Is it OK if your a male and you want to wear bras and panties?

I am a 19 year old male. I have a girlfriend I have been dating for 2 and a half years who I love very much. I would lay my life down for her if I had to. We know a lot of things about each other and we share many secrets. The biggest thing she knows about me is that I like wearing bras and panties and I have worn them around her and she says she is OK with it, but when I ask about it she won't give me answers I have even stopped wearing them completely but I still find myself wanting to wear them. She says I can but I know she doesn't like it and I will do anything to make her happy cause her happiness means everything to me. I am just into female clothing and she said we could have some fun with it but we never did. I don't know if I should wear them or not? Or If there is something wrong with me?

Updates:
It doesn't matter anymore... I already lost her due to something that has nothing to do with me wearing bras and panties. Thanks for your comments everyone...

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Hi,

    I would suggest that you do NOT wear them around her. IF you wear it, wear it when you are NOT around her, and keep the whole situation away from her.

    I say this only because, I feel like if you keep doing that your relationship will end. And you seem to be in love, and that would just end badly. Don't bring it up anymore.

    I would also suggest that you don't talk about it until you and her are engaged, IF THAT EVER HAPPENS. She probably does not want to make you feel bad, because she loves you too, but think about her and her feelings, take her into consideration. Do that on your own time. Don't bring it up, like I've said before. There is NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU! You take pleasure from something out of the norm, but it's fine. You should not get married without having cleared the air with her about that, or with whom ever you will marry. Until then, just don't bring it up. I have repeated myself, but its for emphasis :D

    I REALLY REALLY do hope that everything works out. Life goes on :)

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What Girls Said 11

  • It's a difficult situation because you should be able to do what makes you happy, but she also has a right to feel uncomfortable with it. I think a good compromise would be to wear them sometimes, but not when she will see it. Personally I can say that I wouldn't want to see my boyfriend wearing women's underwear. It's just not something I feel very comfortable with and it's not something I want to be involved in. But at the same time, I wouldn't want to tell him not to do it if it was something that made him happy. So I think for him to do it but not in front of me would be a good compromise.

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  • It's not normal, but I don't think there's anything wrong with it. From your story though it doesn't sound like your girlfriend is into it, but she loves you enough to want you to have your fetish and not make a fuss. You can try bringing it up again and have a direct conversation with her about the subject, how she feels about it, and what you would like from her regarding it. However if she shys away from the topic, or shuts you down it's best to keep her out of that part of your life. Not to say you can't still wear bras and panties, but you may need to limit it to you time, or find a fetish club where it would be acceptable (assuming your girlfriend is cool with it too). Good luck, and don't stress about being you.

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  • If she said she's okay with it but didn't act enthusiastic, she probably loves you enough to let you do it even though she's not really into it.

    You like it and she hasn't complained, so you should keep doing it if it makes you happy. If she wants you to stop or cut back then maybe you should comply but as long as you love each other then it's fine.

    But honestly, you should be careful with secrets like that. I dated a guy in high school who liked doing that. He cheated on me, dumped me, and spread some vicious untrue rumors about me to make his cheating seem okay. So I told people he liked that and showed some pictures (and it was awesome because he had his own women's underwear) and they circulated like wildfire. It might not have been nice but the bastard deserved it.

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  • Well maybe you could ask her if she's really not bothered by it, if you aren't that sure... I would actually find it awesome if a guy I was dating liked wearing woman's underwear and bras, and would have fun with it, maybe some role-playing... xD so I don't think there's anything wrong with you.

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    • Yeah that's what I want to do. Have her dress me up and do role playing and we could go shopping together and all that fun stuff, but she would never do any of that with me.

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    • well Inhave been talking her. She says I can wear them and she wants to try it. So I guess we will see where it goes.

    • That's good, just make sure that you tell her if it doesn't work for her or she feels uncomfortable to let you know so it won't be a cause of any problems.

  • your a guy...which I don't understand since you like to wear bras? YOU HAVE NO TITS what's the point in wearing a bra WTF whyyyyy

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    • it doesn't matter anymore... I lost her already do to something that has nothing to do with this...

    • okay that's strange... what happened? you posted this question like a day ago!

  • There is NOTHING wrong with you. You're not hurting anyone by doing this. So, don't listen to any of the haters or people that just do not understand.

    You really need to talk to your girlfriend. Maybe she just doesn't understand. But, if you both are open and can talk about it, hopefully you will both feel better about this.

    Just be you because you're the only one who can!

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  • There is nothing wrong with you.

    Just wear them when she isn't around so you both get what you want.

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  • no nothing is wrong with u. my boyfriend wore my panties too but he was joking and he also but on a bra lol when no was was home he was dancing in the bra and socks lol

    i wouldn't care

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  • She probably loves you as much as you love her. It might not really be her interest but she is willing to let you do it because she loves you.

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  • Id break up with my guy if he did that. Not something I would be into. Best thing to do is ask her some more. everyone has their fetishes

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  • Personally this is a deal breaker for me... it would really bother me if my man did this. Once or twice as a costume, or curiosity, is fine. Regularly... no.To me, this is half way to cross dressing. Maybe it's because the only person I know who did this has started going through the changes to become a woman, and it's made me biased?

    It sounds to be a kind of important thing to do.. in which case keep wearing them.

    I think your girlfriend doesn't want to tell you what to do or deny you of something you enjoy, but I think it does bother her a little. Speak to her about it.

    Also.. side note... do you wear hers or do you own your own? This may be some of the uncomfortableness.

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    • No I buy and wear my own.

    • @update, I'm sorry you guys broke up :/ I know it's horrible, hope you're ok...

What Guys Said 5

  • If it was a joke like, link

    Other than that it is creepy as f***. Cross dressing I guess, the only thing I can compare it to is if a girl was putting rogain on her chest and growing chest hair... I don't know doing a girl pretending to be a guy would be creepy.

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    • I don't see how wearing bras and panties compares to a female growing chest hair. I am not making physical changes here I am just wearing the clothing I feel most comfortable in. What's wrong with being comfortable? Its just clothing...

  • Whatever floats your boat

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  • personally I think its weird as hell but if you lke it and your Girlfriend doesn't mind then by all means go for it

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  • There is nothing wrong with you. I wear bras and pantys too and no one else knows. Its very fun for me to find and buy new bras in various different colors and padding levels.

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  • It is no big deal.

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