Is it bad to get involved? HELP!

There is this 15 year old at work that I get along really well with. At first I did not know his age and there was a real attraction and connection. We would talk and things came easy for us. He also looks to be about my age or older. Then the subject came up for both us having feelings for each other. And I was thinking yes this will be perfect! Finally going to meet a great guy and have an amazing relationship. Then he told me his age, which is 15, and I am 19. So this kind of sucks for me. I broke contact and barely talk to him now. But at the same time I still have feelings for him, yet I also want to get over these feelings considering the age gap. Do any of you guys think it would be OK to pursue this or should I just give it up all together? I mean if her were older, obviously it would be OK. But it's a tough spot right now. Oh god I kind of hate myself for liking him but at the same time I can't help it!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The cause of problem in this case is that you are looking at yourself using other people's eyes. Many do. And that's one major reason why many are unhappy, among others. This is one formidable psychological obstacle to get over for billions of people. But hey, it is YOUR happiness. YOU are responsible for it. Suggestion, talk to him. Apologize for the sudden withdrawal without a single explanation, it probably hurted him. Remember: YOUR happiness is YOUR responsibility.

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    • I know but the age gap is weird and frowned upon in society. But at the same time I can't help but like him. But if he were 18 and I were 22 it would be OK. I hate society's strange ways. Also I would not want to get in trouble with the law or his family or mine.

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    • I agree. So for now I just think we should be friends and when he's older who knows.

    • This is good course of action. It isn't going to be easy for both of you; the challenge lies in controlling your sex hormones. Again, both of you need to bring this onto the table and identify this issue, as something you have to deal with. Anytime your gut feel fires an uneasy/uncomfortable feeling, make sure you heed it no matter what, step back and cool it off.

What Guys Said 1

  • Just wait a couple of years if you still feel the same go for it but not a good idea right now, jail bait much...

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What Girls Said 1

  • He's 15 and you're 18+. bad idea. no matter how cool or cute you think he is do not do it. keep him as a platonic friend. it's illegal and its like come on now. this kid is probably a freshman/sophomore in high school and someone your age would be in college. it doesn't matter how old he LOOKS. due to all the hormones in our food kids are maturing at a way faster rate, it doesn't make it right. no offense intended, but what is your maturity level compared to guys your own age? I'm kind of wondering why a 15 year old boy would be appealing to you in that way? you can't help your feelings but don't act on them

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    • This guy, believe it or not, does not come off as a 15 year old and life experiences have made him very mature. And offense intended, I am at the maturity level I should be for my age. And if you did not notice I said I did not know his age until way later. I thought he was my age or older. It was just recent I found out his age and we had been good friends for months.

    • And its not like I go around looking for younger guys or hang out with them. This just sort of happened, it was a fluke.

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