How to flirt? (cause I got no clue)

So I've never gotten into a situation trying to flirt with someone, it just more or less happens by accident. I'll be talking to a girl, and all of a sudden she starts giggling and blushing/playing with her hair (and I realize that I've been flirting with her and not even knowing it). How do I do this on a conscious level, I wanna be flirty and fun, so I can try to get he girls that I like. Help please!


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  • The key is not just to flirt but to escalate. When she's giggling and playing with her hair, she's begging you for attention. Fight the urge to give her exact answers to her questions or complimenting her. This will just satisfy her urge to be "good enough" for you. Keep dangling that carrot. A favorite trick of mine is to give the slightest smile, and reach out gently and brush her hair just over one of her ears with my fingers and say, "There, I fixed your hair." (even if there's nothing wrong). This does two things 1)shows her you're not afraid to touch her and 2)makes her think she looked disheveled before that point and so now she KNOWS she's not good enough for you.

    From there you escalate to occasionally putting your hand on her back/hip. If it's going really well, give her a compliance test. Point at your cheek and say "Kiss on cheek". If it's going as well as you think, she'll do it. If she doesn't, it's not over, you just need to punish her. Turn your body slightly away from her and act distracted. If she does do it, then say, "OK well I guess I should pay you back..." (acting reluctant) and then slowly and gently kiss both her cheeks. She will be melting in her panties.


    • Yes, this kind of small "tricks" actually work. Of course, you have to make them a natural part of your repertoire. Kind of like driving a car: read the theory, and then practice. It works. But aside from the "micro," a guy also needs to remember the "macro," the preparations that lead up to a relaxed flirt. Like working out, having your life in order, having hobbies that make you feel sure about yourself, practicing talking to people in the street, all those things. But it's all fun.

    • Erik's definitely right, everything I said up there is no good unless you act like this is who you REALLY are and it is totally natural for you to act this way. Women might not be that bright when it comes to picking men, but they have a 6th sense for real confidence.

  • If you really want to learn, you should google "The DJ Bible". It is a collection of posts from the SoSuave forum, threads that were deemed particularly noteworthy. It is big, but you only need to read the ones marked Must Read first, and only the first post in every thread.

    I promise you, it is good.