Did I do something wrong?

Me and my dude have been together for a year now and everything is going good. Until today, we were texting and he told me that he is going to see a therapist and I asked him why. He told that he is not happy with his life at all. I asked him is it me. he said no he happy around me he loves wen we spend time together, do the things we do, and more. And he miss me I don't know what to do. HELP!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well first off, I don't think you have anything to worry about as far as you two are concerned in the relationship. He doesn't seem to be less attracted to you or on the brink of break-up. A lot of guys would have pulled the excuse "I just need time alone" and such if that were the case. It seemed like he told you that for the sake of trust and such. Probably wants you there for him (not literally at the therapist), but just wants comfort. Ask him to talk to you and see what he thinks AND support his decision to see a therapist. I think many people could benefit with at least one or two therapy sessions, but are too afraid or proud to do so. So the fact that he's looking into it should be a good thing, because he's willing to take action to try and get things on the plus side of life. Be there for him, listen to him, talk to him and make him feel special. Every so often, a little "thank you" at a random moment for a random thing will make his day.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Do new things with him, and be supportive to him. Make him feel that you would do what you can for his happiness.

    Study the Maslow's Hierarchy of needs, it's simple. And you will know what is missing in him. This is something many psychiatrists or therapists would forget to check. And I think it should be on the top of the check list when you feel down or meaningless. It is very simple, and it says what are the steps/stages to reach happiness in a human life.

    The "Sex" in Maslow's Hierarchy of needs is often misinterpreted. It generally means the pleasures of sensory perceptions, not just carnal pleasure. The word "Sex" in psychology often means this; It is like, listening to music, watching TV, fragrances, delicacies and physical comfort (plus carnal pleasure).

    Don't think it is any of your fault. Most probably, the reason for his unhappiness is not related to you. Just, give him his own time and be there for him when he needs you.

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  • If he's got a therapist, it doesn't really sound like there's much left for you to do. He's in the hands of trained professionals, so why second guess everything you've done, especially since he's not given any indication that you make him unhappy?

    Just sit back and continue being awesome. Be supportive and helpful and all that general good stuff.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I think if you truly love you, you must remain by his side during this tough time in his life. The focus is not you nor your relationship with him, it's him.

    If he feels his life has reached a point where he is in need of outside help, by all means, support him. Clearly he has assured you that it is not you or your relationship, but something within his life. You have been the reason for him to smile, or so he says, so respect what he says and be there in any way you can.

    Perhaps, join him in his sessions with his therapist. Ask the therapist what he/she recommends and follow their guidance. If need be, give him his space and allow him to sort out his life and difficulties in order to be healthy later on for you.

    I think the best thing and only thing you can do as his girlfriend and friend is to be there for him. Don't focus on what you have and have not done, but what you can do. Be his support system, his shelter, his rock. Give him guidance and consistently tell him how beautiful of a person he is and how happy he makes you. Bring the positive into his life and the love he needs right now.

    I'm sorry for this tough time with your boyfriend, I hope the best for the two of you. Best of luck!

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  • i agree with what the first guy said - be supportive and a good girlfriend etc.

    HOWEVER - try to talk to him about it and find out what is going on

    how? open up about a hard experience from YOUR life.. show him you understand and sympathize

    good luck!

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