I can't stop overreacting.

I have two guy friends who are very blunt and sometimes have a rough sense of humor.

One of them made a comment while we were out and said " You're not really sexy...you're just pretty." I didn't get mad but I got pretty hurt and went into the bathroom and cried.

Then tonight I was watching a movie with one of them and my sister came in, she said that she thought her butt had gotten bigger then mine and my friend said " That's really not possible."

And I shot him a look and he goes "What? You know that you're curvy." I've told him before that I'm insecure about my lower body. And I told him he should leave and that I wanted to sleep.

They always make jokes about me having a small chest and other things.

Did I overreact? If so why can't I stop? I used have a rough sense of humor too and for whatever reason when they make jokes about my body I lose it.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well - I have a couple dudes who are pretty blunt too. Me and my roomie went to chill in their dorm and one of them commented on how saggy her boobs were. Me and her were like >:O.

    But we just shoved it off because well, opinions don't really matter - especially about looks and body.

    What one guy thinks is just pretty - another will think your absolutely delish.

    But on no, us girls dare not point out anything and tease what the guys are secure about or holy f*** they get pissed.

    I made a comment at one of my guy buds who had been working out - and I was completely not serious - and said " all that lifting and you still have all that blubber -"

    Now keep in mind - he's an average sized dude with a tad bit of pudge. He got extremely defensive about it. I was like so it's okay for you to talk about my roomie's boobs?

    Don't give what you can't take - and he like fumed off.


    I take what they say with a grain of salt - usually we understand we're both just joking / teasing but sometimes that line gets crossed - randomely and unexpectedly.

    You did kind of overreact to the sexy / pretty thing because it's just his opinion. Not every guy is going to think your sexy. Don't care how much you hang out with them. At least he was being honest in what he thought instead of telling you what you wanted to hear.

    As far as the butt thing - that dude may have thought that would have been a compliment. Big butts are actually not terrible to have these days. You look better in a pair of jeans lol.

    Maybe he thought you'd be all like " oh lol shut up he he ha ha -" and take it as a compliment.

    I say you should love your ass. In my culture it's a big deal to have one lol and in my best friend's culture too.

    Ass is a blast." That's what one of my dude friends said lol

    So love your tushy.

    As for small boobs - there ain't nothing you can do about them unless you have thousands of dollars sitting around for surgery.

    So love your boobs. They're purpose is to nourish your children, and your husband will 100% respect you for nurturing his kids later on.

    I think you'd be more steely if you had more confidence. Don't let not getting compliments and their prodding f*** with you.

    You know the type of people you were going to be dealing with when the friendships started so.

    If it gets to a point where your about to split his skull - then it's time to tell him to back off.

    If you lose a friend because your uncomfortable - they weren't much of a friend for making you that uncomfortable anyway - and should definitely be understanding and sensitive to your state of being.


What Guys Said 1

  • They are used to treating you as one of the guys, and have forgotten you're a girl, and will get offended by jokes and comments which would not offend a guy. You need to remind them.


What Girls Said 2

  • I think you should flat out tell them their comments about your body are offensive.Because it is an insecurity of yours you're prone to getting upset.Just tell them "Bluntly"to cut the jokes.They may see you as one of the guys hence their behavior.

    Concerning them not thinking you are "sexy"...once again comments that offend you...TELL THEM.

    I believe that everyone needs to take responsibility for what they say or do.So...tell them.If they are truly your friends,they will understand.

  • You did overreact a bit. I think the first guy didn't really mean it as an insult. He was probably oblivious to the fact that it hurt your feelings.

    Next time, tell them that you don't appreciate it when they make body jokes. If they don't stop after that, then they aren't truly your friends.