Why is it that the standards, traits, attributes that make a guy attractive to girls, make him successful?

with girls also make him successful in life? seriously, why does it have to be like that? that's what pisses me off, why does it always have to come down to a guy's social-skills, conversation-skills, attitude, mentality, mindset, way of thinking, character, his passion, drive, goals, overall, seriously, it pisses me off that girls have these such extremely high-standards of guys.

Updates:
because I hear people say all the time "if you have bad social-skills, conversation-skills, the wrong attitude, the wrong mentality, the wrong mindset, the wrong way of thinking, no goals, no passion, then you are going to struggle in many more things, not just girls" you see, that's what I mean, it's not fair, girls can be bratty, boring, immature, they can be bitchy, needy, clingy, have no life, but as long as they are hot, most guys will still accept them, date them, etc.
C'mon, a perfect example is Online Dating, a girl can literally have nothing written on her profile, but she will still get tons of messages, meanwhile even if a guy is very hot, good-looking, but he has little or nothing written on his profile, he will get no responses, seriously, why do guys have to be the "better man" in order to be boyfriend material, to be attractive to women, meanwhile any woman can get any guy, man, most guys will accept a girl who is not the right one

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Most Helpful Guy

What Girls Said 4

  • I would say it's because men tend to be less discerning at some points in their lives, but when it comes down to what guys want for the long term I would say they're looking for a lot of the same traits- good attitude, conversation skills, character, drive, passion etc. I mean, sure you might be able to stand a really hot girl you can't talk to, has a mindset that is completely opposite of yours, a character you don't like and no drive for a little while but it's not going to last. Some women are less discerning too when they just want to have fun, but for the long run they're not willing to settle.

    Me- I'm not willing to waste time with a guy I can't talk to, especially if I don't like his mentality and he has no passion or drive. I don't care if he's passionate about something that's no going to make him a lot of money (like art) as long as he has goals for his life. Sorry if you think it's unfair but that's life.

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    • why do girls want to settle down, or get married earlier than guys do?

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    • You could date men- then you wouldn't have to deal with it...

    • if only I was attracted to them, sadly I am not

  • Maybe it's on you, maybe men need to stop being so shallow, because that is essentially what you are complaining about that women simply have to look good and men have to "put in work". Set higher standards for women and then your life will be equal. But if you constantly have this chip on your shoulder no one is gonna want to be around you male, female and eventually even animals.

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    • still easy for you women

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    • Well obviously you agree with him. lol this is the second question you aked on the same topic. What exactly is your goal for women to feel pity and sleep with you? What is wallowing really gonna get you. I can say its this and that for men but I'm not a man so I don't truly know. How can you say its easier for women if you have never lived as one, you don't know. I mean who is gonna get best answer in the pity party the guy who says your right boo hoo? This is really pathetic at best, move on.

    • no, I just want women to wake up and realize how blessed, gifted they are to be women

  • C O N F I D E N C E.

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    • thats what I mean, guys have to have confidence, girls do not

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    • so fake it.

    • yeah, not easy to fake though

  • we women have to be more picky, choosy, selective, you men can produce, father an infinite number of offspring, for us women it is limited

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What Guys Said 6

  • Wait, are you asking why the attributes that make a man successful in life are the same attributes that make him successful with women? If so, I guess the answer is because women want to be with a guy that is successful in life.

    But I don't think you are really asking that, I think you are upset because your traits not only hamper you with your day to day life, but also hamper your social life as well. Would that be correct?

    I am going to answer this assuming that is what you are getting at.

    Women, in general, do not have extremely high standards. I think the problem is that your standards of yourself may be too low. I mean if you have bad social skills, a bad attitude, no goals and no passion for anything, how can you even imply that some woman should be interested in you? For what possible reason should a woman become emotionally invested in someone like that?

    If you have no goals and no passion, what do you have to live for? If you can't find a single thing in your life that excites you, why should anyone else?

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    • agreed, that is where I'm getting at

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    • as for moaterboat, I do not enjoy that we guys have to have these traits

  • You should be grateful that girls place the highest standards on men (especially the best quality girls). If you aren't willing to give life 100% take risks, work hard, speak your mind, stand by your friends and what your believe in. What are you willing to do give 50% and pretend that your failure doesn't bother you?

    Why should they be interested in you when you clearly aren't that interested in being your best or living to your highest potential.

    Be grateful that even if you don't want to be the best man you can be they won't accept less of you then your full potential. That right there is one of the best qualities women have and to act like it is somehow a negative always amazes me about guys.

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    • i don't like it, because it is a chore, burden, to do

    • that makes it easier for girls to get a date, that's why

  • lol because only a small percentage of girls are hot. the rest are passed up no matter how good and decent of people they are. do you think THAT'S fair to them ?

    not to mention, all those hot girls only have a window of attractiveness.. once they hit like 28-32, it's game over.

    but for you as a guy, you can constantly build and improve on who you are

    so I fail to see why your investing energy into being negative instead of just improving yourself

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    • are you saying, implying "men age like wine, women age like milk"?

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    • interestesting, great to know

    • i gave you the link

  • i think you've just answered your own question

    i agree with you that there are a bunch of double standards when it comes to dating and they suck, but we can't blame the women for that

    just picture yourself in a girl's shoes. if you were a really good looking girl and always had men hitting on you and sending you messages, etc. how would you act?

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    • lol that would be awesome, it would boost my self-esteem, ego, very high

    • i hate the standards women have

  • probably biology, evolution

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  • yeah it's a chore, burden, but I have no choice but to deal with it

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