Is it bad that I'm not attracted to my boyfriend?

I'm not really attracted to my boyfriend. We have been together for about 3 months and I'm realizing I'm not always attracted to him, Sometimes but other times I'm not. A lot of my friends tell me that I can do better, looks wise because I'm a pretty girl, but looks aren't everything I suppose...but I'm just wondering do you think in the long run having a boyfriend I'm not attracted to, could be a downfall for our relationship?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well first off… I’m glad your not leading your boyfriend on. The first thing you need to do, is to talk to him about how your feeling, express what‘s going on rather than leading him on, because in that aspect it‘s going to have a downfall within itself.

    I was recently thinking about attraction, and that attraction can lead to a break-ups, because of curtain areas in which things are lacking. One in particular is the sexual attraction we get from others. And I’d hate to say this, but looks are a visual attraction, and if that visual attraction isn’t bringing you to that state of sexual attraction, then things need to change. But of course as I agree with you 100%… Looks aren’t everything, and what attraction is, is based on other variables rather than the visual attraction. Like for example, some people love characteristics in which the person has a great sense of humor, and has a lot of charisma, charm, and who that person is, rather than what he looks like. So in a sense it can be a sexual attraction within itself, and maybe the guy you’ve been dating has lost some of that charm as it were. You need to find out what that loss of attraction is, and maybe things could change in a better direction, but the first thing you need to do, is to talk to him, and talk about what you’ve been feeling these past months, what ever the time frame is. But things need to change in that direction in which it was before, or maybe it’s not the guy for you.

    Anyway I hope things work out for the best…. Much Love


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What Guys Said 1

  • See this is the problem with the world today! If you're only in the relationship for the looks then yes it will be the downfall of your relationship and countless others. Looks aren't every thing dear! If he doesn't beat you, if he is faithful, if he hasn't done anything wrong to you, etc. If you have a good guy don't let him go, just because you think you can do better in the look category. See in life, it has a funny way of going around. For example, you break up with this guy, and you decide I can do better, and try to find the most handsome guy you can find. He ends up being a complete D-Bag. It may happen but it may not happen. Just be careful in your decision.

    Ps: I'm only telling you because you said that your friends tell you can do better, because you are pretty. To me it seems like they are trying to feed your ego and your listening to them. Make up your own mind by yourself on this decision, don't let your friends feed your ego anymore.

    • I Agee... I really believe that. It's so true of what she said. It's not about the looks, but sometimes it is. I hate to say that, but its true in some ways. But that's were socity as a whole has changed. Where all looking for that attraction when it comes too the looks department, rather than the attraction within itself. In reality do we love someone for what they look like, or do we love someone for who they are on the inside? And that's what we need to change.

What Girls Said 1

  • I was in this kind of relationship once. The downfall was that our sexual urge didn't match. I turned him on easily but not the other way around. This made him frustrated and sort of made him passively resent him. While everyone is different, that is what I experienced.