I just want to look better

so I'm a little nervous about this but I just want to be more social and attractive to women but I feel like there are some changes I want to make so ladies if you would take a look at my pics and tell me what you think I could do to improve my appearance I would appreciate it.

Im 5'8 so I'm mot that tall for a guy I weigh about 190 pounds I'm in decent shape but still have a bit of a flabby stomach so I could stand to lose some weight. I wear bifocals Because I was born with cataracts but I would like to get contacts but is there a better way to wear bifocals so they don't look as thick or bulky?

I usually keep a pretty short fade haircut and clean shave or a small shadow. any advice would be appreciated. thanks


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You look fine. You shouldn't be so self-conscious, but it's okay, because most of us have been there.

    Keeping clean shaven is good.

    If you went to lose some of the midriff, do some crunches and core work, but exercise alone won't do everything, like honeyItsme said. If you do exercise and don't eat enough, you body will actually feed on muscle tissue for fuel. You don't want to do that. Eat enough, but eat healthy. Maybe you already do. Get plenty of protein. Don't go for protein shakes all day. Protein shakes as a substitution for food will make the muscles look "soft". If you can stick to a weight-lifting regimen with cardio and ab work on your non-lifting days for 1.5 months, you should start to see improvements. 1.5 months is scientifically the amount of time it takes to make or break a habit. It doesn't mean you make it or break it necessarily, but after that period of time you develop a rhythm and it's not as difficult to stick to it. Good luck but I don't think you need to worry =)

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What Girls Said 9

  • You're fine. Just work on toning up. The glasses you can change easily. Find a good eye doctor to go to and they'll have plenty of different lenses to choose from. The people working there are usually pretty helpful at helping you find the best ones to fit your face. Short hair is fine. Maybe try different shaving styles on your face. I suggest you clean up a little more and get rid of some of your facial hair.

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    • yea I'm working out 4 days a week now to get more toned. do you mean shave all my facial hair or just most of it like leave my mustache and go tea?

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    • Mostly agree what she said, just gonna add that when you workout you need to do more than weights. I don't know if you are or not, but doing weights won't really help you drop fat, for that you need to eat well and do some cardio. Run, bike, swim, play basketball, whatever works for you.

    • You also need to diet too.

  • Bifocals? Call them glasses please :-) There are so much things you could do to enhance your appearance. There are stylish glasses out there that will give you that sexy nerd boy look. A little bit of lower body ab work out daily should give you that tight core. It doesn't mean that you have to go crazy and work out until you have a cardiac arrest, its going to take time. 5'8 isn't bad, because you won't find a girl past 5'7 often. I think the biggest thing you'll need to work on is confidence. Its something that is a must. Girls adore guys with confidence, not cockiness of course, but a little bit of courage can take you a long way.

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    • I hear that a lot about confidence but it just seems like a lot of people put on a act and are not really what they are projecting. I think of confident males and the stereotype of a frat boy slamming a beer on his head and yelling who wants to f***. so I guess I have a pretty warped view of what a confident guy is. what do you notice when you see a confident guy?

    • Lol that's pretty funny. I think confidence is when you're walking with your head high and not afraid to be yourself. I like it when guys are respectful yet outspoken at the same time. I think you've described cockiness. Nothing turns me off more then a guy with guns thinking he's the hottest guy in the world...I think you'll do fine. Try not to be too shy and try not to be too cocky. Sort of like a middle ground.

    • makes sense lol be balanced

  • I'd say just focus on loosing weight, ton up. You don't need to be muscular, just try to get in good shape.

    If you want contacts, get them. :P

    Try growing your hair out and try a clean shave later on?

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  • aight, aight.. from looking at your pics I can tell you a few things :) 1st step.. eyes! either get some contacts or get a nice, slick pair of glasses.. 2nd.. body! go to the gym, do some exercises or run etc to loose some weight.. 3rd.. hair! let your hair grow out, let it get some length to it :) hope I helped :) best of luck man :)

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  • I actually think you look okay, but if you're unhappy do something about it! How you actually look matters so much less than how you feel about how you look.

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    • yea I know your right I just think I will feel better if I change my look a bit

  • oh my god are you listning to your self you want to look butter don't you have more things butter religion maybe

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    • theres nothing wrong with wanting to look better. no I don't do the whole religion thing I'm agnostic.

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    • thats fine I understand but yes you were being judgmental just read your comment above. However no harm done you seem really nice and thanks I'm glad you found my style a bit interesting lol.

    • as you said no harm done ;) good lukck to you

  • I think you should grow your hair out and see how it looks.

