Due to being at work at extremely early hours, the guy I have been dating usually sends me a couple texts to say hello and such to start off our day. Here is our conversation this morning………
GUY: You deserve the truth. I’m mortified to tell you because I don’t want to hurt you in any way. I’ve got to slow WAY down with us because I don’t want to hurt you. It’s killing me.
ME: Were we going at a fast rate? A little confused here.
GUY: Well no. It’s just that I like you immensely of course but I am dealing with some stuff and I just got to be very careful with you. I just don’t want to hurt you.
ME: Look I am here if you ever need to talk about the stuff you are going through. All I ask for is complete honesty, do not lead me on, and don’t make promises you cannot keep.
GUY: That’s the main thing. I don’t want to lead you on. Life happens so fast sometimes and my head is kinda spinning right now. You are a great great girl.
ME: Just say it if you want to end whatever we are together. For the record, I don’t want us to end. You are a great guy and I truly hope you realize that.
Since 9AM I have not heard a word back. To be truthful – I am scared. He really is a great guy and he has overcome so much. And there is something there between us – maybe something big. How do I handle this? I feel jolted. I feel like I should have him sit right in front of me and tell him he is worthy enough to be loved. Then there is the side of me thinking maybe he wants an out. Maybe he played me like a fiddle. Anyway, back tracking for you to Friday - we had a great time then out of the blue Saturday morning he sends me a message saying he is going on an impromptu camping trip with buddies. Then nothing until this morning. Ugh.
Most Helpful Guy
Sounds to me like he is not ready for a comittment, but thinks you are. He probabably does really like you, but may not want to be in a full relationship (for whatever reason) at this time. Maybe he is not sure he is in love with you and is afraid one day you will pop out the L word and he won't know how to respond (we guys get that way, we start feeling trapped and get all sweaty, not a real pretty picture). By saying he doesn't want to lead you on, it tells me he is not ready for this. My opinion on how to handle it would be to talk to him about it. Tell him you are confused and tell him how you feel about him, but give him a clear out (if that's ok with you.) tell him its fine if you want to go slow, that you want to be with him and are willing to work with it. You should make sure to ask him if this means he will be dating other girls. This is not the impression I get from what's here, but it would be a possible reason and you have to make sure your ok with that or not.