I mean, people, mostly other women (and no, not feminists) are always saying that wanting to look attractive to men is something vain and not the most important thing in life. But I mean, is it not instinctual? Of course we have other priorities in life, but is wanting to be attractive really "vain"? Even now that I'm single and not looking, I constantly worry about what men will think of my appearance, and when I was with my ex, I was constantly trying to look attractive for him, not to let go of myself, and if we were going somewhere, trying to look my best so that I'd look as good as other women there and he wouldn't be disappointed.
I know it sounds a bit pathetic that I'm that way, but I'm wondering is it not natural and instinctive? I mean, men have an instinct to look at attractive women, to procreate, it's ingrained in them, well, then it's only logical for women to look their best to attract good suitors to procreate with, right? But other women constantly criticize me for caring about my looks, they say I'm vain and insecure.
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Of course, anything we do can be blamed on our instincts, that way we can absolutely shun off the responsibility of our actions and make all our thinking void, considering that by saying it was all there due to a subconscious information, you achieve absolutely nothing.
It's in what you've learnt and think you're supposed to do. Sure, most people have a basic need to be accepted by others, but I think partially, that's also socially pressured "you need friends, you need a girlfriend" etc etc etc..
By the way, you are "insecure" because if you were certain of your appearance, you would be in the belief of being attractive without being worried.0