I'm single and older then most on this site. I take care of myself I'm healthy, attractive and dress well. I also work out so I have a pretty decent body. I love getting dressed because it makes me feel good sexy and elegant. I'm a strong confident women, friendly and well liked. I know guys look at me and there are some that I know like me. So why can't I get a date? Do you think that the way I dress is coming off as being desperate? I don't dress like I'm going out to a club or anything but I do dress in a way that complements me.
Up until when I was in my twenties, I used to categorize female adults in two classes, the "old" ladies and the sexually desirable women. As for the men, I categorized them as the "old" men and the young punks. Silly, eh? That's teenager for you! Anyway, as I grow older, I noticed more and more women my age conform into my young-self "old" ladies type. The same goes with men. More and more men my age conform into the "old" men type. Some age well some don't. It depends on how well they take care of themselves.
I don't know your age but I think you are not far from me. If you are my age, then I must say that men our age who take care themselves well are few and far in between. The ones who don't will most definitely be intimidated by you because what is increasingly become considered as normal for people my age (around here) is, and this is why I answer this question anonymously, usually out of shape with sagging leathery skin. If you can get away with a little pudge and minimal receding hairline, then you are lucky.
What I am saying is, you being in good shape, made most of us nervous and insecure. We'll think: "What about if she sees me naked? Would she throw up a little in her mouth? I don't think I can stand it!". Or something like that.
That's what I think.
Good job in keeping yourself healthy, though! Keep it up!
You say you are attractive but to me there are several kind of attractractive women, especially according to the style of clothes you wear. What kind of attractive women do you think you are?
Second question: do you think that you are approachable from a guy point of view? I mean do these guys feel they can match up to the kind of job and way of living you have? Don't they think that you are well happier than they are and that they can't bring anything to your life, instead they need you more than you seem to need them?
Not really sure how you dress but I subconsciously go for natural looking types rather than tons of make up or plastic chicks. Like I'd go for the Anne Hatheway or J Love Hewitt type over the girls next door playboy chicks.
Normally guys are known to swarm around women and try really hard but not all guys do this. For me when I see 8 guys around 1 hot girl in a club it's a huge turn off. Most of my gfs are the ones that approached me. I'd say if you like a guy be honest about it and find a way to let them know even though most women are deathly afraid of this for some odd reason.
If you in good shape its hard to imagine an older guy that's single being totally uninterested. I'm more impressed with a healthy body than a great face because she puts in the effort.
It could just be you come off as confident and some guys are intimidated by this.
What do you mean by nicely? Wearing pretty flattering clothes doesn't make anyone look high maintenance. Some younger people say having shirts tucked in is geeky but I say that's bull & it does look dressed up. I personally like it when girls dress up but if the look nice at all I'm down!
Smile warmly, complement the men and make them feel good. They're wary of you and your dangerous power to crush their egos. Show them that you are positive and they will be thrilled at what a great catch you are.
dress what make you comfortable & makes you confident.
Yes it is quite important, to me does make a girl look more appealing
If you're dressing up and strutting around all confident men might assume you get hit on all the time and figure they don't have a chance with so much competition. I know you say you're friendly but just make sure if you don't already that you smile at these guys you're talking about and look in their eyes so they know you want them to talk to you.
your going to the wrong places you mentiond clubs 45 and over a nice bar would be better maybe your dress is to chic not relaxed enough also a man likes a open friendly face so make sure you laugh and smile