Is there any way for an ugly guy to become attractive short of winning the lottery?

I've been called ugly since I was a little kid and I still get it now - I can make people laugh, be everyone's friend but when it comes down to it girls just DO NOT want to be with me. Yeah, I get laid occasionally but it's almost always because they were horny and I was "there" and not because they like me (this isn't me being an ass, they really tell me this). Also a couple friends told me the only way I'm getting a girl is if I find a really fat, really old drunk one which didn't help with my self-esteem.

And before you say I should lower my standards, I'm not picky at all. I go for any girl that I am attracted to and many that I'm not.

A couple girl friends tried to "help" me out but their solution was to spend a LOT of money on clothes and a nose job (I was in a motorcycle accident so have facial scarring, plus I never had nice skin anyways). As we went around the store I realized that I couldn't afford what they were suggesting clothing wise, much less the surgical part. I mean I could if I sold off my motorcycles and "ate top ramen" three nights a week if you catch my drift. To be honest it would've been half a year's earnings.

Is this the only way to become attractive as a guy? I mean I'm funny and I'm in okay shape (I'm not atlas but I'm not fat, I can go out and ride 10-20 miles on a bicycle no problem, hike whatever) but when it comes down to it the only solutions I'm offered cost $$$$.

So should I buy lottery tickets or just ignore women for the most part and live my life?

Updates:
Thanks snacky. My real question is does it just take money to be attractive? Because despite what you hear every solution ends up being $$$$ oriented. More ugly, more $$$$ to get from point A to point B. Maybe I'm just surrounded by rich d***wads.
Rockmusic, I wouldn't come down on interracial dating like that I've met plenty of nice girls who aren't white and plenty of white girls who are dumb, a coworker of mine is a black girl from Oakland and she's an uptight Republican - no ebonics there!
I hear you on the metal thing though, I was in a band for a few years as well and I still have long hair and a few rings/piercings and people are damned weird about it. Gotta change your look, get a haircut - hell it's like the 50's all over again.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • to OP: I'm not necessarily condemning interracial dating here, but I am pointing out there are certain conditions where certain girls drop their standards. Its a double standard that I'm not willing to tolerate. Sure there's plenty of nice people in every race, but I very much dislike B/C interracial dating is so popular. Not being attracted to women of other races, I think it's unfairly dwindled my options (hence my grudge). I randomly asked a friend once, "So, how many white girls do you think are dating black guys in [this city]? and he said "I think.. All of them"

    btw, concerning hair, The only times I ever met any girls was when my hair was longer. I tried it with short hair and nothing good happened. Don't keep it extremely long, just a bit grown out. I keep the look that I needed a haircut two months ago. Very long hair on most guys simply looks dirty/ratty.

    If you play music well, Keep at it and encourage young people to take up an instrument. By the way being in bands with others who have plenty of social resources is a good way to meet new people who are into what you like to do.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Hey sorry to hear it that really sucks! :( I believe there is someone special/the right person out there for everyone. Don't go changing your appearance unless it's something you really want to do for your own confidence not some girl. It shouldn't be necessary you sound like you have plenty going for you.

    I once lived with a nice young man who had really really bad burn scars, you wouldn't know what he looked like before. It was sad :(. But guess what he had a girlfriend :). I never met her but flatmates said she was lovely. Best of luck to you.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Money does not buy love, you've heard that before? I've had *some* money, I bought a house and a few nice things. Nothing elevates my status. I was attacked with a blunt weapon in a surprise gang fight and got hurt pretty bad, the result is that I constantly wear prescription sun glasses everywhere I go and believe me I am treated like the plague for that. I think I look fairly normal besides constantly wearing glasses.. but who knows. I'm an exceptionally talented metal guitarist, and in 1995 that worked for me (not that I did it to meet girls).. but today it's as about as impressive as accidentally crapping my pants. I live in an area where the only people who even like rock music are over 40, have kids, been married and divorced.. There's no one into music to jam with.. There's no people with anything in common to hang out with, have a beer with, or do anything. To top it off I work as a clerk. I'm in good standing with my boss, but dealing with any attractive female customers is depressing. Some will briefly talk to me - returning a polite greeting.. some say nothing at all and some have been outwardly insulting. I mean stuff that's on a personal level. None have been willing to talk to me beyond "hello" and "how are you", but they'll gab with my co-worker. I get complaints about how I look, I have even been reported to the police several times for simply restocking the shelves and "looking suspicious" to customers. I suppose some thief is going to go get a pricing "gun" and start restocking the beer? please. The whole reason I bought a house and moved to begin with was to stop the police from bothering me every time I walked to work, or to the store. I mean I don't do drugs, I'm dependable, trustworthy and all that but it doesn't matter - 'Avoid at all costs' must be written on my face.

    Then there's something else the customers do that really offends me, more than the rudeness. I prefer white girls, I'm white, I think it's natural. I never really cared much about interracial dating until practically all of the girls started doing it. I thought girls 'don't want no scrubs' but I constantly see them with guys that (a. have no jobs (b. don't drive (c. have been in jail/prison (d. drink a lot, or do drugs (e. have children from other girls and/or (f. have two girlfriends, as long the guy they're with is black. A few of them are with white guys, but they're with the best/most blessed white guys they can find. I know a handful of average looking men who have jobs, but aren't rich who have been single for a long time. I see this as a double standard that's become part of the culture, & it's wrong. Let me get this straight girls, ruining your life is better than treating me like a person?

    Besides, I can't get close to a girl who hates my kind of music, speaks in ebonics and has questionable character, or has already spent herself.. though its not as if I didn't try to overlook that a few times.

    Never married, no kids.. and old too soon?

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  • You got laid and you're ugly? Congrats man. I envy you. You're way ahead of me. I'm ugly and got nothing.

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    • I don't think it takes more money. I'm sure that would help but it's not a necessity. You'll just have to use more effort with women. As the stupid lame phrase goes, there's someone out there for you.

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