Guys what do you think about a woman that dresses nicely?

I'm single and older then most on this site. I take care of myself I'm healthy, attractive and dress well. I also work out so I have a pretty decent body. I love getting dressed because it makes me feel good sexy and elegant. I'm a strong confident women, friendly and well liked. I know guys look at me and there are some that I know like me. So why can't I get a date? Do you think that the way I dress is coming off as being desperate? I don't dress like I'm going out to a club or anything but I do dress in a way that complements me.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Up until when I was in my twenties, I used to categorize female adults in two classes, the "old" ladies and the sexually desirable women. As for the men, I categorized them as the "old" men and the young punks. Silly, eh? That's teenager for you! Anyway, as I grow older, I noticed more and more women my age conform into my young-self "old" ladies type. The same goes with men. More and more men my age conform into the "old" men type. Some age well some don't. It depends on how well they take care of themselves.

    I don't know your age but I think you are not far from me. If you are my age, then I must say that men our age who take care themselves well are few and far in between. The ones who don't will most definitely be intimidated by you because what is increasingly become considered as normal for people my age (around here) is, and this is why I answer this question anonymously, usually out of shape with sagging leathery skin. If you can get away with a little pudge and minimal receding hairline, then you are lucky.

    What I am saying is, you being in good shape, made most of us nervous and insecure. We'll think: "What about if she sees me naked? Would she throw up a little in her mouth? I don't think I can stand it!". Or something like that.

    That's what I think.

    Good job in keeping yourself healthy, though! Keep it up!

    Have you tried younger men?

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    • Younger men are good to look at but I rather meet someone within my age group. It would be graet if we didn't judge a book by its cover but its contents. Thanks for sharing.

    • No problem.

      To defend my young-self, I didn't treat people differently based on looks. I gave everyone respect they deserve equally. I just didn't ogle the ones I didn't find attractive. Still do now.

      My point was that many men can get insecure. Easier than you think, maybe. Especially the boisterous and loud ones.

What Guys Said 10

  • First sorry for my english ;)

    Can I ask you a couple of questions?

    You say you are attractive but to me there are several kind of attractractive women, especially according to the style of clothes you wear. What kind of attractive women do you think you are?

    Second question: do you think that you are approachable from a guy point of view? I mean do these guys feel they can match up to the kind of job and way of living you have? Don't they think that you are well happier than they are and that they can't bring anything to your life, instead they need you more than you seem to need them?

    Bye, Alexis.

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    • Alexis- I may be unapproachable, idk. I've always thought I was a friendly person but who knows. I work in a casual but professional environment. This is what I would wear - dresses, skirts, skirts with jackets, or two-piece suits or sets, skirts that are split at or below the knee, dress shirts, and dress slacks. Shoes - boots, flats, dress heels. I like to wear clothing that are tailored to my body type.

      I'm slim, tan complexion with long dark hair. Honestly I don't know what they think

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    • Alexis- I was just wondering if dressing up or being the way I am was a turn off to some men. I'm glad you don't see me as being a snob. I can kick back in the Mountains with my stilettos, haha, or chill in a city club with my cowboy boots and be just as content! :D Thanks, wish me luck!



    • Haha I wish you good luck :) You seem like someone quite energetic. Try slowing down your pace so that men can keep up with you ;)

      Bye, Alexis.

  • Not really sure how you dress but I subconsciously go for natural looking types rather than tons of make up or plastic chicks. Like I'd go for the Anne Hatheway or J Love Hewitt type over the girls next door playboy chicks.

    Normally guys are known to swarm around women and try really hard but not all guys do this. For me when I see 8 guys around 1 hot girl in a club it's a huge turn off. Most of my gfs are the ones that approached me. I'd say if you like a guy be honest about it and find a way to let them know even though most women are deathly afraid of this for some odd reason.

    If you in good shape its hard to imagine an older guy that's single being totally uninterested. I'm more impressed with a healthy body than a great face because she puts in the effort.

    It could just be you come off as confident and some guys are intimidated by this.

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    • I thought guy's like confident women. I wear very little makeup and hate lipstick! but I do like to dress nice. Do you like dressing up when you go to work? Or do you just throw on what ever and walk out the door? Lets say your not that into clothes its just not important to you. Would a women that dresses nice be a turn off?