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    • I thought about that before but the longest I was able to go was three months and It just didn't seem to work for me. It got on my nerves lol. If I were to grow it out. how long where you thinkin?

    • Idk just a bit longer, nothing drastic. But if it gets on your nerves don't do it, haha.

    • ok I hear lol thanks for your comments

  • i sen your picture and I can say that nothing to worry. You still look good.

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  • you and me both. :/

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What Guys Said 8

  • Get contacts. You can have them in pretty much 24/7 so you won't have to worry about wearing thick glasses in public.

    Grow your hair out a bit. Try different things ( I think you'd look better with longer hair-- about 1.5-2 inches on top and half an inch on the sides faded ). Make your facial hair longer or shave it.. It looks trimmed, but it's not a full layer of hair, so I'm thinking you just trimmed it too short.

    Lower your body fat % via a strong combination of weightlifting and long distance running (or whatever reasonable combo of resistance training and cardio you prefer).

    As for your approach.. just pretend your a hot shot in your head.. then sooner or later you start to believe it and project it without even thinking about it.

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  • Great smile. Working out will broaden your shoulders - which will make the midsection look thinner.

    To actually lose the fat, while keeping the muscle, 80% of that is a change to your diet - exercise alone will not get you anywhere near. More protein and a lot fewer carbs and processed fats. Lots of water. Much smaller portions, and more frequent meals, with healthy snacks.

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    • I ded read that a few places eat smaller more frequent meals thanks

    • | | |

      v v v myth

    • Yes. The reason for smaller portions is to help your stomach shrink, so you feel fuller faster and don't overeat. It actually able to shrink on its own a LOT and VERY quickly - the fact that they advertise surgical methods is IMHO criminal.

      Exercise makes you burn calories and that makes your body want to make up for it by eating extra. The body basically tries to maintain the level of fat it's used to. It will play tricks on you like getting freakish urges once in a while. Stick to your guns

  • Being social is another thing but in terms of looks, you said you're in decent shape so judging from the pics, I think you have a decent muscular frame (like most big white guys lol) so just lose some body flub and gut and you'll be fine. Focus on cardio, fat loss and healthy food/nutrition because you can lift weights and do a billion crunches but it won't help if the abs/muscles are lying underneath that layer of body fat. After you achieve your body fat/weight loss goal. The biggest step is maintaining it or else you'll easily gain it all back.

    Lose the college frat clothes for more style and classy stuff and replace those glasses with something more stylish, try rectangular-ish frames and see how they look! You'll be GQ'ing in no time! It'll also help you self-confidence if you look and feel sharper.

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    • yea I think that's what I want is just to get a better more polished look and Ill feel better. thanks for your advice by the way. I never really had a problem exercising its just nutrition is the harder part for me. do you know a lot about nutrition?

    • Not an expert in fat loss nutrition though. But definitely do some research and stick with a nutrition plan. Stay away from junk food, greasy/fatty food, sugar-filled food and fast food. Think healthy and clean food! Steamed veggies, lean proteins, drink lots of water, and cut back on liquor. You can spoil yourself once a while with some 'unhealthy' food here and there. You don't need to use any dieting programs on TV and stuff. K.I.S.S! Watch what you eat and eat smart and healthy!

  • Start going to the gym

    get trendy frames

    dress up

    what worked for me is:

    look in the mirror with your head cut off.

    Do you like your body? If yes, then its all in your head. If not then change your body and do this step again

    Now with your head only.

    Do you like your face? If not, then change what needs to be changed.

    I think most of the time we don't like ourselves but what we should be doing is accepting ourselves.

    When I wanted to look better.

    I did that same exercise, I came to the conclusion that it was mostly in my head. Yes, I was a little skinny but nothing too drastic.

    Plus, one day I looked in the mirror and said to myself. I don't wanna live my life like this.

    A life where I don't feel comfortable in my own skin.

    I want to be happy and now I'm happy but a perfectionist aA

    And like this side a whole lot better haha

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    • your probly right its just mostly a mental thing but I think I will feel better if I look better to myself.atleast.

    • Good luck Bro

      If you need anything lemme know!

    • thanks again

  • I'm not gay, but your smile is fantastic.

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  • I would try to wear a bit more formal(ish) clothing. Otherwise you look just fine I think.

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  • You can do it encourage yourself.

    Do you have a picture of yourself.

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    • yea its on my profile page

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    • thanks again man

    • no problem Proverbs 5:6

      Have any questions message me

  • Your glasses appear to be a bit tacky but you are groomed well. Try going for "Ray Banesque" style frames. If you slimmed down I think that would transform your image from soft to stud. Cut down on the foid you eat and go for a jog every day.

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