but it's only because I'm the only one out of all my friends whose never had a boyfriend. sometimes I care and sometimes I don't, I just feel left out.

    • Show All
    • What makes hair look attractive in girls is how healthy it looks - doesn't matter if it's curly or smoth. Hair color doesn't matter either. So if you care about your hair and hairstyle, just make sure it's groomed. It's generally the same for everything, you need to focus on looking healthy. You don't have to change anything, only improve what already exists. Good looks, good smell and good character are only an indication of physical and mental health - that's attractiveness 101.

    • I completely agree.

  • If your situation is as you described it, then you shouldn't expect people to give you a chance. You should be prepared to go out and get it.

    If you have lots of friends, but nobody seems to find any sexual interest in you, it's probably because you don't come off as a sexual person. Quite frankly, nobody wants to be in a relationship with a robot. If you're finding that attractive guys aren't noticing you as dating material, flirt with them. You may be ready to have extra passionate sex, extra raunchy sex, or whatever, but if you don't communicate that then nobody is going to know. The same applies to love interest. If you don't communicate (and SHOW, actions speak louder than words) that you want to be somebody's girlfriend, then they aren't going to see you as one.


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