    • Most guys like a confident women, at least the healthy ones I imagine. I just meant some guys are either intimidated by confident women or they prefer more of a subservient personality. I work in the med field so most the time I'm in scrubs or professional clothes. I find girls that dress up to be a turn on, like how my girlfriend looks when she goes to work. When she gets off work she puts on sweat pants attire which isn't really as nice.

    • I don't have to wear dresses or skirts, regular slacks and shirt will do. But I like wearing the nice dresses and skirts/suits. I put an effort in how I look, I guess you could say I'm vain. I've always been attracted to a well dressed man, now those things don't seem so important to me. They do, have to be clean and some what presentable. I do the same as your girlfriend when I get home. Its good to know it may hurts the guys eyes a little bit. haha, I will remember that. Thanks

  • Not desperate, no. If anything, it makes you seem out of reach, or possibly high maintenance. Either of which are intimidating because what it basically tells men is that you come at a price.

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    • I'm not high maintenance, but I am vain. What do you consider a girl that is high maintenance? Also what do you mean by. A women that comes at a price?

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    • Your saying that girls/women that put a little effort in how they appear, are shallow. Well, I'm not shallow. So your just attracted to, girls that really don't care too much about how they look?

      That's interesting.

    • i'm not saying they're shallow. you read way too much into it.

  • What do you mean by nicely? Wearing pretty flattering clothes doesn't make anyone look high maintenance. Some younger people say having shirts tucked in is geeky but I say that's bull & it does look dressed up. I personally like it when girls dress up but if the look nice at all I'm down!

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    • I mean, nice as in elegant, yet sexy. I like wearing skirts and dresses I especially love pencil skirts, and tailored shirts. Anyway I like this man, but he looks like a five year old dresses him. Lol

      I was curious like maybe it would be a turn off to some men. I suppose to some it would be.

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    • I also wear my shirts tucked in and will wear a nice belt. Thank you

    • VERY sexy! You must look SOOO pretty...Keep doing what you're doing...

  • If I like her I tend to think "she looks nice". If I don't like her but it is a nice outfit I tend to think "nice outfit".

    Presenting yourself well doesn't seem desperate. It shows that you take a pride in the fine person that you are.

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  • Smile warmly, complement the men and make them feel good. They're wary of you and your dangerous power to crush their egos. Show them that you are positive and they will be thrilled at what a great catch you are.

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    • Thanks, I can sometimes be serious and a little reserved, around someone I don't know well, so I have remember to always smile and complement them. The smile part is easy, I have to work on the complementing part. Thanks a lot!

    • Take a look at my article here:

      link

      It explains how risky it is to extend oneself into a dangerous situation. Build a comfy bird house and you will have birds in your yard!

    • I read your article and it makes more sense to me now. Thank you.

  • Ur doin nothin wrong. just bet your strikingly beautiful and confident and the men currently around you in your life just feel too insecure self-conscious or unworthy to ask you out

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    • Hmm, that sucks but I think you could be right. The guys that ask me out are the ones I don't want. And its it has nothing to do with there looks, its because they are over confident, and that is a turn off to me. The one that I do want, just looks at me, that's why I asked, because its confusing. I wished that the self-conscious or insecure guys would give a girl like me a shot. I'm actually a nice person.

  • dress what make you comfortable & makes you confident.

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  • Yes it is quite important, to me does make a girl look more appealing

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  • If you're dressing up and strutting around all confident men might assume you get hit on all the time and figure they don't have a chance with so much competition. I know you say you're friendly but just make sure if you don't already that you smile at these guys you're talking about and look in their eyes so they know you want them to talk to you.

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    • I wish that there was competition.:-( There is one man I really do like and he likes me too. But I don't know what's wrong, he has flirted with me and I with him, but nothing. I just don't want to come off as desperate or like I'm trying to hard. Thanks for the advice.

What Girls Said 3

  • When you're too dolled up, you don't seem approachable to every guy.

    Dress approachable, nice, clean and not over the top - and then if a guy catches your eye, just approach him and don't wait for them to make the first move. They will appreciate it.

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  • your going to the wrong places you mentiond clubs 45 and over a nice bar would be better maybe your dress is to chic not relaxed enough also a man likes a open friendly face so make sure you laugh and smile

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    • Meeting guys in clubs has never been a problem for me, that's easy. That's not what I'm looking for. I was referring to day to day normal stuff and how men felt about a certain type of woman. I'm trying to get a feel about how guys think.

    • i suppose there types of kind of woman really I think this is 1 for a man to answer you

  • They think you are a very nice lady.

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    • That's sweet of you. Thank You.

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