Is there any trait in a woman that matters to men as much as her physical beauty?

What really matters to men?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I believe I cannot completely answer this question. To me, physical beauty doesn't matter that much at all. I don't care if your overweight, skinny, pretty, whatever. Nobody's perfect until you fall in love with them. Then they're the most person person in the whole world.

    For me, when I'm in love, she's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. She needs to be intelligent, caring, loving, kind, sense of humor, and an animal lover (because I have pets). We also need to be able to relate to each other and understand each other. Communication is always important. And when I say intelligent, I'm not talking genius. Just someone who has a decent education and can have an intelligent conversation. It also helps if she likes to be a goof and be nerdy. It's all fun stuff :)

    Definitely not looking for someone who is openly flirty with other guys. She must be faithful to the relationship 110%. I also don't like women who are always negative, hateful, racist, etc.

    But for me, physical beauty is just 10% of what I'm looking for. The other 90% is all about who she is as a person. If she makes me happy and feel complete, I'll never stop telling her how much of an amazing and beautiful person she is. Even if she was overweight and asked me if she looked fat in clothes or whatever, I'd honestly answer that she looks perfect. Cause to me, she really would be perfect ?

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What Guys Said 24

  • ''The average woman would rather have beauty over brains because the average man can see better than he can think.''

    That's one of my all-time favorite quotes :) I wish I knew the answer but if I had to guess I'd say confidence and a strong will. Guys hate it when a girl does the whole ''I'm fine'' thing when in fact there is something wrong... being upfront and blunt are some things guys love. If you have a problem lets fix it now no games. Another one I'd say is the potential to be a good mother. I know that sounds kinda weird but guys think about that kind of stuff sometimes.

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  • The way the media and entertainment have emphasised the importance of physical beauty in the last 50 years has had a catastrophic effect on the way men perceive women.

    The physical beauty or attractiveness is there only to attract, to assure either sex that here is the possibility of a good 'mate' to create the next generation with.

    If we are just looking for a one night stand then it is possible that some men or women will not be thinking about the long term at all, and that is all part of the throw-away attitude we often have nowadays.

    Those who think about the bigger picture need a thinking, considerate, open-minded attitude with a sense of humour to be a lot bigger than the physical beauty which has no depth.

    For some people physical beauty remains naturally with us for six decades and more, generally though it is all too temporary and sometimes a stroke can take a pretty face and devastate it - what is left if a man relies on beauty to create a "trophy" partner?

    To a large degree the question asked is likely to be answered differently by different ages, at our early post pubertal years we are hard wired to be most attracted to the most attractive because our hormones make us the most prepared we will ever be for conception, many of us are always 'randy' at this time because humankind [regardless of social convention] is designed to procreate at our fittest time and to live at least long enough to nurture our young. Growing old is a new experience in our latest two millennia.

    As we grow older we usually grow more accepting of less physical beauty in a possible partner because we are forced to realise how fragile that beauty is.

    What we forget so often is that there is non-physical beauty ... the sparkle in the eyes and the lovely surprises that a kind nature can spring up with and bring the best of ourselves out. Most real beauty is on the inside!

    My personal gripe with women's beauty is that some of those who possess it feel themselves infinitely superior to those who are not born pretty and cannot afford to have prettiness created. The pain and suffering their attitudes leave around them leave so many women with a huge self esteem issue which can last a life time.

    I would rather have a sparkling-eyed sense of humour as true beauty any day ... and lets face it, when you have had a family leave home and there are two of you together to talk by the fire ... lost physical beauty is not something you want to talk about that much, you need inner creativity and humour.

    Many years ago I stood before Botticelli's painting 'Primavera' and I heard one man say to his lady; "those women look wonderful ... but they aren't 'real' - they are like Hollywood starlets - more for worship than to link arms with!"

    The couple were a similar age to my own now ... I noticed they were holding hands as they left the gallery, much beauty there in both their natures even though time had dealt out 'laughter lines'.

    Who can really know what beauty is?



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    • Is there anything men desire and want more than sex with beautiful, young women, though?

    • Pineappleshortcare, I suppose a completely shallow man might only want sex with a woman, and there are many of those; many shallow women too. A thoughtful man cherishes the way a woman perceives the world and him. We have made sex over-important just as we have exterior beauty. A person should be worth so much more than a series of orgasms. If the sex is lost due to illness or an accident what else is left in a shallow relationship?

  • all guys ever want is a down 2 earth non high maintainance girl that would love them regardless of what happens...a woman that will always make you feel like a man and never undermine you.

    If we had $5 do our name...she'll smile and say, lets cook some rice loool I hate rice...but you know what I mean!...genuine love regardles of material goods loool I'm far from broke...but I'm just saying...my number 1 ex that ill rememba for the rest of my life was the one that was their wen I had nothing...and we halved a small pizza 2gether lol and we were happy...that was real love!

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  • She has to have some idea of just who she is,

    what she believes,

    what she has made of her life at the point I meet her

    Can talk to me and with me on somethng else besides...Dancing with the Stars

    and American Idol

    She should be able to compete with me on some physical level.

    and ...she has to have a beautiful, firm, well shaped butt..

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  • Sense of humour, intelligence, confidence, drive for success...

