How do I give off the impression to females that I'm a datable guy?

I'm laid back, very sarcastic, I make a lot of small talk and flirting. just can't seem to attract a good decent smart girl that will take me seriously. I don't have one style, I can be hardcore, preppy, emo, gangster. get along with a lot of people. easy to talk to. very nice, maybe a little too nice?

my room is very dirty, but mostly because of my roommate, I don't sleep with sheets cause they don't survive on my bed. girls don't take to me too often, they either ignore me or they never stick around to hear more about me.
i'm not exactly the same cookie cutter guy that wants to mess around, I'm goofy, random, but those who know me wanna stick around cause they know I will take care of them... problem is that when I get into the "friend zone" I'm screwed


Most Helpful Girl

  • You sound just like me. I'm very sarcastic, laid back, and easy to talk to, and my room is messy (though I'm not hardcore, preppy, emo, or gangster).

    One reason people might not pay attention to you, is if you're sarcastic with people you don't know well. I have this problem all the time. People NEVER get when I'm joking, unless they know me well, and even then, sometimes they don't get it. The only people who always get my sarcasm are my siblings, who also tend to be sarcastic.

    So what I'm saying is, if people don't have a sense of humour, they won't appreciate yours, or may even be offended by a joke that they don't realize is a joke. Or possibly, they're put off or intimidated by your intelligence/ability to find something witty to say. Sometimes I wonder if that's why people never seem to notice me.

    There's hope. I think it just takes a girl with a sense of humour similar to yours. I would be thrilled if I met a guy with a sense of humour, and sarcasm.

    • Yeah that's the thing, I have my own sense of humor, and people who know me well know exactly what I'm talking about whenever I say something out of the ordinary

What Girls Said 3

  • goofy, random...your a perfect kind of guy...a sense of humor is a great quality but it takes a girl with a sense of humor to fully appreciate that..some people don't understand humor and take it as advice find a girl who is as humorous as you..wish I could find a guy like that :D

  • You just haven't met the right girl yet. Maybe your sarcasm is the thing that they don't stick around for. I'm not saying that meanly, for I'm a very sarcastic person too, but sometimes my husband can't tell if I'm joking or being serious when I'm sarcastic.And then he takes offense to it, or just doesn't get my joke. That's the only thing that I can think of, cause being too nice isn't a problem. Trust me.

  • hmm, what my first thought when you said you can be all those things (pretty, emo, ect.), is that maybe you're just hard to figure out. Maybe the girls around you look for a certain type of guy.

    On another note, you might be too sarcastic and flirty. No get me wrong, girls love love flirting. but girls might take you in as the annoying heart-breaker. You may come across too confident. Now I'm just talking about my experiences. Sarcasm is funny, but not to an extent where you annoy someone.

    Now, for the question about being dateable. when I look at ur question and utr pic, you seem like one of those guys who date tons of girls, who is very confident. You might even intimidate some girls.

    So, ou don't have to have a lable, just be yourself and the right girl will come along. :]

    • Problem is I don't date a lot of girls, but everyone gets the impression that I do

What Guys Said 2

  • OK, so I'm presuming that's you in the picture? My advice to you?

    1) Clean up your looks and your room

    No girl is gonna wanna go out if you have stubbles or a dirty look (which I think you have); same goes for a dirty room. A clean room and clean shaven, with smart haircut (not spiky) is always a better bet, as is working out in the gym on your build. Girls dig alpha-male type bods.

    2) Change of wardrobe (to be more acceptable to her social circle)

    If that is you on the left, your stuff looks too grungy my friend. Girls take to your clothes to be the person you portray, and grunge for some girls can be a real turn-off. Change the wardrobe to be a little bit more 'casual smart' and 'sociable' looking? Abercrombie or Espirit-style loose and relaxed clothing like jeans and Tees springs to mind (no jewellery)...because it means you look presentable to her folks/friends...who are VERY important for you to think about if she wants to consider you serious dating material...

    3) Stop being so goofy by developing mature confident attitude

    Girls tend to like guys who are confident and mature (responsible) about themselves/others but generally a little reserved and laid back (mysterious) and not letting her in on his past as much as he should. Its probably because you are sometimes acting 'too friendly' or 'goofy' around girls that's why they don't wanna know you, because girls like a bit of mystery to create sexual tension. So stop being so goofy, and be a little more 'grown up'. This way you'll attract more of the girls you like.

    At the end of the day you can still be sarky or emo/funny etc. but really confidence is more about being yourself and being happy with yourself...what is the best side of yourself you like to portray to girls? What would you like to share with them? This is what you should concentrate on.

    Remember the motto that girls want a guy at the end of the day...not a boy.

    Hope that helps.

    • Haha that picture was from a jersey shore party lol

      blunt but helpful, greatly appreiciated

  • dude. my advice,

    1. be a little more agressive. Seem dangerous. Bad boy. But do not over do that. do not.

    2. Clean your room.

    3. select a perfect style, something that compliments you completely. like me. example. I'm A Juggalo. Rock And Rap Gangsta Clown Emo Crazy Kid, face paint, axes, death, you know just stuff.

    find your click and go with it. don't change so often. it will mess you up socially.

    4. don't be too laid back. look like ur busy. it really helps. grils hate boring guys.

    i hope that helps dude!