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  • Kindness and compassion are the qualities I admire that are readily accessible to nearly everyone. However a profound skepticism that can only be achieved though intense personal crisis is best of all. Basically, having the attitude 'You are so goddamn stupid!' floating in the back of your mind at all times.

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  • Me personall, that I can TRUST this girl to not LIE and CHEAT.

    I don't particularily care for anything MORE than that.

    But these days, THAT seems like too much to ask for.

    /end rant. - Sero.

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  • Willingness to try something new. I can't stand a pretty face who never changes her routine to try a new place to eat or hang out.

    Also, someone who is willing to get sweaty and doesn't find it gross.

    Someone who gets my comedy.

    And above all, someone who is not as dumb as a rock, and this include smart girls who act clueless to be cute.

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  • Cute, short, loves to laugh. The end.

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  • A sense of excitement and fun, maturity and fidelity, as well as a caring and compassionate side.

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  • 1) Intellegence

    2) Sexuality. You have to be into some freaky stuff. Nothing gross but def. exciting and experimental and nasty

    3) Personality. You have to be a ball of fire, while being refined all at the same time. At least for me

    If you have all those, I could give a damn about beauty. Hope it helped!

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  • I believe so, her feminine energy. That means she acts and behaves like a woman, not like a man. It is hard to explain in detail it is something I just can feel stronger or weaker in some women. I remember being very turned on by a woman in her late 40s, she must have had very strong feminine energy =)

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  • Hmmm... I like a girl who's happy a lot. Cause if she is then I am. If the girl was bitchy all the time and complained well I'd say f*** it and dump her.

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  • A good personality. Looks only gets you so far.

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  • -Charm

    -Charisma

    -Intellect

    -Spontaneity

    -Good heart

    -Funny

    The above traits are JUST as important to me as looks...I've turned down hotties (even a model or two) to date avg. looking girls whom I just felt so comfortable with...

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  • Most people have a sense of humor. I think that women need to have an appreciation for dark humor. Laughing at other people's misfortune is cruel, but it can be a lot of fun sometimes. Don't be so straitlaced about it!

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  • she has to be exactly who she is. not change things for me that's not how it works. she has to be sweet and caring. intelligence is not so much an issue.

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  • It definitely has to be their smile!

    Other than that..

    1. Really sweet & nice personality

    2. Passive & Confident

    3. Sense of humor

    4. Etc, It goes on~ but then it is just going into personal preference~

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  • how she treats other people, what kind of person she is and what kind of sense of humor she has.

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  • laid back, can't stand a girl uptight about everything!

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  • it depends on the guy

    i like personality alot

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  • Honesty and for her not to be a skanky hoe haha

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  • booty !

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  • Sign of intellect, whether it be sagacity, sense of humor, or creativity.

    A caring personality. I don't know why, but this is a must for me. I'm not even big on volunteering and all, but if I find out a girl does that, her attractiveness goes through the roof.

    ^ 2 huge things for me. Without them, she might as well be a billboard model with a cardboard personality.

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What Girls Said 7

  • The ability to understand that men are wired completely different than us. To accept that when he gets off work he needs at least 30 minutes to himself to unwind and get into "home" mode, that yes he occasionally will drink from the milk carton and it's ok, that he will occasionally tune us out and focus on the game, that he DOES need time with "the boys" and that doesn't incluse us. Overall I think men want a woman who will accept him for who he is, is confident in herself and knows what she wants. A woman who will not play games and will come right out and say what is on her mind, and respects/admires her man, and herself. Am I in the ballpark gentlemen? :)

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    • I love your answer! My husband would have answered "she has to have a brain and needs to know how to use it" That pretty much sums up what you said.

    • " When he gets off work he needs at least 30 minutes to himself to unwind and get into "home" mode, that yes he occasionally will drink from the milk carton and it's ok, that he will occasionally tune us out and focus on the game, that he DOES need time with "the boys" and that doesn't incluse us... "

      - You could just change He to She, & it would still apply to LOTS of people.

      Especially raised as such. Lots of this stuff is just a part that everyone is taught to PLAY... & We do.

  • Menwant a woman with a good clean soul, first of all., If they can find her. Hard in the modern USA

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  • I know beauty is what attracts men initially but to go to the next level with a decent man you will need other characteristic as well. Beauty is only skin deep.

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  • Guys that like me say that besides my looks they like how I am confident, adventurous, don't care about money, enjoy the little things in life, can be rough but I'm still sweet, how I care so much for everyone, I'm smart but I don't act like it much or I don't act like I know everything, I play a lot of sports (gettin my 6pack back), I don't know ha they say I can just make a room light up if that makes sense lol they like how even though I work for record labels and have connections to a lot of people I don't act stuck up or like I'm better than everyone else. I know a lot of this stuff has come from the bad stuff that's happened in my past and it's all thanks to my brother that I'm the person I am. Even though he is shocked that I turned down modeling for sports lol ha but yeahhh those things I think.

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  • the will to have sex?

    xD

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  • My boyfriend say he finds these things most important; Openness, loyalty, loving, caring, responsible and humar most important;)

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  • i'm not a guy, but when I've seen girls that weren't very pretty but still had a guy (a relationship, not just a regular sex partner), she was usually very caring, on the conservative side, and sweet and usually girly but not always. I don't know if this is traits that guy loves or maybe its a coincidence, but I have noticed this.

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